Scale did not move this morning..but still in shock. I weighed myself like three times in shock that it's not just a temporary thing. lol.

Apparently a few of my friends are concerned about me because I'm losing weight... one is worried I've gone anarexic or something just because I actually am losing the weight. My other friend countered that I love food too much to ever do that (she's right!) despite being concerned. I'm not really sure how to deal with this. I'm actually successful in focusing in and losing weight yet a few of my close friends aren't supportive (although they've been itching to lose weight forever themselves). Ugh, can't win. Ideas how to deal with this? A really traumatic death just happened for me and it really got me moving on this. Also, I smoked my first cigarette two nights ago... bad, but it really reminded me of him. Not going to get addicted.

Mary: It's good to hold yourself accountable. That's what I learned when I fell off the wagon previously. If you don't and put it off, it never gets better. Also, that site is frickin amazing. I just spent soooo much but all the stuff on mod is so adorable. Ugh, must not buy.... ps I saw a picture of your outfit on one of the threads; you look amazing!

feral: he sounds sweet and just remember TOM weight goes away and you're back down to your normal weight. :)

forestroad: that look delicious.

Good Morning Ladies... I seriously just woke up a half hour ago... i never sleep in this late...but I was with new boy last night and since he had to get the kid to bed first it was late when I finally got there... however she was still awake and very concerned with who her daddy was talking to... she kept sneaking out of her room but never made it very far... she did she my purse but he convinced her she was crazy haha...

Jess-Good luck with everything...it sounds sooo exciting :)

Feral- Yes sodium...I never thought this affected me however lately I've come to think it does... I still eat salt on everything... ugh... and my weight is never the same everyday lol... and aww Mikey...reminds me of that commercial

And I wish I was getting my TOM because my birthday is next week and I would really LOVE to not have it for that..

Loq- my friends are really discouraging and are like no way will you ever get to that goal weight thats too skinny blah blah blah... and they always want to eat out... it happens...they are proud of me however I think its scary that they may no longer have a fat friend

mary- you're so amazing... can I come live in your pocket so you can kick my butt?

forest- it looks amazing... thats what vacation is for

Alrighty my butt is off to the gym... I'm gonna try to do two hours on the elliptical... it makes me feel better...

People with no common sense drive me crazy.

Children drive me crazy.


Every day I go off campus for lunch.... which usually results in me going in the parking lot and sitting in my car, today it was errands, mostly because I need a break from the people in the building. Especially the kids.

Every day I put a NEON GREEN sign on my door, relatively eye level, that says "Please go to the MAIN OFFICE" complete with arrow "No one is avaialbe in Guidance." I turn the lights out. Unfortunately I cannot lock the door because other staff have to use the door to get to offices in the back.

And almost every day I come back to children sitting in my office. And I ask them... "Did you not see the sign?" "Were the lights being off and no one coming within a few minutes not a sign that NO ONE IS FREAKIN HERE?!?!!?"

And they are dumbfounded.

I hate stupid people.

/rant

Oh yeah, and one more thing.

When I was driving back into the parking lot today a teacher was walking her class back from lunch the long way because it is very nice outside. She was walking her children IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD (in the parking lot). They all saw me coming to which she lined them up IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD.... and of course they can't make a straight line and they can't NOT look so they're all gaggling at me. Then she proceeds to continue to walk them in the middle of the road so I have to wait for them... and then EVENTUALLY onto the sidewalk.

I really thought about running her over.

//RANT

So I definately haven't gone back and read like 3 the pages you ladies posted in the past day or so, but I miss you :)

I'm working (much needed lunch break) and my computer is actually letting me type right now, but I'll catch up on Friday :)

I'm trying to be good with my eating - There's NOTHING around here except for fast food, so I've been having the hotel breakfast buffet and eating at their restaurant at night and having salads for lunch (I hate salads, this is how dedicated I am). I also made friends with the fitness center. Of course, none of that made up for the awesome chocolate cake I had after dinner last night.

I hope you're all doing well :)

Hiiii girls I miss you!!!! Thank you everyone for all your congrats :) Made me feel good :D

Haley - I'm coming to live in Mary's pocket with you so she can kick our butt and cook yummy health food. And try not to stress too much!! I'm sorry to hear about the mini breakdown! Your time will come, I promise!! I've been looking for a job since graduation in June... and didnt get one til Jan. And I bet you'd make an amazing lawyer :D

stargz - dude that weather was psycho yesterday. i mean.... full on tornado warnings down here. I was watching tv and that horrible warning noise and it scrolled across the screen and everything! scary!!

mary - thouse clothes are SO cute. i can't wait to get down in size and start shopping!!!! and i'll actually be able to afford it... its amazing how things work out sometimes! I'm glad you handled the cookie situation, i'm sure the damage couldnt have been bad. thats like 34 steps forward and one step back? no biggie at all.

feral -dont run over children! lol, sorry some people are just idiots tho. i'm excited for you and mikey!! and dont worry about the scale, i'm sure its just sodium. I had a bunch of potato chips the other day and the scale definitely reflected it.... no bueno! and good luck with the nutrition test. did you decide if that book is any good?

loqjogger- Dealing with concerned friends is really really tough. I would say your best bet is to sit them down and have a serious conversation with them. Explain that you are working towards a goal, and you are doing it healthily, and you will not continue to create a calorie deficit (read - lose more weight) once you reach your goal. You aren't dieting to infinity, you're dieting to your goal. Then ask if they can support you rather than criticize and question your actions.

