Sick of it all... hopefully temporary!
 

I so struggled yesterday. I don't know where this came from, but for much of yesterday, I was just sick of all of this. Sick of the calorie counting and the weighing the food and counting exercise and, just doing it everyday. I've logged almost every morsel of food that I've eaten since last AUGUST and I sometimes just don't want to think about it anymore.

And yet, I was too terrified to chuck it totally and go completely off plan... I did eat more than I usually do, but I didn't go totally bonkers, chose what I would eat, and even still had a small calorie deficit for the day.

At least for now I'm feeling much better -- I often do feel better the next day when things like that happen. But I still don't know why that happened yesterday. It wasn't TOM, it wasn't hunger, didn't seem to be stress... it just was. And while I've had thoughts of being "sick of it" before, this was the worst yet. I hope I can get back into the mental groove, cause I WAS in such a good place just a week ago!

Again, I'm fine today and mostly posting this because it helps me to see that other people have successes AND struggles on this journey...

Heather..

As you know I don't count calories.. I can't count them and don't want to count them.. but it is working for you. Is it an option to just not do it for a day when you get frustrated like this yet still stay within your plan.. then go back to counting?

I would tell you to just chuck it.. that it is not necessary but I know that it probably is for you. It would be like asking me not to record my exercise. I know EXACTLY where that would lead me.. thinking that I HAD exercised today when really that was yesterday.. or thinking I'd exercised hard when all I did was take a short walk. I know cause I've been there.

Take a deep breath, hon.. pick up the journal. Dust it off.. and plug along. You've come so far .. and though the journey might change.. it will not end.

:hug:

It's funny, but I was thinking of this very phenomenon early last week- on Monday I is was pretty much in the same place, though in my case TOM was at least part of the issue.

I didn't want to monitor my eating, I didn't wan't to go to the gym... in fact what I wanted to do was go buy a bag of potato chips (and by bag I don't mean any of those silly little single portion ones, I meant BAG) and sit, watch TV, and eat that bag one chip after another until they were gone. I got as far as standing in the chip isle, looking at the nutrition info on the bags to pick "the best chips" :lol: when I realized that I wasn't going to be buying any of them and walked away. (whew!) Even though I had found that strength, I was still whinning to myself a bit about not getting them. :rolleyes:

People talk about being in touch with their inner child- well I'm pretty convinced that my inner child is suffering from an advanced case of the "terrible two's". There is just this part of ourselves that is always testing us, trying to see just how strict we are- how strong the rules will hold- and it can be pretty bratty when it doesn't get it's way.

Glad to see you're feeling much better.
I just wanted to say that I have read a lot of your posts and I really look up to you for all of the advice that you offer others.
I want to let you know that by reading this post I have a great deal of respect for you. You have proven that although your accomplishments have been huge, you have off days too.
We all know that the journey is long and hard and your going to have days when you just want to give up. You didn't and I respect you for that.
Thanks for being such an inspiration for me and keep your chin up,today is a new day.


Andoreth-Love the analogy about the terrible two's. I find that I act very similar to my 2 yr old sometimes. Kinda sad isn't it?

I had a day like this on Saturday, but mine was totally a PMS day.

Sometimes when this sick-of-it-all feeling strikes me, it's about all areas of my life - sick of living in my home, driving the same streets, shopping the same stores, talking to the same people, etc. I haven't found a good way to deal with it yet, except for to let my mind get quiet and wait for the mood to pass.

Maybe when we get totally sick of recording things, maybe that's the time we most need to record them. I didn't record everything religiously until I started plateauing and I wanted to jump-start some weight loss again. I also naturally became curious about meeting my nutritional needs and started using fitday.

Sometimes I get sick of it all as well and you can let yourself wander a bit as long as you know that you can't stray too long. I know you are getting close to goal but maybe you should allow yourself one day a week where you don't have to count or weigh or do whatever you do. I am not saying go all out and eat whatever you want but just allow yourself to eat your normal foods but don't worry about the individual calories for one moment.

Wyllenn -

I'm sorry you had a tough day yesterday and I'm glad you're feeling better now. I hope it helps you to know that YOU have been one of my biggest inspirations since I joined the forum earlier this month.

I think it's natural to have a "I DON'T want to do this anymore" day during this process. I sometimes think "This is a lot of work and why should a simple thing like eating BE so much work?" And when we see that others are not doing/don't need to do the same work and seem to be doing fine (people w/o weight problems, I mean), well, it's frustrating. In a way, it's like someone going through rehab for an injury. They have to work so hard just to get back to normal and most have days when they are SICK of their exercises, even though following through will ultimately be in their best interest.

