Feeling discouraged
 

Please forgive me if I am sounding whiny. Sometimes it helps me sort out my thoughts, or feel better if I write about things. I felt that here you all would probably understand, and I have been told to come here for the good times and the bad.

I am not old (48 ~ my head says that that is not old) but my body feels old. My feet pain, my joints ache, my hand joints ache. Because of the foot pain, I haven't been able to walk for my exercise. I like to travel and go sight seeing, but feet hurt too bad to enjoy that ~ and that would be a good way to have fun and exercise too. Because of the hand pain, I haven't been able to use the computer as much ~ that has been my source of connecting with people. Life is just not very enjoyable right now because of all the things I want to do, and I ache too much to do them. I try to stay off my feet to rest them up for the next days of work. That is not good, I need to move so I can get this weight off. How I wish now, that I had taken care of all this when I felt good. Why do I always procrastinate about stuff. I have some dr's appointments to see about these things, but I guess I am impatient to feel better.

Also I am feeling guilty, because I know there are people who are in far worse circumstances than I am. I shouldn't be whining.

Part of my discouragement is to have to admit to myself ~ that my husband has probably been right all along, and all my ailments are because of my fatness. I have been trying to make excuses for myself all along ~ telling myself that small people have achy joints, high blood pressure etc. I would like to blame him for some of my episodes of stuffing in the junk food, but ultimately, I am the one who did this to myself.

Well, enough whining. Thank you all for listening.

Gayle

Gayle,

I'm on my work break, and just have a second, but wanted to send you big HUGS!!! I hope you feel better!

Take care,
Sherry

Hello Gayle...from another NC gal...I can so relate. My problem is that my feet hurt sooo bad to that I am afraid to walk much...in a exercise form that is. I am constantly having to pace myself...planning what I will do in a given day..because I know that I will pay a dear price if I over do it?...It is a very depressing way to live!!!!

At the present I am in the 300's so I also have a lot of knee pain. I have found that swimming DOES HELP! Do you have any access to a swimming pool?..Maybe at the local hospital. I belong to the healthquest at a local hospital where they have a therapy pool and a large lap pool where they offer two joint action classes daily!..If I go like I should...on a regular basis...it does help the PAIN!

I am not doing so great with my eating!..I am attempting to be mindful of my eating (Dr. Phil book's) and also I am trying to learn to FEEL TRUE hunger?....I would love to walk everyday in a true exercise form....maybe one day!

I know now..whenever I work a full day..or go shopping at maybe three different stores..My feet swell and feel hot. Almost like I have been walking on hot sharp rocks is the way I explain it to my husband. I also have good ol' arthur in my spine.

So how is your way of eating going?..I hate to say diet..Also I have been reading alot lately about stretching...but I do not have a video or such to follow...I feel so un-flexible at times. Do you?...Also What kind of shoes do you mainly wear?..I wear Birkenstock and New Balance and also Easy Spirit for dresser styles. My mom likes SAS?..Kim in NC

There's nothing wrong with whining as long as you don't let it take over your life. :) The most important thing is to get on the right type of food plan for you, and to get your doctor's opinion of what exercises would be best for you. As the weight starts to come down you will find that it will help relieve some of the pain you currently experience and you'll be able to do the type of exercises that you really enjoy.

I agree that the water exercises would be a great exercise program for you if you have a pool nearby. But if not, at least concentrate on doing what you can do - any extra movement will help improve your joints and increase your weight loss even if you just go to Wal Mart and buy some of the stretch bands so that you can stretch while sitting and watching TV.


Melissa

I'm sorry that you're having a tough time and I don't really know what to say. :( I would like to tell you though, not to apologize, you can *ALWAYS* come here to gripe and for tons of support, on your "on days" and more importantly on your "off days." Any time, we'll be here. *hugs* -Apryl

A little whine is good for the soul (and a little wine is sometimes even better). The fact that you're thinking long and hard about what you can do to feel better about your weight and health AND examining what's holding you back proves that you're not satisfied to let the bad vibes take over. Go visit the "baby steps" thread to get some fresh ideas to get you on the right track and remember that we're always here for you and we all know exactly where you are and where you want to be - stick with us kid, there's safety in numbers :D

And you're right - 48 is NOT old (and that's coming from one who may be that on the outside but is still 18 on the inside) :)

yes, darlin.. what everyone has said... baby steps. admit the truth of the problem. comfy shoes [from a woman who bought a pair of men's shoes yesterday because they FIT and none of the women's shoes did!!!!]

bike riding is also fine for the joints. and maybe your doc could prescribe some physical therapy sessions. at our weight, sometimes our muscles are too weak to support any sort of exercise and some supervised PT sessions can help strengthen, and show us what we should be doing.

but also, get checked out. aches and pains in the fingers are NOT generally weight related.

