LOL I looked at her profile and now I know her age. I didn't mean it as offensive at ALL because I have been with my sweetie since my junior year of highschool..4 years. She just looks young! Not that her age now ISN'T young..GAAAHHH I am just digging myself a bigger hole here aren't I LOL.

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
I know he does, because he knows how much I want to. I am pretty sure I think about it and fret about it much more than he does, though.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
Ugh, he's a Marine, and a First Class PFTer, too. He is very fit.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
Only if I bring it up. I don't think it matters as much to him as I imagine it does.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
Nope. :) But I do wish I looked better in certain lingerie.

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
He doesn't understand what it feels like to be out of shape, to NOT be able to just run 3 miles. He knows I will be slower, but I think he figures I'm just not trying as hard if I can't keep up with his "slow jog." So, I don't run with him anymore, LOL. But as far as the weight, no, I don't think he judges me for it. If he didn't exercise as much as he does for work, he'd probably be like me, he's not big into exercising unless he has to.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Not really. Not in front of Jon, anyway. I feel more self-conscious in clothing that does not fit well than when I am naked, odd as that sounds. If it is too big or too tight or too short, I feel like I am a fat girl. When I wear clothes that I love and that fit well, I do feel very sexy. So I pay close attention to how I dress and how things fit. I will always have a pear shape with a defined waist; now or 50 pounds down from now, the things that look good on me always will. So in certain styles, I will always feel confident, and that is sexy.

Oh, and we'll be married 6 years June 9th. We've been together since high school. He's my schweety.

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
He doesn't seem to understand why I feel I need to; he's apparently blind to it or something. He's willing to support me however I ask him to, but he doesn't see a need for it.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
He's skinnier than ****, with the kind of metabolism any of us here would KILL for. And I've contemplated doing so, every now and then. ;)

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
I'll ***** about it sometimes, or ask him to stop buying my favorite high-cal foods so much, but that's it.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
Well, I'm pretty self-conscious, so I'm always worried about doing things in positions that are more flattering to my problem areas. Yes, I think about those things.

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
Like I said, I don't think he sees an issue with it, he just sees that I have an issue with it. As someone who has never been overweight in his LIFE, he doesn't get it at all, but he tries to help.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
All the fooken time. Less so with him than with other people, but still pretty self-conscious.

Oh. And we've been together for three years, known each other for seven or so.

to answer the last question we have been together for 10 1/2 years and we will be married for 6 years in july.

I am going to answer these questions from the perspective of a maintainer who is with a maintainer who were both newly at their lowest weights when they met, respectively:)

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?Not at all.
Is he "normal" or also overweight?
We are trying to lose our relationship weight- for him, that's about 15 pounds (but it's all in the middle and I don't want it to go:( )
How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?I have never been shy and have never felt shy around him, so other than normal bad days not really, although at first I was concerned how much that extra skin was apparent.
Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
One of the things that puts me at ease about the issue is the fact that we were both overweight children/adults and have the same struggles- he definitely understands and would never judge me about my weight. He wants a healthy and happy Jen, and if that means I have to gain a few or lose a few to be that happy person doesn't matter to him. The flip side is that we tend to be enablers and then try to blame the other for it :p
Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Absolutely. Less so than before, but it's human.

We've been together 2.5 years and co-habitating for 2.

Thanks for responding, junebug. It's good to get a maintainer's perspective on this, too.

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
I don't think he'd mind as long as I don't look unhealthy. He's supportive of us going to do healthy things, but just because he feels he should get out more. He seems to like me the way I am right now.
But at the same time I am no longer "overweight" according to my BMI, but I'm only about 5lbs away from it. So I'm in sort of an awkward zone currently.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
Probably about 10-20lbs overweight. Or at least that's what he tells me.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
Every so often we talk about it. Well, he talks about himself being fat. I don't bring up my dieting. Mainly because he knows I'm a bit skinnier than him and I don't wanna bum him out.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
If it has... I hope he doesn't lose then. He already wants it more than once a day! :o And that's on the weekdays...

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
He seems to truly like my body. He brought me lunch today, because I forgot the one I made myself in the fridge and he got me a bagel with cream cheese, nutri-grain bar and rice krispie treat.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Not really. He's currently a 7 month one night stand so when the relationship starts out with very drunky nookie you can only make yourself seem better from there. :lol:

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
The only reason I think he wants me to lose weight is because I am not happy with myself and for health reasons. He's always told me that he loves me the way I am. But lately, I have been feeling really bad about how I look and it has affected our relationship.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
He's normal weight. He's gaining a bit of a tummy but if he wanted to, he could lose it in a week. (Lucky *******!!!)

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
We've never talked about my weight "seriously" until recently. And the negativity always comes from me. His only argument is that my unhappiness (regarding my weight) seems to be affecting every aspect of our relationship and it makes him feel that I don't want to be with him .

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
At first, I had no problem with it. But right now, I am the heaviest I have ever been and I'm kind of reluctant to be intimate because of the way I look.

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
The only thing he has judged me on is my actions towards the whole weight loss thing. He asks me if I am so unhappy, why don't I do something about it?

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Oh, yes. My bf is a hottie. And sometimes I wonder, why is he with me?? he could probably have any (smaller) girl he wanted, but he's with me. And I'm sure there are girls out there wondering the same thing (skanks!! lol).