I'm with Jayde in that I don't and emphatically do not want to count calories or weigh/measure my food. This is primarily because I know that is something I would/could not keep up with for the rest of my life and it's been stressed here over and over to start and stick with things you feel you can do "forever." Since weighing, measuring and calore counting has obviously worked so well for you, I imagine you'd want to stick with it although there's something to be said for trying new approaches if you're in a rut. There's also something to be said for taking a break from it all - I did - although of course you'll take much longer to reach your goal.

Take it easy on yourself and keep coming here for support!

Heather, I'm glad you're feeling better today. But the good thing is that even feeling the way you did, you still had a calorie deficit and didn't go wild. I had a somewhat similar day. DH is in the hospital recovering from surgery and the options in the cafeteria are really bad - Fried foods and white stuff - potatoes, rice, mac and cheese. It was really a case of having to choose from the least of the bad foods. Then afterwards, it seemed to go downhill. But today's a new day and I'm back on plan. - Now if the scale would only start moving again......

Wow. I love this place. I wasn't necessarily looking for support, but I got so much of it. AND, perhaps some insights I can use...

Jayde and Nelie -- I think further on down I'm going to want to do what you suggested and not log everything. In fact, I don't think I want to record everything for the rest of my life. I didn't even want to do it before I started, but it has been more useful for me than I ever thought possible. I see a future where I don't log everything, but some days do it to make sure I'm not getting too complacent, or do it if I start to get off track.

My husband doesn't log everything every day, but right now, I feel like I should keep doing it. I was okay letting myself eat a little more, but I feel like I still need this "tool" or "crutch" or whatever it is to keep me honest.

And I'm not sure that it's the LOGGING that's the root of the problem. I think even if I didn't log I would mentally track everything... and I am not ready to give myself free rein. I know it works for others, but I just see it for me as a slippery slope to a lack of control. So, for now, I will log.

But as Nelie suggested, I am cutting myself some slack in general. I know I could lose faster if I cut my calories further, but I have decided to just continue to strive for 1 pound/week, or maybe less, and keep my calories where they are. It's not even a meal a week, but could be a treat a week if I planned carefully. Last week, the homemade strawberry shortcake was worth it!

I actually still eat an average of 1800 cals/day (for now anyway). So I don't feel I limit myself like some of you do! There's plenty of space there for some treats, so I don't think I'm depriving myself much. It's more the constant monitoring that gets to me.

Jen-- I think you're onto something with the terrible twos. It felt like a part of me acting out... just like a bratty kid who doesn't want to do what a parent says. That was, I think, a big reason why I didn't want to fully give in to that. I think it's a bad idea to just give that 2 year old inside me what she wants just because she wants it or is having a bad day. I wasn't as strict with her as most days, but I didn't want to give in to her.

I HAVE had days where I was more lenient with my eating, and I was fine with those choices. Mostly they are days where I'm out with people, maybe eating out or with the opportunity to have things I normally don't. For example, last week my husband and I sampled a number of different lovely olive oils (using fresh sourdough to dip!). I went a little high in calories that day, but there was, in my mind, a good reason, and I enjoyed it very much! I'm fine doing that.

Yesterday I just felt... petulant? whiny? And I didn't want to fully give in to that. Good catch. And good job with those chips!

Angel33 -- Yep, it IS a new day, and I am feeling stronger! And I do have to remind myself that we ALL have off days. I think if I felt I was immune to that, THAT would be a problem. I think we all have them.

phantastica -- you know, you're onto something too... I am feeling a little sick-of-it-all. In fact, on Saturday, while my eating was fine, I felt really restless with staying home with the same old same old choices. Hubby and I got out and about a bit, and it was nice, but maybe not enough. Perhaps yesterday was a part of that feeling...

BreakingFree -- boy, yeah, is this like rehab sometimes. And we probably need to continue our rehab forever. Sometimes I'm okay with that, but some times... feels like a drag. And that 2 year old comes out and whines...

Like I said above, I don't see myself logging food forever, but feel the need to keep doing it now. I really admire those of you doing it without logging... I feel sometimes like logging is my "training wheals." On the other hand, one reason I really like it is for the info I get out of the process. Plusses and minuses, I suppose.

