I want someone's opinion. So I'm really close friends with this guy (we hang out all the time, but have never dated or really even flirted). Anyways, he's going to this concert on Friday and had an extra ticket, and had invited me but now he's taking a date. And it really pisses me off. I mean I would never use my friend as a back up, if I invited them I would expect them to go. Is it wrong of me to be pissed off? Do you think i'm being jealous?
Hmm.
Well, I'd probably be slightly miffed myself, lol... If he asked you to go, he's being pretty flaky in now taking a date instead.
But as much as I'd probably be pretty annoyed, I'd pick my battles. If he's just a friend, getting pissed at him for going with someone else (despite it being totally logical to a girl) will strike MOST guys as being completely insane. I don't think their brains work in quite the same way... they don't often seem to understand the things that upset us, hehehehe.
But yeah... hashing it all out with him in a dramatic way might harm your friendship. I might casually mention in a playful half-joking way, "Btw, next time I get ditched for a date, I'm returning the favour. Get you Astros tickets, then take a date instead. " (Or whatever tickets he might like)
As for whether you're jealous... that depends. Like you, I have a close guy friend, we hang out a lot, but we've never flirted or dated. That being said, I've had a little crush on him for years. I'd never do anything about it, he has a girlfriend, and I'm just not that kinda girl... but do you have a crush on this guy? If so, it might be jealousy rearing its ugly head. Or it might be a normal friend-jealousy type thing. I know I get a bit upset if my girl friends ever ditch me for other people in general...
Did he invite you to go ? How did he UNINVITE you ? That sounds pretty rude and inconsiderate to me . Remember men are totally dense about things like this and probably won't understand why you are annoyed.
Ditto what Jelbb said. This has happened to me before (sadly, more than once) and you need to decide if you're going to treat him the same or continue to treat him like a crush and bend over backwards for him.
honestly...i went through a bad break up in January (I ended my relationship of 8 years). and i'm not really sure I like him or I like the comfort of having someone again. Plus, i'm not really sure i'm ready. And he's definitely not dating material in my mind, too critical and too selfish.
And it doesn't bother me that he goes on dates, it bothers me that he asked me and then didn't even uninvite me, just mentioned in passing that he was going with someone else. I think I'm just being sensitive because I've been going through a lot. I dont know.
Lol, ahhh, he's one of those. I've got guy friends like those... hehe.
Yeah, oversensitivity is a trait of many women... I don't need to have gone through a breakup to feel ya there. Again, I'd maybe mention in a casual non-confrontational way that ditching you wasn't cool, but try not to stress too much. Chances are he does't realize that he just did something incredibly douchey. And it's up to you to decide whether or not it's worth it to you to bring it to his attention.
i just want to meet a none douchebag. Is that even possible anymore? Seriously last night i went out with a friend and the only guy who hit on us didnt graduate from college, and didnt have a job. Not that it would matter, but I asked him what he did and he told me you dont ask people that. I was like WTF? I told him it was small talk....
That was in poor taste of him. Once you commit to someone and give your word--well, that's it. He doesn't sound like a very good friend or a very mature person.
Extraordinarily rude. I also would not waste any drama on him. And I wouldn't accept anymore invitations from him. If I did, and it happened again, I could only blame myself. There is no excuse for doing that to you.
He probably thinks of you as a friend and he would do that to a guy friend. It is hard to be best buds with a guy. He will always be hurting your feelings and then totally clueless about it. I think your reaction is normal if you like him as just a friend or if you have a crush. You would probably feel the same if a girl friend ditched you too. You should tell him that it was rude though. Just because he's a guy doesn't mean he should get away with being a bad friend. Good luck!!
It's the lack of consideration that I would find very unacceptable rather than wanting to go with a girl he was interested in.
I would be understanding however if he had approached me and explained the situation with some sort of olive branch... "I'll make it up. We'll do ___ another day" or really anything along those lines.
Unfortunately a lot of guys especially in the early 20's are not worth dating. Yes there are some exceptions but it just takes them so long to grow up. I wouldn't even stress about finding a non-douchy guy at the moment unless you're OK with dating someone closer or over 30. (My hubby is 11 years older so I'm bias fyi )
ya id be very mad, it shouldnt matter if your his date or not you are friends, you cant just ask someone to go cause you dont want to go alone then find some one else, that isnt nice, id have a little chat with this friend.
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" (Or whatever tickets he might like)
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