I hit 300 pounds yesterday. I have never been this heavy in my life. I just can't believe this. This can not be me... I used to be a size five.
Since the birth of my son, 9 years ago, weight has been a constant struggle. Never before did I struggle with weight. I've lost this stupid fat a million times. How can I do it again when I know it's just going to come back PLUS some?!
I want to scream and cry. I can't make love to my husband, I'm too ashamed. I can't ride (horses) or hike (I teach at summer camp) or walk for lengths of time without sweating a pool all over myself. I'm angry and confused. Why can't I just get ahold of this part of my life?! Everything else is good, I'm disciplined everywhere else in my life, except controling my eating habits. It's like an addiction. Is there even such a thing as Eaters Annonymous?
What do I do? Is it even possible to weigh HALF OF MYSELF again?! How the heck do I keep it off?!
Help!
PS I'm not new, I changed my name because I shame my former username (living water).
Yes, it is an addiction. And yes overeaters Annonymous does exsist
And yes it is possible to weight half of yourself again. Keeping it off is a daily challange, but with new learned habbits it is possible. You have to change your whole lifestyle, and never go back to your "fat self" ways.
You have to take it one day and one pound at a time. Sometimes it doesn't take long to lose the weight, and sometimes it takes forever. But if you just take it day by day, and sometimes hour by hour, it is possible. Hard as heck, but very possible.
As for what you do, getting a support group is the first step, and you've got one here! There are hundreds of us here, just like you, and we all support each other.
If you have a hard time "dieting" - Don't think of it as a diet, think of it as just a way of life now. And take baby steps, changing only a few things at first (like cutting out pop and candy), and then adding things each week (no fast food, exercising, less calories, portion control), and you'll soon see results.
Its hard to get motivated enough to start, but once you do start, and you see results, it gets so much more easier!
I know that we are doing the right thing by reaching out to others. We can't do this on our own. I will be your accountability partner if you would like. I need one so badly. I just only recently got on the scale when I went to the hospital. The emergency room nurse had me get out of the wheel chair and onto the scale. I was sick at the reading of 289. I then was wheeled to my room and the emergency room nurse says " I already weighed her, she is 289" . My main nurse then said. "Is that her weight with the wheel chair?" and the ER nurse said" No, It's all her". I was like, Hellooo, I'm still here. I wanted to crawl in a hole. I tell the story to my friends, because it was a turning point for me. You have to laugh about it some, but I realized that night that I was killing myself with food. So good luck and if you need a partner, I can be it.
Tammy
I could have practically written your post word for word. I have sooo been there. I felt like I was missing out on so very much. It was an awful feeling. My family would go on hikes and go horseback riding, swimming, boating - and I ALWAYS came up with some lame excuse to avoid it. I can't tell you how sad that made me. I was so incredibly MISERABLE. I was truly missing out on LIFE.
But then I had enough. I no longer wanted to sit around. I wanted to PARTICIAPTE. I wasn't getting any younger. It was TIME for me to make a change. It was time for me to realize that food just COULDN'T be as important as good health, being active and enjoying myself. IF food is an addiction, it's one that CAN be beat. Or certainly MANAGED - you just have to want to - very, very, VERY badly.
The truth is once I made the DECISION to no longer be fat - NO MATTER WHAT, once I made the COMMITMENT to a better, healthier more active existience - my willpower came into play and it really has no been all that difficult. It's way easier to eat healthy and exercise then it is to be morbidly obese, sad and miserable. Once you get into this new lifestyle IT'S actually more addicting then the food ever was. I promise you that.
And yes!!!! - it's possible to lose 1/2 of yourself - you most CERTAINLY CAN do it. It's all up to you - it's within your power. You CAN do it and you SHOULD do it.
Make yourself a plan. STICK TO IT - NO MATTER WHAT!!!! Rid your house of ALL the junk. ADD in healthy, wholesome delicious foods. Experiment with different - HEALTHY recipes. Make a weekly plan for all your meals and snacks. DECIDE that's what you're going to eat and STICK WITH IT. The first few weeks ARE tough, but hang in there, cause then it gets much, much easier. And enjoyable. I love seeing that scale drop. Love it! I love having my clothes get loose. I love feeling good, looking good, being healthy and getting compliments (added bonus ). Add activity of some sort into your daily life. A 15 minute walk at first is all it takes. Add to it each and every week. Count your calories using Fitday.com or some similar site. Hold yourself accountable. Eat veggies, lowfat proteins, whole grains. Get EXCITED. The end of your misery and inactivity can be coming to a close. Your days ahead can be filled with more joy, more happiness, more ACTIVITY, more clothes ( ), just plain old MORE.
Good luck to you. Stick around 3FC. Read. Ask questions. Get involved. Take CONTROL of your life. It will be the best DECISION you've ever made.