I remember reading early on here another poster discuss a struggle eating fast food... one which the poster "lost"... and posting it for all of us to see. I so admired that... this person had been very successful, and it was easy to think everything was easy, but it wasn't. It SO helped me to know that people could be successful and struggle too. It makes the struggle seem more "normal" and helped me anticipate that such things would happen to me too. It also helped to know that you COULD get back on track after that. So, maybe I'm just passing on inspiration? I dunno.

Thanks for all your responses! And boy, I wrote a novel in response!

Tammy -- and not to mention the stress of a loved one going through surgery... probably makes you less motivated to plan ahead, huh? Hope your DH is okay! And good to hear you're back on track! I think that's just what we have to do. Get back on track!

I think I'll continue to log for a while, but I know that I won't be a fitday geek for the rest of my life. I'm using it now until I can "memorize" what good nutrition and 1800 calories or less feels like. I was successful losing weight without logging for the first 60 pounds, and now I'm using it as a way to shake things up, to keep my weight loss interesting.

Oh - here's what helps me on the sick-of-it-all days: either journaling, getting in the car and going somewhere I haven't been before, or taking a nap. :)

Phantastica -

When I have days like this, when I'm just tired and bored of the "sameness" of everthing, I do something to, what I call, "shake up my brain" or get some "newness" in my life. Like you mentioned above, one strategy is to drive to some neighborhood or area (I love driving in the country) to see things I haven't before. I might also go into a new store, try a new restaurant or something along those lines. If it gets really bad, that's when I know I need a weekend trip or a vacation! I feel by "shaking up my brain" I get a new perspective on things and feel refreshed. Highly recommended!

I only logged for a couple of weeks right at the beginning. It just made me even more obsessed with food than I was. I hated doing it, so I stopped. I kinda have an old fashioned weight watchers exchange system in my head. Two to three servings of fruit 3 to 4 servings of carbs, two servings of protein, unlimited veggies and about 200 calories of "treats". That broad sort of system works for me most of the time.

I must say, if I didn't have a week off here and there, I would go mad. I get so sick of thinking about weight. So I have had a bit of a cruise this year, where I have certainly lost inches, and worked on my fitness, but not really lost much weight to speak of.

You have done so well, and are so focussed, I am in awe.

Oh and I have an inner three year old in my head. I have always said I have a brat alive and well and fighting every step of the way!

I certainly know there are days when I wake up in the morning and for whatever reason I just don't want to go to work. I don't mean the "I hate my job" not wanting to go to work (for the most part I really like my job), but the "I just don't feel like it today" not going to work. I think we can all relate to that. For the most part we groan, fuss a bit and then get ourselves out of bed and off to work. The price of not going is too high - people depend on us, we depend on the paycheck, etc.

I think it is the same thing with weight loss. In many ways it is work. It doesn't mean you don't want to do it most of the time, that you don't realize the value it has in your life, etc. There are just going to be days you don't want to do it. Hopefully we can approach it with a similar attitude - allow ourselves a bit of a grumble and then get on with it.

Of course there are the few occasional times with work that a grumble won't do and I need to take a "mental health day". I suppose maybe diets need that too.

heh. I think many of you are right. I think I DO need a mental health day. In fact, I know I do. I was thinking about a spa day...

Also, while that feeling of wanting to chuck everything is gone today, I think it could be back, soon, so I may also need a mental break from watching everything I eat. A short break. I also may just try eating a little more each day and giving myself a bit of leeway for a while. Not enough to gain, but maybe not worry about losing. I am terrified of not being able to get back the focus, tho, either way. Yes, I've been successful, but I've been successful by being focused. I'm not sure I know how to do it any other way.

I have a sort of vacation in a couple of weeks and I may choose to not log food then and see what happens. That may work because it might be easier to pick it up when I get back. On the other hand, the trip is likely to be stressful, and may trigger binges. hmmm.

Well, this is life, and I think I have to figure out how to deal with food AND life. Like Nancy said, I may not WANT to go to work all the time, but I do. Same thing here. I can take a bit of a break but can't afford to lose this job!

I really think shakin' it up a bit and taking a few risks (not logging for a spell) might prove beneficial in the long run. I know my attention span is fiercely limited...lol (sorta) I was absolutely inflexible early on, then got bored and took the big dive into exercise. I upped my calories and increased my exercise (quite a bit) and then............plateaued for nearly a month. Huh...? The wonderful thing is my body has tightened and is much stronger and energetic. I wouldn't know this if I hadn't done this "change" nor would I have figured out how to get past it, which I have. yet another change. Your life's weigh loss/maintenance path will be full of this stuff. I think its better to try and sort it out now rather than later. Oh and Wyllen....Your still my Hero!