Re: Feeling discouraged
 

That makes me mad.

Everyone has bad days. I am having a bad year. :) We know where you're at, I am there myself. We can & will do this, though. We've just got to!

Glynne, ((((HUGS)))). I'm sorry you're so down right now. We are her for you! I know it's hard to get moving when you're sore and discouraged, but once you start, you will start feeling better and it WILL get easier. It doesn't feel like it, but it will. Have you tried a recumbent bike. You sit back in the seat, almost like a chair, so you're not bearing any body weight on your feet, just pedaling. They have them at most gyms and YMCA's and I also bought one at K-Mart once for about $100 brand new. You could probably find them at garage sales too.

I know someone already mentioned swimming too and that is great exercise and feels so good.

Whatever you decide to do, we'll be with you every step of the way.

Many hugs to you! I'm sorry you're feeling so bad--pain is the pits and the great demotivator. I'm really glad you've made a doctor's appointment to find out the real source of the pain.

I think the swimming idea is excellent, and, from what I've read, will actually soothe your joints. If your foot pain is plantar fascitis (sp?), please look into orthotics. After treatment with a foot doc and getting orthotics, I was finally able to walk again despite my weight.

Simple stretching also helps those tight muscles and aching joints. Try a stretching video--there's a thread here where Sherry posted some great videos to try.

Please don't worry about being whiny--for one thing, you're not. :) Sharing good times and bad times with others is helpful to you and actually to all of us who are feeling the same way, but don't have the courage to share.

Jiffypop is right. You aren't going to have joint pain in your hands from being overweight. Could be a lot of things causing joint pain. Please go to the dr and see what he/she has to say.

Please feel free to come here and whine away. What are we here for if not to be shoulders to cry on, sounding boards and your own on-line support group?

I know the feeling ....
 

A newbie here .... and don't even know where to start ... wondering again WHICH diet to try next, after trying them ALL before, with 120 pounds to lose. Physically disabled, being treated for major depressive disorder/bi-polar, and just about at my wits end after five years of this fat hanging all over me.

When you've never had a weight problem -- I didn't -- and have done all the aerobics, exercise, dancing, for years, then gradually turn into what feels like a beached whale , it's really difficult to figure out what to do to get back to the "old me." Can't exercise, except for swimming, because of spinal disabilities, peripheral neuropathy, and can't drive because of eye disabilities, so ... what do I do next??? This 2-pounds a week weight loss stuff is just too discouraging. I need a quick start to get some confidence going.

Was thinking of leptoprin until I read articles about it ... and was more than a little skeptical after seeing that gal on TV ... did you notice she said she weighed 150-something and wore a size 7????? Puhleeeeze ... she must have glued a size 7 on, piece by piece, cuz there's no way 150 gets into a 7. :lol:

So ... I'm feeling :( ... :mad:

Ronda

Ronda, Welcome and glad to have you!! I think it depends on much of your weight is muscle, since muscle weighs more. I'm by no means muscular, but I exercise at least 5 days a week. At my weight, I wear a size 6 or 8, so it's definitely possible.

muscle weight?
 

Really doesn't have anything to do with it ... measurements do ... and I find it really difficult to believe anybody 150 pounds can wear a 7 ... a 10-12 .. maybe ... NOT a 7 ... I weighed 115 when I wore a 5 or 7 ... and trust me, you won't wear one at 150 ... unless you know something about some kind of new sizing that I don't. :lol: I don't know why people have to exagerate about stuff like that ... it really isn't important in the scheme of things.

Blond Ambition - Muscle really does weigh more than fat and take up less space. This is why two people can weigh 150 pounds and take completely different sizes. When you start to work out, you may find that you even start to gain weight, while loosing clothing size.

Somebody who religiously works out will certainly carry more muscle mass than fat cells.

I weigh 185 and wear a size 14-16, but there are others who are wearing the same size as me, but are closer to 200....they likely have a more muscular frame than me....

This is why many people suggest that you take your measurements when you start loosing weight...this is a much more accurate measurement than the scale.