Hi kd and daisy may!! :wave: welcome!

forest - those pictures are awesome!!

arts - way to go owning that spin bike :D

ETA: Stella - good luck with the fast food situation!! I handled mine yesterday by trying taco bell's whole drive through diet tacos. They weren't too bad!


-----

So I am mystified by the scale this morning. I've eaten pretty much perfectly the past two days, except i dont think i actually had ENOUGH calories yesterday... i dont know if that's ever happened to me before, lol! BUT i haven't been keeping up on the workouts... so.... idk....

The other thing is that TOM just ended, so can we say WHOOSH?!!!??!!?

Scale says 173.0. HOLY ^%$%$#%?!!?? I can't decide if i should let the shock just be happiness or if i should wait and check again tomorrow. I'm leaning towards just being giddy!!! I mean, 2 pounds in 1 day? That means i earned another dancer dude in my signature, and it means i'm only 4 pounds away from not being obese, and the 160's!! That's the Vday goal!

Oh Universe.... you are kickin' my butt!

Ladies, I have a guilty confession. I had one tiny small dove chocolate piece of candy that had been sitting on my desk staring at me. And I have battled it all day. Actually, for a few days. When I finally gave in "hey, one little piece..." I opened it and realized it was DARK chocolate.

Which makes me sick.

HAHHAHA. The laugh is on me!

haley/stargzr/jess: thanks all for the advice. I mean, I've never been obese like some people might have been, but trust me, I've never been the svelte or thin friend. Most of my friends think of me as someone to eat bad food with them at any point, so I guess it's weird for them to see me buckling now for real... This is for me, not them and I'm doing this the right way. They seem more concerned by the fact I log my food/weigh myself/have my desktop background as my minigoal weight, but that is a proven method that works for me...and others. I look forward to the point where they understand that this is something I wanted to do and support me for what I'm doing.

stella: good job eating well. it's always tough eating well in that kind of situation.
jess: congrats! so close!!
feral: I said no to chocolate today too! :)

Sorry, I don't have time for personals, ladies...currently have 20 mins before I have to leave for work in which I have to eat and change. Ugggghhhhh Wednesdays aren't looking good for this semester!

Had a 90 min Jazz class this morning. Was fun, but I'm clearly the biggest girl in the room, which is never fun. I feel like everyone is staring at me when we do our conditioning stuff in the beginning, even though I'm totally fine at keeping up with everyone!! Grrrr.

Arts - Don't let their eyes get to you! I've found that 90% of the time, the other people in the room are focused on their workout - not yours!

Feral - That totally sucks!!! :C

Star - This is my first time buying clothes from them. If you look at the measurements, they give you flat measurements for the actual garment (which I hate, because the instructions are to find a piece of clothing you already own that fits well and try to match the measurements to that, but I never have anything that matches!!!) but their returns and exchanges are free and easy so we'll see!

Today was both good and bad. The cookies are gone, so that is a good thing. And I worked out with my friends for 50 minutes so thats another good thing. And I was eating perfectly well today, until I opted for seared tuna (delicious and a good choice) with terriyaki rice (bad choice.) and california rolls (bad choice.) for lunch, then had a small sandwich from Wawa when I was visiting John (ok choice...) and then my step dad brought home CHINESE FOOD and I had a little bit (BAD BAD BAD choice :C - even if I only have a little bit every two or three months the sodium is just AWFUL). So eating wise I fell way off the track today, but tomorrow I am eating ON PLAN. This binging here and there needs to STOP >:C. I'm so glad my snowboard trip is this weekend, I really can't wait. Hopefully I'll have another little whoosh from it!

I'm also excited because it's time I get to hangout with John one on one instead of with our group of friends around, and we get to hang out with my brothers, my sister, and her boyfriend.

I think I'm going to finish up my classwork and then head to bed early so I can get up and go spinning with my mom in the morning :)

my cats feet are squishy

Star and Platform- I haven't caught up on the chat--are you guys talking about Modcloth? I've been surfing that site for a year but have never pulled the trigger bc I don't want to deal with their sizing...I don't have anything to measure either!

Forest - Yeah, they had a super awesome sale today (70% off - it might still be going on), and with the prices I couldn't turn it down! I'll let you know how the sizing is once I get it. I've only ever bought jewelry there, but I know that their shipping is pretty fast :)