3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

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-   100 lb. Club (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/100-lb-club-55/)
-   -   getting compliments (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/100-lb-club/170244-getting-compliments.html)

WhitePicketFences 04-28-2009 02:08 PM

Oh, those stages are funny!
Guess I haven't hit stage 3 yet, though in the next 2 months I am seeing relatives I haven't seen since I started ...

H8cake 04-28-2009 02:19 PM

A woman that I see only once in a while asked me if I was okay. She was worried that I had lost the weight because I was sick. She said she always worries about that when she sees someone lose a lot.
A guy in a store I frequent asked me if he could ask me a personal question. It was kind of funny, because he leaned towards me and said it really low. I appreciated that, I like compliments, but not the ones that yell it for everyone to hear type. He asked if I had lost some weight, pretty funny considering how much I've lost, lol! Anyway, he said "you look great!" That made my day.

matt_H 04-28-2009 04:36 PM

Thanks for all of the comments everyone!

I just had a meeting with 3 co-workers that I haven't seen in long time (we are in separate offices) and I got several compliments today. More general along the lines of "you look great!" and so that made my day. :)

chickiegirl 04-28-2009 05:20 PM

I recently was too uncomfortable to tell one of my bosses they looked like they had lost weight. I wanted to say congrats, but I thought, what if there isn't that big a difference and I'm overstepping here so as to imply this person looked large before?

barefootnikki 04-28-2009 05:24 PM

I think it's great to let someone know --- but if someone said something like "Wow, you look so much better" or something... that would be rude.

cfmama 04-28-2009 08:55 PM

I love getting compliments... what I DON'T love is people trying to figure out how much I weigh...

"so you've lost how much?"
105 lbs
"so how much do you want to lose?"
I'll just keep going until I get there...
"so what's your goal weight?"

at which point I usually say that I'm not telling them how much I used to weigh or what I weigh now or what I want to weigh ;)

Thighs Be Gone 04-28-2009 09:00 PM

Lori--yeah, I know--the BIG C--it surprised me too!

You are a sweetheart! Hugs coming your way! :)

Windchime 04-28-2009 09:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kae (Post 2717324)
***********************************************
I think this is what you were looking for... :) I copied it below:
***********************************************

Prepare for a deluge. After the more observant people start noticing, the dimmer ones do eventually, too. Others are likely to have noticed already, but they might still trying to be tactful & they're still not sure how to raise the issue when they see you. Wait till you wear something new. Your haircut could do it, too.

It goes in phases. You could probably chart it, like early adopters & outliers:

1) The observant notice & say something.

2) The less observant notice & speak up.

...

That's it, Kae--Thanks! I think I'm teetering between phases 1 and 2. Hmmm. Not as far along as I'd like, but I'll take it!

JulieJ08 04-28-2009 10:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cfmama (Post 2718137)
I love getting compliments... what I DON'T love is people trying to figure out how much I weigh...

"so you've lost how much?"
105 lbs
"so how much do you want to lose?"
I'll just keep going until I get there...
"so what's your goal weight?"

at which point I usually say that I'm not telling them how much I used to weigh or what I weigh now or what I want to weigh ;)

People are nuts and they don't even realize it, usually.

"What a strange question."

or, "Wow, you're braver than me! I'd feel so awkward asking someone that!"

Of course, I can never think of these things at the time.

Thighs Be Gone 04-28-2009 10:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thisisnotatest (Post 2718191)

And who are these people that all seem so concerned that everyone is sick and dying if they lose weight.
This is no true show of concern, they are just trying to unsettle you.

I think in my case it was actually a cultural difference. The lady went on to tell me that her daughter was "really fat" and she wanted to know details of my own journey.


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