Sozo,
I here where you are coming from, You can see my beginning weight at 279, but I didn't get a scale until maybe 2 months eating less, I know the # was more like 290. I felt so angry with myself, beating myself up, but it didn't help me feel better, or lose weight. Anyone can let themselves become fat, obese,ect.. But it takes hard work and determination to loose it. It is possible, look at Robin for example she has lost half of her body weight. I am just beginning, and everyday I need to push myself, but I think of all the things why I want to do it, and what will happen if I don't, so I make myself stick to plan, and come here to be accountable. It is doable, you can do it, and you don't need to spend money on clubs or anything. I am just eating less calories, using fitday.com and exercising. 27+lbs ago I couldn't move without feeling tired, I started doing 3 minutes on my elliptical machine, and now I can do more than 30 minutes, you can do a 3 minute walk in your neighborhood, and than increase it to 5 when you feel right, and keep on increasing it until you feel you are pushing yourself.
this is possible and I know if you really want to you can do it, and everyone here will be cheering you along. cheryl
Sozo, you have made the first step in the right direction by coming back here for support. We all know you can do it. We'll all be here to help you along the way. And you know that through any of your posts, you may be helping someone else.
One day at a time! Don't look at your final number goal, just take it one day at a time. Start slow and just keep getting better and better. YOU CAN DO IT!!
Oh, I'm SO right there with you!!!!
I want you to know that I believe in you...you've done this before , and you can do it again!
I think you should keep on using your old username.... you do NOT shame it!
Head up and read the thread following my 250 post and Sherry's (Suzie76) broken record thread too....we hit the SAME point on the SAME day....how amazing is that!
I just want to add to everyone else's comments and tell you that YES, of COURSE you can do this. It will take time, but that time is going to pass anyway. Do you want to spend it being miserable or do you want to spend it enjoying seeing that scale go down?
Last July I weighed 275. I made a decision that I was going to take care of it this time, no matter how long it took. I came to 3FC every day for support and accountability. I made a spreadsheet that shows my weight loss and my goals, and I got so much pleasure from updating it with my new weight every Tuesday. It looked like SUCH a long way to go back then, but now my weight is at the bottom of the chart and I'm almost there. Imagine how I'd feel now if I'd let all that time pass without doing it. Do NOT let yourself wait another day. You can do this, and we're here for you every step of the way.
My advice is to use every tool you can find for motivation and inspiration and accountability. Make charts, write down goals, read and post on 3FC as much as you can, and get all the information you can about nutrition and exercise. You probably already know TONS about it, because everyone who has lost weight in the past is pretty knowledgeable about such things already. But I find that if I keep thinking about it and learning about it, it's impossible for me not to stay on track. It was all those years of mindlessly eating and NOT moving my body that got me to 275. Back then, I avoided thinking about nutrition and exercise because I knew I wasn't willing to do the work. The more I keep it in the forefront of my mind now, the more success I have.
One last thing, and then I'll stop rambling! Find an exercise that you LOVE. Believe it or not, I'm sure there is something out there that you can get addicted to. I started running when I got down to 250, and I'm hooked. It's the most important part of my maintenance plan, and it's something I enjoy.
Good luck to you, and come back to this forum as much as you can -- it's been a HUGE factor in the success I've had so far.
OK, you've made a huge step in realising and admitting to the problem. The second thing you've done is come here. Posting on this site and this forum in particular are some of the most sympathetic, supportive, wonderful people that it has been my privilege to get to know - as you probably know already.
Just make a start - writing everything down as Lisa suggests is a fantastic way to do things. It's incredible how accountable you become when you realise just how many calories are in that chocolate/cake/cheese or whatever your trigger foods are.
Secondly - get those trigger foods out of the house. If they're not in the house, then you have to go and buy them and that'll give you a chance to realise what you're doing.
You guys are so sweet. I will be sticking around, no more running...
My husband and I had a heart to heart last night. I told him that I'm depressed for the first time in my life and weighing more than ever. Last night I had given up hope of ever being healthy again. He encouraged me to seek help, perhaps a therapist? Someone who can help me understand why I can't get ahold of this area.
I woke up renewed this morning. So far, I've had nothing but water, veggies and fruit. I don't desire anything else (right now). Your posts of encouragement have really given me wings. I'll be reading them over and over, again.
Today is day one of what I pray will be a changed me. So far down in the pit all I can see is the black around me, but I know there's more beyond this pit. Thank you for reminding me. :heart:
It can't be me...
I have never been this heavy in my life. I just can't believe this. This can not be me... I used to be a size five. 
We can do it
I was like, Hellooo, I'm still here.
I wanted to crawl in a hole. I tell the story to my friends, because it was a turning point for me. You have to laugh about it some, but I realized that night that I was killing myself with food. So good luck and if you need a partner, I can be it.
). Add activity of some sort into your daily life. A 15 minute walk at first is all it takes. Add to it each and every week. Count your calories using Fitday.com or some similar site. Hold yourself accountable. Eat veggies, lowfat proteins, whole grains. Get EXCITED. The end of your misery and inactivity can be coming to a close. Your days ahead can be filled with more joy, more happiness, more ACTIVITY, more clothes ( 
. I am just beginning, and everyday I need to push myself, but I think of all the things why I want to do it, and what will happen if I don't, so I make myself stick to plan, and come here to be accountable. It is doable, you can do it, and you don't need to spend money on clubs or anything. I am just eating less calories, using fitday.com and exercising. 27+lbs ago I couldn't move without feeling tired, I started doing 3 minutes on my elliptical machine, and now I can do more than 30 minutes, you can do a 3 minute walk in your neighborhood, and than increase it to 5 when you feel right, and keep on increasing it until you feel you are pushing yourself.
