I want to thank each and every one of you for the incredibly helpful opinions and experiences you've shared. I think they've not only helped me, but will probably help other people who lurk around the boards and are considering (or may now be considering) antidepressants.
A VERY special thank you to PreppingBride tho. It seems absolutely completely
idiotic to me that I never considered this. I can't believe I didn't put 2 and 2 together.... but my birth control may be a factor here. When I was 17 or 18, my doctor prescribed me birth control (Tricyclen), and I took it for a year or so. During that year, thinking back on it... I remember being in a relationship where I felt moody and depressed, and cried a lot and got upset over small things. I eventually broke up with that guy, thinking that I just... wasn't happy in general.
Once away at university a few months later, the doctors on campus prescribed me Tricylen Lo, saying that they weren't going to be making Tricyclen anymore, and that it just had lower hormone dosages. I was on that for all of university.
2 and 2, Jessica, jesus.
When I came back home, my family doctor had still prescribed regular Tricyclen. (Turns out they do still make it; no idea what the campus doctors were talking about.) But I didn't take it, I wasn't on anything, because I wasn't.. er..
active. Then a few months ago when my boyfriend was set to move over here, I started taking it again, religiously, not missing a single day... and for the last few months, I've been miserable, sobbing over nothing, moody, etc.
I just can't believe it never occurred to me that it might be my pill. I never recognized the fact that I was likely having side effects from the pill before I switched to a lower hormone level. So, before I consider antidepressants, I'm going to go to my doctor tonight and request that he prescribe me a lower hormone birth control, and see how that affects my mood, my outlook on life. I would hate to get a cast for a papercut, if it turns out that all I need to change is my birth control....!
I'll keep everyone posted. I've been exercising regularly, eating well, getting.. well, my regular amount of sleep which is around 6 and a half to 7 and a half hours of sleep... and now I'm gonna change up the birth control and see if the mood swings and general feeling of depression and self-loathing let up.
Thanks again; all you ladies are amazing and wonderful, and I don't know what I'd do without you all.
