...and I'm surprisingly calm about it. I am going to visit my parents at their house, which in the past almost always meant complete food disruption. This time, however, I have prepared them for weeks. I have asked them not to buy fast food / pizza / sugar and processed junk food for my children or me. I have purchased enough healthy food for me to last about two weeks so I won't get bored with my selection there, and I have made such a big deal about wanting to eat good foods and exercise that I would be embarrassed to go off plan while I'm there. My dad might even be able to line up a pool so that I don't have to give up swimming for the week I'm there. Sweet, huh?
I had a terrible, off-plan day today, and I'm so ready to be back on. I took my 10YO son went to the emergency room last night after he put his foot through my living room window, and my 3YO daughter had surgery scheduled for early this morning. So, the tiredness added to the anxiety caused me to feel stressed and vulnerable. I had packed healthy food just in case I got hungry, but the fresh-baked cookies they brought in the waiting room for the families of patients proved too much for me today. So, I ate three of them. Then, I purchased and consumed a bag of chocolate licorice while filling prescriptions for my baby. No excuses, and no real guilt either. There will be days when I screw up, and this seemed like an extreme circumstance. I got back on plan after the licorice, and I'm ready for the week with my parents. I also learned something. For so long, I've thought that there had to be something desirable about bingeing for me to have done it for so long. I was either wrong, or I've been able to turn off some switch after 11 weeks of healthier eating, 'cuz it was no fun at all. I didn't enjoy the food, the vomitous feeling, nor the sugar hangover.
LaurieDawn - that kids having surgery/in ER business is much like my "I just got 5 stitches in my finger and didn't have dinner and i'm going to get fast food because i'm hungry and exhausted and upset". It happens. Glad you don't have much guilt about it.
And WAY TO GO on planning so well for going away! Looks like you have done all the planning you can to make this a success.
I hope all goes well with your children and their recovery.
You have ZERO to feel guilty about. ZERO. These things are going to happen throughout our lives. The key difference being that an off day means just that - a DAY, not weeks and weeks.
You sound like you've got everything covered while away at your parents home. That's just great!!! Enjoy your visit and enjoy your new lifestyle. Good luck!!! Please update us as soon as you get back.
Thanks for the thoughts and the concerns. I did have a surprisingly pleasant visit with my parents and my siblings/nieces/nephews who live close to them. I wasn't perfect, but I did fairly well with my food choices, and made sure that I exercised. My dad even said that I might have inspired him to do something about his situation as well. Nothing would make me happier. He has so many health issues surrounding his weight. He agreed to let me make him a meal plan for the first few weeks and he would try and stick to it.
I got so many compliments there. The adults were having a conversation, and one of the children started crying, so I got up to check it out. My brother-in-law said, "I knew it would be the skinny one who would get up and do it." So strange. I looked around, and he was right. I was the skinny one! My mom had also planned on donating clothes that no longer fit her, and one of my sisters had asked her why she hadn't offered them to me. She said, "All of my daughters have outgrown me." When I showed up, though, she asked me what size I wore now. She had sizes 12 - 18. I wear some 18s, some 16s, depending on different factors. So she asked if I wanted to look through them, and I now have clothes - dresses, suits, jeans, tops, etc. - in a variety of sizes so that I don't have to worry about buying clothes for another forty or fifty pounds or so! I was getting so tired of hitching up my pants and searching through thrift stores/clearance sales!
I am so happy to be back to my home and my support network, though. It was so much harder to do this when I was away! Thanks to everyone for posting. I draw such great inspiration here.
Leaving for a week or so