You might be right about shaking things up. I'm not sure how yet, but I think I do need to do something... let's see how it goes!

Oh, as far as starting to change a little when you go on vacation as a break.. I think if that were the plan you should start 2 days BEFORE you actually go on vacation. 2 days of being on plan though you don't log so that when you do leave it won't feel that much different.. Not a freefor all.. :D which is what I might tend to make it if I changed something too quickly in a different environment.

Heather.. whatever you do... make sure you stick around here!

Wow I sure hear you, Heather. In fact I haven't even been posting since I'm so bummed at this stuff. Actually I don't at ALL mind sticking with my plan since I am enjoying my new eating style; I just want to see some results. And I am SO sick of this record breaking heat we are having... I just don't do well in hot weather and am only getting in a fraction of my exercise because of it.

Hang in there! You are doing great and some "down" days are part of the game. :) You are such an encouragement to the rest of us!!

Try not counting and measuring. By now you know what a true portion looks like since you have been doing this for a year. If you feel like it is not working make yourself go back to it. You are pretty close to the 179 goal and I think like Stevi said shaking it up is not a bad thing.

If you read the Body for Life book he actually tells you to stick to his program for 6 days and then relax on the seventh. I know that is not what you are talking about exactly but in the weight loss journey many of us are finding our own way and style.

In the beginning of being on this board I was (am still am) in awe of all the success I see. I used to ask people the age old question of "How did you do it?" I know it would work ofr me somewhat but I had to go to the little old WW points for it to work for me.

Basically....try it....if you feel ok with it then Keep on! :carrot: :carrot: You are awesome with all your hard work. :carrot: :carrot: Maintenance and the last few pounds from what I have read are always the toughest.

I too, am suffering from "sick of it all." I am tired of always having to be mindful of my exercise, my water, my food. I wish I could be like most and be able to live their life without WEIGHT being foremost in their mind and on their thoughts. I get discouraged and exhausted knowing that I will have TO DO THIS FOREVER!!!!! I just don't want to anymore. It's too hard.

Here's what my mom would say about sick-of-it-all .... You need to make a list of everything for which you have to be thankful! hahaha. Love ya, Mom, but I was looking for someone to share my misery. :)

There is a grain of truth to that, though. I try to wake up every day and thank my Higher Power that I've been given the insight and desire to act in ways that make me healthy, and that I am sixty pounds lighter than I was last October as a result of that.

I don't think much about what I have to do 'forever'. All I care about is what I have to do today, to make it work for me today. That is different from what worked for me six months ago, and which is different from what worked for me three months ago.

I am prepared to be mindful of my exercise, water, and food forever. I know there is no getting around that. But "how" I am mindful might change. Sure I'd like to be like family members who don't seem to have to be so mindful.. sure I'd like to throw whatever I want in my shopping cart... sure I'd like to be able to take the treadmill and other exercise stuff out of my house and use that room for something else.. but I can't and I won't.. because I know what I have to do for the rest of my life and I do it the best I can each day. :hug:

Sometimes I will write down the foods I eat (so it is still visual) but not log them until I am ready (usually reserved for vacations). So for a week I still have a visual reminder but I also have a vacation from fitday logging. I don't write down the info that goes with each food (unless I think I won't be able to find it through research later). I just write and go on. I don't recommend this everyday because we underestimate calories (and all the other junk) all the time. I was on vacation so I knew I wasn't completely on track. Sure enough my avg was 2200 cal. That's too high. It was comforting to know that not all days were blown and that it wasn't 3000 or something so it still served its purpose but I didn't feel like I was glued to logging or even dieting (since I gave myself some permission on vacation). I didn't gain anything but didn't lose anything. Not bad.

Sometimes when the dieting thing gets tiring and old I chat with a diet buddy I have. Or go somewhere and treat myself so I can remind myself that life is for living. A trip to Barnes and Nobles bookstore (by myself), walking all day at an outlet mall, treating myself to a low calorie smoothie, etc are good ways to clear your mind and feel a bit more refreshed. I stopped for 4 months because of grief and now I'm struggling to get back fully on track but I feel good knowing I've taken those steps and I'm celebrating my NSVs more than I did in the past. This is for life so aim for progress, not perfection.

A question for BreakingFree and others who do not count calories
 

Hi,

I was wondering if you could give me guidance as to how you have had success at the weight loss thing. I had read some posts where people had mentioned that they do not count calories. As was mentioned in one post ~ it is stressed that you should pick something you can stick with for the rest of your life.

