I second this. I had quite a few male friends prior to my weightloss. We were only friends. I liked this one in particular, but of course, since I was so heavy, he didn't give me the time of day. For the first few months of my weightloss, I dreamed about getting to a point where I would be thin enough for him to notice me. Then, after a while, I realized that if he didn't think I was good enough for him at my previous weight, why should my DREAM be to finally 'earn' his attention now?

I eventually met someone new, my fiance, who makes me not even remember that other guy's name...

Ugh. That's all I have to say is ugh. I was dating a guy 5 years my senior for most of this year (and last, and the other day he send me a "I know we can't be together but I just want you to know I love you" text), and even then he acted like a 2 year old sometimes. Not to mention he couldn't keep the house clean!

At this point I find I'm happier just hooking up with guys and having real fun and meaningful relationships with my friends. I figure I've got about 10-15 more years before I should even consider getting married so I might as well have a good time first.

Hallelujah.
You couldn't pay me to go back to being overweight and trying to date in my 20's, especially my early 20's. I know what a lot of people say, "it's all about confidence!" blah blah blah... 20 somethings are shallow and superficial, especially boys. It's all about image and physical attraction.

It's weird, though. A very good friend of mine is GORGEOUS. Like, just voted one of the most beautiful people of a large metropolitan area(seriously), and while guys gawk over her, she hardly ever gets approached. She feels like there is something wrong with her.

Personally, I don't think there are many guys in between who just know how to approach someone without being creepy or obnoxious or they are just too scared to ask. I think it's a 20-something male thing to be completely inept when it comes to the opposite sex.

Hey yall, this Samantha, new to the forums.
When it comes to this topic i think it really depends on the race/culture of the guy.
from what i see it seems that most white men have preference for slimmer girls, but when African-American men or my Nigerian men say that they don't mind bigger girls, they TRULY don't mind or sometimes even prefer bigger girls.

You get a big hallelujah from me. 20ish boys are idiots (for the most part)and don't know what's good for them even if it's smack in their face. Though I will agree with Samantha as my first bf was Guatemalan and he loved that I was curvy (though I think it was more about the boobs than anything). And I do tend to get hit on by more African-Americans or Latino guys than anything else. In the 20-something guy's defense though, my hubby is much younger than me and knows a good thing when he see it, and I know he will stick by me through thick and thin. So it really just depends on the guy.

Boys are dumb. Throw rocks at them.

I'm not sure if I'll ever find a decent one..my last two have cheated on me..how's that for ruining trust!

Sometimes you'll find it when you least expect. I have always felt like the guys I like NEVER liked me. And the few that did, I always thought something was wrong with them...and I was right!

3 years ago I was the biggest I ever was, 265. I had my tonsils taken out and lost almost 30 pounds in 2 months. I felt so so good about myself and when I ran into an old high school crush who was looking so fine, I could help but run up and say hey. We exchanged numers and have been together ever since. Yes, he is fit and actually has a great body and yes, I sometimes feel like a blob with a great face, but the point is that you may not need to lose weight to find someone please don't think it.

I'm losing weight to be healthy, but if my boyfriend just suddenly wants someone skinny then to **** with him too! See how the skinny *****es treat him!!!

I know how you feel

I feel that you got guys that think with the wrong head and guys that don't. My last boyfriend was 40, I know I know... I'm 27, that's a big age difference. In my case there was a reason that he was still single. (he had major problems!)

Anyways, I think if a guy is that shallow in his 20's it may take a while to get over it or maybe never will. He'll get treated bad by someone and eventually grow up or not.

I love the attitude here! Lose weight for you and when you do, they'll come around, you can smile and nod and keep going.... I feel that you have to be happy with you before you can ever be happy with someone else and if it takes someone else to make you happy, that can turn into co-dependency issues, which I think we all can agree is never a good thing.