Good luck to you....

No, I'm not exaggerating. I do weigh 162 and I do wear a size 6-8. My 8's are loose and my 6's are tight, so by the time I'm at 150, my 6's should be very comfortable. Every body is different. We each carry our weight differently and muscle weighs more while taking up less space.

Okay ... I'll dream about that ... sure isn't going to happen to me. lol

Thanks :) gl to you too

Also in this consideration is height and body shape. Someone that is 5'9 and 150 is going to take a smaller size than someone 4' 11 and 150 lbs.

thank you
 

Hello Everyone!

I just wanted to say thank you all for your encouragement and support. It helped me to not feel quite so discouraged. I have dr's appointments to try to get help with these aches. My primary physician prescribed some splints to wear at night on my arms ~ she said I had carpal tunel syndrome. Went to the foot dr yesterday to have molds made of my feet to make orthotics to try to relieve the foot pain. Have an appointment next Thursday with a rheumatologist because of the pain in my joints ~ also some blood level was elevated that showed inflamation. Hope they can figure things out. I have learned that I don't do good at not feeling good.

Again thank you all of your for listening and encouraging. Hope you all have a good weekend.

Gayle

Gayle, I'm so glad that you went to see the dr. and that some relief is on the way. I've had trouble with carpal tunnel in the past too and I know that it can be very painful.

Please be sure to keep us posted and let us know how you're doing.

Glynne - glad to hear you're feeling better physically and are in better spirts mentally. Now you're on an upward swing everything should start falling into place and you'll be back on your way with a vengence :)

BlondeAmbition - do you live in Canada or Britain by any chance? Although I think the posters here have explained the muscle vs fat issue very well in respect of clothing size, it also makes a difference where the article of clothing is made. I'm in the high 150s (finally) and wear size 10/12 Canadian made, but on my last trip to Buffalo purchased a pair of pants in size 7/8 that fit fine, so I can certainly see how a TV spokesperson could wear a size 7 at 150, and I doubt it's false advertising or exaggeration.

I sympathize with your problems and understand the difficulty of adjusting to being overweight after a history of normal weight, but even if you can't revert to your former self (and physical limitations aside that would be difficult by reason of the aging process, childbirth, less opportunity to participate in prior activities) you can still learn to eat properly and lose weight slowly (and I consider a 2 pound a week loss tremendous - think of what that totals in a year) and above all improve your overall physical and mental health.

I'm glad you're starting to feel better Gayle.

When I weighed 150-oh, so long ago-I wore a size fourteen jeans-I could dream about getting to a size six or eight, but I doubt it will ever happen...wonder why everyone is in such different sizes? Although I wasn't exercising back then like I am now...but I'm in an eighteen pants now (at 204)-I would be ecstatic to be a 12 or 14. I don't think my hipbones are narrow enough to fit in a six or eight, ever, unfortunately! Russian Jewish grandmothers on both sides of my family did not pass narrow hips to me (or small thighs, either).

Sherry

Have you tried Old Navy, Sherry? I'm at 202 right now (are we ever going to see Onderland??), and can comfortably fit into a sz. 16 Old Navy jeans. I tried on a pair of sz. 14 dress pants today that were kind of loose on my daughter when she went to boot camp (I'm betting they'll hang on her when she comes home on leave) and actually got them on and buttoned, although I couldn't zip them. I'm hoping that in a month I can wear them to her boot camp graduation.

I'm really hoping I can get into a size 10 when I reach my goal. I think that the weight lifting is helping a lot. I know when I was younger I got into a sz. 14 when I weighed 150 so I think sizing has changed a lot. Hey, I always buy the pants that have a smaller size, despite the price. It's good for my self-esteen! :)

Sheila,

It's so weird you mentioned Old Navy-I went to the mall today, and literally stood outside the store, debating whether to go in and try their jeans (I've never bought clothes there ) I was feeling in a bad mood and didn't want to deal with trying on clothes, so I didn't go in. I will try there soon!

Sherry

(((((((Big Hugs)))))) to you sweetie! I know we have all felt this way at some point. I think I blamed everyone but George Bush for me being fat..even God.. You know, the "how could you let me get like this" syndrome? But the truth I had to face was that life is all about choices.. Sometimes we make good ones, sometimes not so good.. But as long as we are making mostly good choices then we are doing our best..

Don't know if that helped at all, but please remember that all of the great people on this board are here for you!!