Back along, I had some success and was about 1/2 way to my goal. I did it by counting calories. Then I "fell off the wagon" ~ I have been struggling ever since. I start with good intentions and last for a time ~ sometimes just a short time, sometimes longer. When I try to imagine myself counting calories for the rest of my life, I just can not see myself doing that. I am not a very disciplined person ~ that is probably part of the problem.

But.....if others out there have had success without the counting, it must be possible ~ please share with me how you go about it.

I need and want to do this, but haven't been able to find a way that works for me so far.

Thank you for your help.

Hi Glynne (aka Gayle :) ).. I think it is not exactly right for me to give advice.... since I am not anywhere near successful at maintaining.. but there are many who are.. the plans for not counting are

1. just eating "clean" and exercising.. what clean means and what exercise is different for many people

2. following something more structured like the Sonoma diet (a great way to move into Mediterranean IMHO (there is a nice active Sonoma forum on 3FC with some great ladies)

3. Mediterranean or Asian diets... and here I don't mean diet in the sense of a weightloss plan per se.. but the diets of these areas (There is a Med forum on 3FC not very active.. but supportive..)

There are many of us all over the place!

There are lots of good ideas here.. phantastica's mom is right to focus on what we are thankful for -- boy where's my list?

And I like thinking about the notion that HOW I am mindful can change. I think for long term success, that is something I am going to have to really think about. I was hoping to make it a little closer to my goal (and a little further from the 200s) before I started shaking things up more, but if I keep feeling like I did the other day, I may start sooner.

I think I was rebelling against the notion of being mindful forever. Yet, I am mindful of my money all the time, and it doesn't bother me. I think the difference is I have a better sense of how to spend my money and keep out of trouble (debt), but don't yet know how to spend my calories and keep out of trouble (decent weight). I guess I feel like I could go further into debt again -- after all, I'm not out of "weight debt" yet!

Oops Heather ~ I didn't mean to make that post on your thread. I was trying to start a thread and messed up ~ sorry.

What a wonderful way to look at it. For people who have been in debt and GOT OUT OF IT...they had to do something to get themselves out (not counting those that got handouts from family or whatever). They had to learn to dig themselves out. Either they learned how to manage money OR they fell right back in the same hole. Debt can always sneak up on us, but for some it is a matter of treating it like a lesson. For that matter, just like money management it is always a lesson we are learning, a strategy we are trying, manipulating we are doing, etc. Same with "weight debt." It's not a "we got out of debt and we are done" game. I love that analogy. Thanks!

Gayle -- Not a problem!

I'm glad it helps you too! I use a lot of money and budgeting analogies and they seem to help me. For example, each day my calorie limit is like a budget. I can spend it on what I want, but can't go over budget regularly, or else face that 'weight debt'. And you might even be able to take it further. I CAN spend my money on whatever I want, but if I choose to buy an expensive car and have no money left over to pay the mortgage, that's a problem. Similarly with food, if I choose to eat all my calories in ice cream, other nutritional 'bills' won't get paid (like veggies).

Wyllenn -

Are you still feeling "sick of it all" or was it just temporary ;) ?

Mary

heh. good question. Yesterday and today I'm feeling mostly back on track in that I'm fine logging and monitoring again. I'm not feeling openly resentful any more, which is good!

But in the back of my mind now is the notion that I am not stuck doing exactly what I am doing forever. The real benefit I've gained from this thread and the resulting introspection is the notion that while I need to be mindful, HOW I am mindful may change. So I've started playing around with those notions. I have to say, just the notion it self that it CAN change has been really helpful! And people had lots of good ideas about things I could shift around.

So, when I get a little further from the 200s and closer to my next goal (or so) I may play with the idea of not counting calories (and eveyrthing else) but monitoring some other way. And I may be back here to strategize about that!

I am also thinking about a spa day or some other reward/mental health release!

So, thanks for asking!

I had one blissful period of weight loss (on Weight Watchers) where it actually DID become so much of a habit that I didn't have to track and just had to be "careful" -- i.e., only one slice of bread in a restaurant, fruit or sherbet for dessert instead of the hot fudge Sunday. WW used exchanges then, so it really taught you how to eat properly, and I had about ten dinners and five breakfasts that I rotated (lunch was always a sandwich and fruit). I would do anything to get back to that! That's what I'm working towards: really CHANGING so that I don't feel as though I'm giving up anything. I'm not nearly there yet, but it's a dream :)

Wyllenn, I hope the rebellion has run its course :) You're doing so well. I always gave up (not that I thought of it that way) when I was about 15 or 20 pounds from goal, because I was comfortable at that weight. No longer REALLY FAT! but certainly not where I should be. (You're much more sensible, I'm sure.)

