I really planned and planned, foodwise, for this Thanksgiving. Many of you were part of helping me figure it out and reinforce my ideas. I am thankful for all of your input, etc.
I thought I had it figured out, planned alot, gave it alot of thought, had the tools, could face the food with reserve, had healthy alternatives and more.
And still, I could not get through the four days without bingeing. I just didn't have the willingness, I guess.
I am beginning to think that it's been 48 years of horrible horrible unhealthy eating (started at age 12 for me). Maybe it's too ingrained in who I am. I feel like I can never have any long term real food sanity. Do I need to have a heart attack or stroke??? I've 'tried again' a hundred times or more. I am feeling like it's just too late.
I am feeling guilty that now 33 year old son has food issues. He is gaining weight steadily. I was never a good role model for him.
I don't know if it can ever happen for me.
I guess I will try again...



Ya know what? That feeling will go away too! As a woman, middle-aged and menopausal, every emotional moment on this road to losing weight is different. But the weight loss trend, it's still with me. And I am so encouraged by the fact that I KNOW I'm never giving up.