I wanna stay fat because.....
 

Ladies I found the funniest thread over at the Atkins forum. Instead of listing all the reasons why we want to lose weight it lists the reasons why you want to stay fat. In a sarcastic kind of a funny way. I thought we could use a little humor in our daily struggles, I hope you'll join me. We can keep adding to it when something pops in our heads. So I'll get it started.

I wanna stay fat because I love being terrified that I will break somebody's outdoor furniture.

I wanna stay fat because I love having only 3 stores to shop from and then greatly overpaying for my purchases.

I wanna stay fat because I love weighing more then my husband.

I wanna stay fat because I love going to the movies and having to get an end seat so that I have as much room as possible.

I wanna stay fat because it's so much fun not being able to climb a flight of stairs without fear of passing out.

I wanna stay fat because I'm thrilled that my underwear is jumbo sized, I mean who wants to wear itty, bitty underwear anyway? Certainly not Britney Spears.

That's it for now. But I'll be back.

Oh what fun......

I want to stay because I love getting on the plan and asking for the seatbelt extender.
I want to stay fat so I don't have to push the recliner back it will just fall like that do to my weight.
I want to stay fat so I don't have to worry about fashion and just pick what fits.

I wanna stay fat cause Grandma bras are just so gorgeous.

I wanna stay fat cause I don't really need to be comfortable when I tie my shoelaces.

I loved being fat, because when I put my bra on I had 4 boobs.

Love this!

Here goes:

I wanna stay fat because:

1) I LOVE the sound of the toilet seat C-R-A-C-K-I-N-G!!!

2) I can take up more space on this planet!

3) Rolls of fat are INTERESTING and CREATIVE!

4) I can make a bigger splash into the pool than the skinny people can!

5) I don't have to worry about having so many clothing choices, so I can actually SAVE money!

6) Slim ankles are overrated!

7) Who wants to be able to wear a watch anyway?

8) If there is another Ice Age I will survive REALLY WELL!

9) I enjoy being ignored!

10) I like it when people say, "You have SUCH a pretty face!"

Cheryl:?: :( :?:

This thread really made me laugh. Great idea Robin.

I want to stay fat becuase:

*I don't like wearing seatbelts on airplans (and am too embarassed to ask for the extender).
*I like having to have the arm up between seats on a plan so that I can fit.
*I like people saying I have a great personality.
*I like people telling me that I'm really smart.
*Stairs are very overrated.
*I can buy a thinner winter coat becuase I have more insulation.
*I can keep the heat lower in my apartment because I have more insulation.
*If I fall it hurts less because I have more padding.

(And on a side not I am really excited to fly in 3 weeks becuase I think the seatbelt will fit and I wont have to have the arm up between me and my sis. I think she will be very suprised!)

I wanna stay fat because I love it when little kids ask me if I'm pregnant!!

This is a good one - good idea starting one over here.

- I want to be fat because I love taking a chance of injury every time I sit in a lawn chair.

- I want to be fat because I love the feeling of being shoehorned into a seat at Senator's games.

- I want to be fat because I like sweating profusely at the hint of exertion.

I wanna stay fat so I can still look like an overstuffed sausage in my high school sweatpants.

I wanna stay fat so my threats of sitting on my nieces and nephews carries more (ack, what a pun) weight. :D

:D You are all hysterical!!! LMAO :lol:

I want to stay fat because I love panting while shaving my legs.
I want to stay fat because I love having a wider waist than my six foot tall father.
For that matter I want to stay fat because I love having no defined waist at all.
I want to stay fat because stretch marks are the new tan lines.

I want to stay fat because there is no bigger high than successfully maneuvering my overweight body through a crowded restaurant or shop. It’s like a living maze puzzle and I love puzzles!!!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Oh my gosh these are sooo funny. And yet oh so motivating. Keep em coming, keep em coming.

I wanna stay fat just in case the mall calls me that they need someone to replace their Santa Claus.

I wanna stay fat because I love taking up a seat and a half on public transportation and that oh so wonderful sense of humiliation that comes along with it.

I wanna stay fat so that when George Clooney comes knocking at my door he won't be tempted to seduce me, therefore saving me from an adulturous affair and wrecking my 21 year marriage.

I wanna stay fat so that people can describe me easily - using words like "heavy-set," "chubby," "chunky" and "plump" as the FIRST word to describe me.

I wanna stay fat because I love when people underestimate me! Of course I can't dance, swim, or bike - I'm fat!

I want to stay fat because it's so much fun looking for the biggest size on the rack, and still wondering if it's going to fit.

I love asking the flight attendant for an extender. It's really fun when she comes swinging it down the row and whirls it out for the world to see.

