You guys are all right. I fogot about all that sagging skin on My 600 lb. Life. I know it's none of my business what she does but it bothers me that there are not stricter rules when it comes to this surgery like having to actually try to lose weight for a year or so. I've been struggling since i was 15, ALWAYS been overweight and i can't get a quick fix. Just doesn't seem right to me.
I have six acquaintances who have had some kind of weight loss surgery. All but one have gained the weight back. That one has really dedicated his life to weight training and healthy eating for the past two years.
I read an article once about someone following the recommended gastric bypass diet (something like 1oz every hour) and losing a lot of weight quickly.
It's not a magic fix - it simply makes it very difficult to overeat for a while.
I think it's time to be thankful that you can follow a plan relatively easily and you're not at the point where it's a last resort. I say this as someone who has definitely had my food/body demons and I can completely understand where you're coming from.
I don't talk about this much because I find it a little embarrassing. I had a gastric bypass a little over 10 years ago. I saw a couple of other people do it and lose weight so fast, I was desperate to try.
I went from 302 to 199, then hit a plateau, then had a really bad year with a lot of stressful things - got laid off from a job I loved (company got bought out, gradually laid everyone off) and was having trouble finding something new, close family member died, was having some pain from a medical prob that ended up not being serious but the pain for a while was enough to derail my workout routine. I was unprepared. I had gone to a surgeon that was inconveniently located, because I knew two people that had their surgeries with that particular surgeon. But it was really hard for me to get to the support groups held at that hospital, so I never went. And, totally my fault, I never sought out other options I COULD get to.
My nutrition education involved being told to basically eat high protein low carb, and a thin booklet with a few ideas. I gradually went back to eating the same stuff I used to, just in smaller portions. And half the time I would take my leftovers and just eat them later as a snack instead of saving it for another meal.
I gained everything back. The only reason my starting weight is (slightly) lower than my pre-WLS weight is because I managed to keep a little off from a weight loss attempt a few years back when I stalled out in the 260s, then regained some again.
But now I'm even lower than I was post-surgery. I've had a slow/plateau-ish couple of months, but I still feel very committed.
Having WLS didn't make WW easier this past year either. I do better when I track, measure, stay within my points/cals, just like everyone else. I eat the same amount of daily points as anyone else with my weight/size and have NO problem getting them in. I started working out 3 days a week and now most weeks I work out 6 days a week.
There are things I'll always have to deal with from surgery - a tummy scar, gassy and sometimes (sorry a little tmi) irregular, and if I don't chew certain foods very carefully they get stuck and I have to throw them up. Though I'm better at avoiding this now, so maybe once or twice a year.
Surgery doesn't force you to eat the "right things" or stop you from eating if you are sad or stressed out. You still may plateau. You still may get derailed. Some people see their body change and it motivates them enough to keep going. Others are going to need to address issues with their eating and weight gain face on, and surgery won't let them avoid that. Personally I've found that I respond MUCH better to gradual changes too.
I take total responsibility for my weight gain, I don't think the surgery "failed." Obviously I made a lot of bad choices, hit a lot of stumbling blocks I had trouble overcoming. Just like anything else, there are no guarantees!
I completely understand I am still struggling with weight and my sister who had the procedure is thin. 5 years ago we were both the same weight. She had medical issues and made the best choice for her. I have lost 25 pounds since however, it has been a much slower process for me.
I wanted to thank you for posting your point of view. Sometimes you just gotta do what's right for you- but I can't even imagine how hard it must have been going through all that without the support you needed.
I totally understand how it looks like an easy fix, but it's not. My sister Amy had gastic bypass several years ago, and she would give anything to go back in time and do it the 'regular' way. With that said, I'm not sure the regular way would have happened for her without seeing it in hindsight (more of that below). I'm very neutral on the subject - it's great for some people and not for others. But after seeing what Amy went through, I know it's not an easy way out. Going to WW is much easier! She shares her story freely with people, so I'll give you some details.