It's gonna be 3 years this June that we've been together and we've been living together for 2 of them.

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
My weight didn't bother him at my highest weight. But he knew it bothered me. He wants me to be healthy and he knows my goal is about 20 pounds away still, so yes, he wants me to lose weight, but not for him, for me. He loves my "new" body and I'm sure he'll be even more thrilled with the "newer" one once I get it!

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
He's about 1" taller than me (if that) and 13 pounds lighter than me. So he's definitely NOT overweight. He's very lean.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
I talk about it CONSTANTLY. He probably wants me to lose weight more so that I'll STOP TALKING than anything else! LOL Little does he know that's not going to happen... he doesn't bring anything up, I think he's scared of getting into trouble!

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
I don't think the weight affected that so much as moving in together. It has, however, been better since I started losing. I'm more confident, happier that I'm finally doing something good for myself!

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
He doesn't judge me for my weight -- I do, though. At the same time, he does NOT understand. He has no idea what it's like to want food all the time, to have it preoccupy your every waking thought, to NOT be able to eat whatever you want without gaining an ounce. But he really does try, thank goodness! He definitely LISTENS.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Yes, but not because of him. He has never done anything to make me feel self-conscious about myself. And like someone else mentioned, I'm less comfortable if I'm in ill-fitting clothing than if I'm naked.

How long have you been together?
This is a longer one night stand than Colleen! We've been together for almost 4 1/2 years, living together for 9 months.

I love reading about everyone's significant others, and it really helps to know that I"m not alone with this stuff!

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?

I think she probably does, more along the lines of wanting me to be healthy, but she has never said it. I am moving to her area in the next few months and she'll mention cooking healthy meals together, etc. I never feel like she's ashamed of my body or anything like that, though.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
She's much shorter than I am... and she's tiny. For her, "putting on weight" is maybe 5 pounds. I think she weighs in the ballpark of 110, and she's 5'2.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
I'll joke about going to the gym and "getting buff," and she supports me. I've never had a serious conversation with her about this though. I'm pretty quiet about it.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?
It hasn't. I was almost 30 pounds heavier when I met her and it never seemed to be a problem.

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?
I think she understands as much as a 110 pound girl with no history of ever having a weight problem can. I don't feel judged.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
Of course. On a good day I'll think "so I'm fat, there are worse things that I can be in this relationship," and on a bad day I'll think "what is she doing, dating a fat hog like me?" In my experiences so far, lesbians can be JUST as judgemental about weight and body, etc, as men.

How long have you been together?
6 months. It's still a very new relationship, but it seems to be going somewhere, and I'm very happy.

:lol: I totally agree and thought the same thing!

I don't mind answering at all..

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?
You know he would never openly say to me, "Hey you need to lose weight". Though I do know that he certainly wouldn't mind if I did/do. My wedding dress was a size 12 and am a long way from being that woman again. So, yes, I think he wants me to lose weight, but not just for vanity issues. I don't currently have any other health issues due to my weight, but had I kept on the same path I would have.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
My husband, for most of his life up until these past few years, has been a really skinny man. Now,he has actually gained weight but he still looks fine. I would say he is normal.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?
For a while I never let him know what my weight even was because I was so ashamed and bothered by it...and what do you know I leave this site up and one of my posts is on the screen and he sees my weight. I was so mortified. I mean, yes it's obvious that I weigh alot, but he never knew what it actually was!! We've talked before about me dieting and things like that, but really for I guess it is ultimately a non issue for us. He just wants me to be happy and he is very supportive of me no matter what.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life? It has really effected it for me because I am so self conscious. I just feel so ugly that I don't want to do anything.

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands? I don't feel that he judges me at all. He is really great about it.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
I feel self conscious all the time!! I am a work in progress though and I am working on how I view myself while I work on exterior too.

Oh and someone had asked us to put how long we have been together. My hubby and I have been together for 10 years, married 9 of them.

Alright, I´ll bite. We´ve been together for 1.5 years and we´re getting married sometime soon.

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?

Only because I want to lose weight. He asks me everyday if i went to the gym and i tell him when i lose weight, and he is proud.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?
He´s got the most adorable belly pooch. He´s on my profile pic.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?

We talk about it. He wants to lose the pooch so we´ve sort of come up with a plan together.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?

The weight really hasn´t affected it at all. But with both of us gettings these giant boosts of self-esteem...

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands? Definitely does not judge.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?
not especially. I´m much more self concious about the rashes that I get if I get bit by a mosquito.

Do you think your significant other wants you to lose weight?

he tells me to do what i want to do, he doesnt pressure me either way but i secretly think he doesnt want me to lose weight because he thinks i will change personality wise and leave him for someone else. which is not true.

Is he "normal" or also overweight?

he is also on the heavy side but i love my teddy bear.

Do either of you ever talk about your weight or is it a "non-issue" and never brought up?

i use to not bring it up at all because i was shy, until recently when i started to open up more with him about those things.

How has it affected your more, ahem, intimate life?

no, thats always been the same.

Do you feel he judges you for your weight, or do you think he understands?

i dont think he gets the female/weight aspect of it, the vanity we feel ect. he is completly lost and all he knows is that im losing weight.

Do you ever feel self-conscious?

all the time.