I want to stay fat because I love living dangerously by not wearing a seat belt that won't fit.

I want to stay fat because two chins are always better than one!

I want to stay fat because I LOVE that swish sound that your inner thighs make when you wear corduroys (sp?)

I want to stay fat because back cleavage is sexy.

I want to stay fat because I can almost take flight if I flap my arms fast enough.

I want to stay fat because I'm the one that boosts all my skinny friends' egos.

and last but not least..... I want to stay fat because I don't have dimples on my face, so I figure I might as well have them on my butt!!

Thanks for the thread.... it's made me laugh.....

I want to stay fat because health scares keep my life exciting!

I want to stay fat because who wants to sit at a booth in a restaurant?!

I want to stay fat because I hear shapeless clothes are all the rage this winter.

I want to stay fat because I like a little mystery in my day (Will I be able to get off that extra low couch? Will I fit through that turnstile? What piece of my wardrobe will be joining most of my clothes in the "will fit again someday" section of the closet?)

I want to stay fat because I've been this way so long, I'm really getting the hang of it!

I want to stay fat because I love the looks people give me in a restaurant, like I don't deserve to eat!

I want to stay fat because I don't really need to see my feet to know they're there!

I want to stay fat because I love standing behind everyone in pictures!

LOLOL :lol:

I wanna stay fat because MY legs make that sound WITHOUT wearing cords, or any pants at all!:barf:

Linda

I want to stay fat because I love squeezing myself into "shaping" undergarments to try to look normal.

I want to stay fat because I love not being able to find pants that fit.

I want to stay fat because I love the pain in my knees. It reminds me I'm alive!

I want to stay fat because I love worrying if I'm disturbing my downstairs neighbors when I walk in my apartment.

I want to stay fat because I enjoy being fatter than my fiance (who is 4" taller).

I want to stay fat because I enjoy being the fattest person in the room.

Just had to say thanks for the laughs.:rofl: I really needed that.

I love the comments about the cords. I was telling a girl at work that I don't wear cords because I don't want to start a fire.

I want to stay fat because I like not knowing if I have a belly button or not.

I want to stay fat because I like having to grab onto the furniture so that I can get up from the floor if I sit there too long.

That is a great one!! Skinny people worry about what their husbands will think of them without makeup on..... fat people think about what their husbands will think of them without their body shapers on!!

What motivation!

I want to stay fat to help save water in the bathtub. More of me in the tub uses less water to fill the tub. When I take a bath I like it hot as I can stand it and as full as I can get it.

Oooh... I've got another one.

I want to stay fat because I love the "sock line" I have on my ankles after I take off my socks.

I wanna stay fat because I like wearing out the shocks in my car.
I wanna stay fat because baggy spandex clothes are overrated.
I wanna stay fat because I like getting stuck in dressing rooms with a dress stuck over my head. (yes, that happened to me!)
I wanna stay fat because I like the nervous looks people get when they see me at a buffet.

Oo oh, one more:
I wanna stay fat because I love panty hose that doesn't fit. It really thrills me when the crotch won't go higher than my knees and I'm worried I'll fall over.

I though of some more. Also I NEVER realized how many other people had the same problems with flying and seatbelts as I do. Wow. I’m actually excited to see the shocked look on my sisters face when we fly this winter and I don’t have to put the arm rest between us up because I can fit into the seat and that I can comfortable put my own seatbelt on without an extender! (Or at least that is what I am hoping for)

* I like being fat because then people don’t ask me or assume I had weightloss surgery. (Not that I’m apposed to other people getting the surgery but it bothers me that people only assume I can lose weight though surgery.)
* I wanna stay fat because I like the looks I get from waiters/waitress. If I order a burger and fries then the that’s why you’re fat look and if I order a salad with fat free dressing the who are you trying to fool look.
* I wanna stay fat because I like struggling to put seatbelts on in the car.
* I wanna stay fat because I like everyone assuming any health problems I have are a direct result of my obesity.
* I wanna stay fat because I enjoy going to three stores to try and find a winter coat and then just settling on whatever fits.
* I wanna stay fat because I enjoy paying extra money for clothing.

I feel that too. I wonder how much is my own embarrassment of ordering healthy foods at my size, rather than them giving me a look ("projecting" in psycho-speak). I think I don't want people to know I'm trying. Yet again. I get the same urge to hide when I'm buying a load of healthy stuff at the market or excercising in public. I imagine they're thinking, "Honey, whatever you're doing, it ain't working." I SOOO need to stop worrying about what other people think. It's dumb and the rational side of me says that they don't care!

I wanna stay fat because if I get caught in a blizzard, I'll need the fuel to keep my alive.