First, in the beginning, she still had her food issues. Head hunger, as well as eating for the love of it. She wasn't prepared to smell food, and need food, and want food, and know that if she took a bite it could make her very sick, or possibly even kill her. It wasn't possible to learn life skills like moderation. It made it difficult to cook for the family, or deal with her teenagers coming in with friends eating pizza or fast food. Gone were the options to control her eating. Her choice was abstain or face severe consequences. I'm sure some people can deal with that just fine, but for many people, like Amy, the reason they couldn't lose weight before was because of the difficulty in getting past these moments where the first bite begins. Losing that freedom to choose was even harder for her.
She also has some long term issues that will probably never go away. Herbs such as basil and oregano make her sick. Soy sauce makes her sick. Ground beef causes problems. Actually, for a couple of years, she had to practically mince her food because it didn't feel like it would pass unless she did. Her blood sugar spikes dramatically after eating sweets, and sometimes it makes her ill. There are so many things that don't agree with her now that she is reluctant to try new foods.
She's now limited in what medications she can take. Some things pass through so quickly that she doesn't absorb it all. Nutrition wise as well as medication wise. And this causes problems in the bathroom, which interferes with travel and even just going out for the day. And she can now eat as much as she did before, so she has to 'diet' just like everybody else, but now with her permanently re-routed stomach and lifelong digestive issues.
But like I said before - I am not sure she could have lost the weight without it. For her, it was the right decision at the time. It took a lot of bravery to go through with it, and a lot more strength to endure the physical and psychological changes that were quite overwhelming for several months.
I'm glad she did go through with it though, because she was reluctant for some time to go for a physical. When she lost weight, she got an exam and found out that she had a cyst in her ovary that needed to be removed. They found cancer cells in it, but it was early enough that she didn't need chemo. So had she not lost the weight quickly and gone to the doctor, the cancer may have advanced. So overall it's a happy story, but it would have been even better had she been able to do it on her own.
What great replies! I see both sides now. My friend who just had the surgery came up to me the other day and we were talking. I was asking how she was feeling and she admitted that mentally it's so hard because she still wants the foods she wants. She hasn't dealt with those issues yet, which i'm sure is the hardest part.
Jennifer, i'm so glad your sister is ok with the cyst. I've had 2 rupture and it's not fun
Somni, thank you for sharing your story, i'm sure it's not an easy way of life.
I guess i'm just frustrated, i weighed in this past Sat after having a great week and only lost .6 lbs. I"m still in the beginning and already plateauing and annoyed. I only eat about half my weeklies and now feel maybe i need to see what happens if i eat all of them. This is why i get so frustrated and makes me say forget it! I'm only on my 4th week for the millionth time doing ww and it's discouraging to lose 4, up .4, lose .6. I want solid losses
2 years ago I was approved for Lapband Surgery, I had 2 weeks to go before going under the knife and decided not to have it done. I think it was the best decision I've ever made because I proved to myself and everyone else that major weightloss can happen with diet and exercise alone!
I had gastric sleeve on 7/6/11. It has not been easy, but it has worked for me. As my surgeon's office support groups are not easy for me to get to I joined Weight Watchers for support and for the long run.
I am so happy of my choice for the sleeve and going back to WW. I think everyone has to do what they need to do. I had tried for years (yes I really tried) and I would lose a few, then gain a few back. It is hard to actually change a lifestyle, which is what I am trying to do. I am about at the weight I want to be now, and my plan is to continue with WW to keep it off.
I think we're taught to be jealous and uncharitable about weight loss. We're taught to judge, envy (and sometimes even hate) people who make different choices than our own. It's as if we're TRAINED to see one and only one right way to accomplish the task of weight loss.
Everybody seems to have it easier than we do.
People who have less weight to lose, they have it easier because their problem isn't as big as ours.
People who have a lot more weight to lose than we do, bhave it easier ecause they (usually) get to see greater results than we do.
People who live alone have it easier than those of us living with families, because they can be selfish and devote more time to themselves.
People who live with families have it easier than those of us living alone, because they have the love and support of family.
Those of us who don't have to work have it easier than those of us who do, because they have more time.
Those of us who work outside the home have it easier than those of us who don't, because we have to be within reach of the fridge all day.
It really is always greener over the other side of the weight loss fence.
The easy way is always the way we aren't choosing. It is human nature to assume that one's own life is much more difficult than average, in fact most of us thing so. However, the very nature of average makes it impossible for all of us to be worse off than the average). Most of us are a lot more average, and far less exceptional than we think we are.