... I remember this, and I agree. It did teach how to eat properly. I'm sure points are a quick fix and more accomodating to the different eating styles (low-carb, low-fat, etc.), but I think the exchanges helped me tremendously.

I did WW a couple of times years ago and liked the exchanges. In fact, before I had any kind of plan in place, I kind of went back in there in my head and used that general system for a while.

Xan, I've wondered too if it's not something about getting close to a goal and just having reached a major goal...

I may have spoken too soon! I had a tough night and ate more tonight. I'm eating for a 200-300 cal deficit, but usually I'm >500. I wouldn't worry but I feel kind of out of control (today I wanted to eat everything again) and am up a couple of pounds. I'd wonder if it was TOM but that should be weeks away. I wonder if losing a lot of weight screws with hormones?? I've been lucky so far and not really had TOM cravings or much bloating, but this feels like what a lot of people describe.

I am just going to ride this out. I know intellectually that I haven't gained a couple of pounds, even though I've eaten a little more I should still have a deficit, and nutridiary has done a great job of being accurate about how much I should lose, based on my eating and exercise.

But I am definitely not in as good a groove right now! Perhaps for a lot of reasons...

Wyllenn -

Hang in there! I think a rough patch or two is part of the process of finding what works best for us. I think Meg, Her Majesty of Maintenance (:queen:), does say something about hormones being a factor, although I can't point you to the exact post.

Moods can be mysterious and, while I'm a big advocate of exploring why you're feeling what you're feeling about food at any given moment (esp. if the feelings are overwhelming), sometimes I just have to say "I don't know why I'm feeling irritated/lethargic/angry/unmotivated/(fill in the blank)" and just go with the feeling without giving in to it and to my urge to assuage it with food (MUCH easier said than done, I know! :()

You'll figure it out. Some people muscle through it, some people take a break from losing and maintain, some people seek out new tools to carry them forward. Be open to exploring new sources of support and, most of all, be kind to yourself while you struggle. You've accomplished amazing things and should feel very, very proud :hug: !

Thanks!! I really appreciate all that advice! I am not giving up or giving in (much!). I am still eating well and exercising -- I'm just eating a little more than usual.I am pleased I haven't binged or gone nuts!

I don't have a plan -- yet -- for dealing with this. I also want to see if it lasts or disappears. But it helps so much to know how normal these kinds of ups and downs are!

Wyllenn, I have had times when I felt the same exact way. Many of us who have been trying to lose weight for an extended period of time probably feel this way at times. It seems to me that every few months I would start to feel like this. I just didn't want to have to be so accountable. The feeling usually passed after a day or two. I knew that losing weight was the right thing for me to do, but staying on track was harder. I didn't totally give in, but like you, I ate more than I usually did during these hard days. You just hit a major milestone and it may have you rethinking your hard-earned decisions. You have done excellent and I look forward to your insightful posts. I just wanted you to know that what you are feeling is normal. Sometimes I hate the thought of journaling my carbs daily and my exercise. I might miss one day and then I am right back at it. Good luck and take care.

Lily -- Thanks for letting me know how normal this feeling is! Sometimes that really helps (and also helps to know it can pass!). I think you're right that it is linked to a major milestone as well!

It has felt very good to give myself a little break, though sad that the scale's up a bit. I know it will eventually come back down if I keep in control!

I read or heard once on some weight loss program or message board (can't remember where/when exactly) this idea: Don't settle for chubby. It really resonated with me, because I have a certain point when I lose weight where I have frequently stumbled, stalled, reversed, whatever in the past. For me, it is a particular weight where I start to not really feel fat, but just feel a little chubby or round. Still a little heavy, but acceptable. At that point I have little to no restrictions on activities, I start to fit into clothes from non-plus-size stores, etc.

I don't know if that is what is going on with you right now, but I do think it seems reasonable to have a little bit of a letdown after reaching a milestone like you just have. I don't have a ton to add to the great comments and thoughts in this thread so far, but I just wanted to encourage you to continue on, whether that means a little relaxing on things for a period of time, or gathering up and marching on. I really believe you will be fine with whatever you do in the long run, as long as it is a conscious decision. :)

-Sara