[taekwondomom]

Been having issues with sleeping in too late. DH has been super about getting up with the kids and letting me sleep in but I've sleeping until noon or later! Then by the time I do my exercise for the day and have breakfast its already 2pm and I have very little time to get housework done before its time to make dinner and get the kids bathed and off to bed. Then I can't get to sleep until after 2-3 am and the whole cycle repeats itself. AAAAAAAAGH! I'm so frustrated with myself!

Getting up early will make my day so much more productive! It's just getting to bed at a reasonable hour (like in between 11pm and midnight) then in the morning, getting my butt out of my comfy, soft bed! Feels so luxurious to lounge in bed all relaxed, cozy and comfy, especially after working hard all weekend. And I love relaxing by hangin' out on the computer or watching movies for an hour or two after the kids are in bed or I get home from work. Unfortunately, I usually don't get home from work until midnight and that really throws my sleep schedule off kilter.
But then when I do get up there sit all the dirty clothes that need to be washed and put away, the piles of dirty dishes in the sink that DH neglected to wash over the weekend while I was working, the picking up and general tidying that have to be done before the filthy floors can be vacuumed or mopped. It drives me NUTS! I have to point out however, that DH has been more of a help since he regained his energy, although even before chemo he wasn't too great at helping around the house. He will do stuff like wash dishes but only if asked. And I get tired of asking him for help all the time when I feel it should be obvious I need help!!! After all there are FIVE people making the mess and one person cannot keep up with it all. The girl's do their share of helping by picking up their toys, putting away their own clothes (if asked) and doing a bit of dishwashing (which they think is fun), but at 7 and 5, they can't be expected to do an adult's share of the housework. If DH would just do a couple of things like have the kids pick up their toys each day and if he would wash dishes, wipe down the kitchen counter and just keep it tidy and clean and occasionally sweep the kitchen and dining room while I'm at work it would save me loads of time! But if I want him to do that, I have to ask each of those days for that stuff to be done and I end up feeling like a bossy, nagging slave driver! But if I don't I end up spending 3 or 4 hours just to get the kitchen cleaned up, then I still have laundry to wash and put away, food shopping to do, the bathroom to clean, etc. I get overwhelmed and pissed off!

:sigh:What can I do? About both the unhelpful DH and the oversleeping????? Especially the oversleeping. If I would go to bed earlier and get up earlier I could get the housework done and still have lots of time to play with my kids and do fun stuff like go online, read, watch movies and go swimming!

[DishyFishy]

Oh dear. Good job I read this before ragging on you in the other thread for skipping brekkie!

Have you tried speaking with hubby and calmly explaining what you expect of him? What you're asking certainly doesn't sound at all unreasonable to me. My SIL went through something similar, and by the time she approached her hubby, she was harbouring such resentment that she didn't trust herself to keep her temper. She wrote him a letter instead and actually scheduled an appointment to discuss it with him later! He was genuinely surprised there was even a problem since he was quite happy to live in a messy house. Anyway, the upshot was that he started doing more around the home, but he still needs a kick up the bum on a regular basis.

I'm not sure what to suggest for the sleeping thing though. If you can get hubby to pitch in a more, you might not be so exhausted that you need to sleep in?

[lucky]

I tend to be a night owl by nature and I went through a period of screwy sleep habits too. I finally had to FORCE myself out of bed for a few days. By doing so, I found I was really, really tired by the end of the day and WANTED to go to bed sooner. I can sleep late regardless of the number of hours of sleep I've gotten the night before so I still have to push myself sometimes but I'm at least on a normal schedule. Now that school is in I don't have a choice but to get up and moving so that helps too.

As for the housework would a chore chart help? It sounds like your DH is willing to help if you ask so maybe just posting what needs to be done somewhere would help him along without you having to ask. It worked around my house. I didn't have housework I needed help with but there were little maintainence projects that he kept putting off. I just posted each one on a dry erase board in the kitchen and added to the list as needed. Then, he'd erase them as they were done. For the things I wanted the kids to do, I drew pictures so that they could easily see what their jobs were. We'd put a star everytime something got done. Also, I kept everything that needed to be done daily on one chart and things that needed to be done weekly or less on another.

Also, maybe it would be helpful if you sat down together and noted the daily chores and decided together who should do what. That way he knows what you expect/need and you don't have to ask each day. I completely understand how annoying it is to have to ask for the obvious. I went through the same thing with my DH. But, once we talked about it I realized that he wasn't avoiding doing chores or intentionally letting things pile up. The mess just didn't bother him so he didn't tackle it unless I asked. Weird, I know, but he sees things differently than me. He isn't a slob by any means but we do have different priorities when it comes to our home so every now and then we have to touch base and work out the differences. And he's tired from work too and sometimes doesn't feel like doing chores any more than I do. On top of that we have VERY different ideas of what constitutes clean. For instance, he'll load the dishwasher after dinner but not wipe off the counters or table. Or he'll do a load of towels and then leave them in the dryer. He's sort of got a "clean enough" mentality and I like things practically sterilized. LOL.

[taekwondomom]

Thanks Ali and Jawsmom!
The simple solution was sitting right under my nose all along and I was just to frustrated to see it. Duh!
DH will be going back to school the end of September for his LAST semester and he will graduate, FINALLY, in February! HURRAH! But until then I'm the only one bringing in a paycheck and the combo of house-work and work-work has really been getting to me. A Chore Chart sounds fantastic, now I just have to find a way to bring it up to DH without insulting him.
DH totally doesn't mind living in a messy dirty house, it's what he grew up with as a kid! (MIL suffers from both an adult version ADD and a Pack Rat mentality so housecleaning is a real challenge for her even with her ADD meds.)
As for the sleeping late thing: I know the best way to combat it is to just get up even if I have to drag myself. So I'm going to move the alarm clock to across the room and set it tonight before I go to bed. Then I'll have to get up out of bed to shut it off. So as long as I don't climb back into bed after shutting off the alarm, I should be OK. Wish me luck! LOL

[alphabetsoup]

I'm such a night owl too - so I totally understand. My DH lets me sleep in on two of his three off days a week and I just relish staying up late and then sleeping in! The other five days, my 14 month old is my alarm clock.

I'd say if you do want to get up earlier, I'm not one for "cold turkey" on these things so I'd set the alarm for 30 minutes earlier each day and ease into it.

Not much advice on the DH cleaning front - mine could live in a messy filthy house and I, too, need sterilization like jawsmom! Even when I ask him to clean things, I usually clean it again after him when he isn't looking - his standards just aren't as high as mine. I'd advocate a "honey-do" list but that doesn't even work around here - he loses them everytime!