I wanna stay fat because it's so flattering to get a sweater for Christmas that's even bigger than I am. "Gee, honey, I thought you were a size frillion."

I loved being fat because my 47 inch waist was so sexy.
I loved to hear the sexy grunt when I would sit on my husbands lap.
I loved that getting into a pair of jeans was exercise in itself.
I loved wearing granny panties and long flannel gowns.
I loved that my wardrobe had so few of clothes to choose from.
I especially loved to run into my DH's ex-wife when she had lost 100 lbs. and I was almost 100 lbs. overweight.
I loved going to my son's high school football games and me beiing sweating worse than the players.
I loved having other people stare at my plate when we went out to eat.

I love being fat because it's fun to guess at where my 'bikini line' is when shaving due to the fact that I haven't seen it in 8 years.

I love being fat because having shorts that ride up in public is super sexy!

I love being fat because it's great to hear the GYN say "You really should lose weight." while in the middle of the dreaded exam. :o

I love being fat because I would have never found these message boards and all you super cool people if I were skinny!!! :D

Never mind why I love being fat, I LOVE all of you. It is amazing that I can relate to EVERY SINGLE THING THAT WAS WRITTEN HERE, EVERY SINGLE THING. And I had totally given up on flying that's how petrified I was of the dreaded seat belt extender and not fitting into that teeny tiny seat. It's been about 12 or 13 years since I've flown. But maybe, just maybe one day soon.........

I love being fat cause hey what gal wouldn't love being the same weight as professional athletes, think NFL linebackers, NBA centers.

I love being fat so that my husband can sleep at night knowing that his wife will always be faithful.

I love being fat so that when a wedding invitation comes I don't need to worry about buying something new and spending a lot of money.

I love being fat for that oh so special look I get when I go to get my haircut and the girl wonders how she's gonna hoist me up in the chair.

I love being fat cause hey who needs a pair of sexy knee-high boots anyway.

I wanna stay fat because when all my friends are talking about going clothes shopping I actually like feeling like I wanna curl up and die.

I wanna stay fat because I love hearing, "but you don't seem to eat that much"

I wanna stay fat because when the streets are icy I love being terrified that I will slip and fall and G-d forbid break something, that 6 men will have to lift me up. 6 professional athletes that is (see above, you know the NFL linemen and the NBA centers).

That's actually a really good point...as I've thought about it I've realized that while I miss out on alot being fat there are actually a few things that have been if not positive then not totally negative about it....Like all of You!

of course as long as I have you all already...Id like to someday see my bikini line...maybe have someone else see it too.

OK these are fantastic!!!

I have been seriously disturbing my dog's sleep while I keep bursting out in laughter!!!!

-I like being fat because my belly takes away from the enormity of my bustline.

-I wanna stay fat because I love sitting naked in a changeroom crying.

-I like being fat because I love the looks of fear from the salesgirls when I go into regular sized clothing stores. Or better yet when they pretend like they don't see you squeezing between the racks. (I sometimes walk through stores as motivation)

These are all so awesome!! I resonate with all of them.

:D I used to tell DH when we went hiking that if I fell and broke an ankle he'd have to leave me behind to die because there was NO WAY he was getting me out of there!!

I wanna stay fat because I love having little kids tell me I'm really huge!

I wanna stay fat because I love not being able to sit on the floor for more than five minutes to play with my nieces and my friend's DD's and DS's.

I wanna stay fat because I love picking out clothes with an "X" after the size number.

I wanna stay fat because I love not fitting comfortably in the passenger seat of my DH's car.

I wanna stay fat because I love having my fat overlap on other people on airplanes.

Thanks for this Robin, very therapeutic! :hug:

Best. Thread. Ever. :rofl:


I wanna stay fat because I'm hard to kidnap!! Ain't nobody grabbing my fat butt off the street and stuffing it into a van.

I love being fat, because chub-rub is my favorite feeling.

I love being fat, because being single is AWESOME. Ditto to having 0 confidence to flirt with men. Ditto always being the third wheel. Ditto being told you should lower your standards.

I wanna stay fat because stretch marks are HOT. Seriously, they're the new body art.

BWAHAHA!!! Seriously coffee just went everywhere! :lol3:

These are great!

I love being fat so that the only shoes I buy are slip on shoes so I won't have to try and move my belly out of the way to put on shoes.

I love being fat when I go to a play/movies because I LOVE the feeling of my hip/thighs rubbing up against a stranger when we are sitting in the seats :o

I love being fat because I love going shopping for clothes that were cut from the same pattern as my two man tent.

Fashion is sooo expensive and always changing!
Sweats are timeless ... and cheap!

I love dwarfing my school friends in all prom photos

It's fashionable to look like a whale in taffeta...