I think the biggest reason for assuming that we're working harder than everyone else is because we get to see and feel our own effort, but we almost never reallly get to see anyone else's effort. We only get to see their results, and their outward demeaner and sometimes it's easy to assume that boh are effortless, because we didn't get to see the effort. And if it seems effortless, it's very easy to envy. But usually walking in someone else's shoes isn't any more or less difficult than walking in one's own - it's just different.
Envy usually isn't a positive emotion. It usually doesn't inspire one to better behavior, it inspires anger, resentment, frustration, and sometimes even powerlessness. And it makes it difficult to support one another. You can't give or receive support from someone who inspires anger, jealousy, envy, or resentment. Only sympathy and empathy make giving and receiving support possible.
It's virtually impossible to sympathize and empathize with everyone, but the more you can the more you help yourself and others. You can make the weight loss journey easier on yourself and others, or you can make it harder. I think envy and other negative emotions only make it harder.
One of the reasons I love 3FC and my local TOPS (taking off pounds sensibly) is that both groups stress how difficult weight loss can be for everyone, and that no matter what our situation we can be of support and assistance to each other. It's not always perfect, but giving up the negative emotions can really make the process so much easier.
First let me say, I understand exactly what you are saying. However, I want to give you all a different perspective on this subject. 11 years ago, I had a gastric bypass. I was 5' 7 and 288 pounds. My weight issues started at when I was about 13 years old. I went up and down 10 to 30 pounds for the next 10 years and was on various diets including weight watchers. Later got married and pregnant (2X) and gained lots of weight. Also during this time lost both of my parents. Given that I have issues with food, I continued the path until my health was in serious jeopardy. The decision to have the surgery was very difficult. I wanted to be able to do this on my own and knew that I should have been able to do it. Other's can. Why not me? However, I was terrrified of where I was headed if I did not get my weight under control and I had failed many times over on various programs.
I had very serious complications from the gastric bypass due to a undetected tear in my intestine. I spent many weeks in the hospital and off work recovering. I was one step from complete organ failure due to the infection this tear caused. This was a known risk with this type of surgery. So the decision process is not easy and the recovery is often difficult as well. Not to mention the out of pocket expense we had from this experience. I lost 120 pounds before my weight loss tapered off....with another 15 pounds I needed to lose. I have been working on those pounds for the past few years. I keep my weight within a 10 pound range of my goal. Yes it is still a struggle, but one that I can now manage. The surgery was a tool to help me get control of my weight. It is not a cure. Yes, it was a drastic tool.... with lots of risk. This is not the right decision for everyone, I am just saying it was for me. I have always envied those who could do what I was not able to following a weight loss plan. So I guess there is some envy on both sides.
So sorry you had so many complications, i couldn't imagine. I lost my father the day after Christmas last year and completely fell off any wagon i was on. I was doing well, losing weight, slow but losing. After he died, my world came crashing down. Also had ventral hernia surgery this pas May. With all this i started numbing my sadness and pain with going out to eat nightly to see my friend that bartended in town. With that came all the drinking to erase the pain of my dad dying. Finally by Oct i got a grip and stopped all this madness but never returned to WW until beginning of Feb.
I tell myself when i think about where i was a year ago....coulda, woulda, shoulda and need to keep going forward. It's just disheartening to think i'm NOW trying to get off the ADDED weight of where i was a year ago instead of moving forward where i left off Very frustrating and saddens me as unfortunately i define myself by my weight.
He was in the wheel chair not because of his weight but because he contracted a disease after his surgery that paralyzed him from the neck down and he couldn't move anything for over a year.
Weight loss surgery is never the easy way. For it to be successful, you have to follow a limited food plan and you can gain it all back. To me, if you can follow that food plan, you could have lost weight with conventional means. I think the insurance companies are paying out millions for people who care too little about themselves to have the surgery and fail. Weight loss surgery should be self paid like other plastic surgery.
I agree, I'm surprised insurance is paying for it like they do. I work in insurance and it amazes me that there are not higher requirements for this surgery. My friend walked in, had a high enough BMI and scheduled the surgery. Another friend of mine has a neighbor that purposely GAINED to have the surgery. It's crazy to me!!
I got on here looking for help regarding how to deal with jealous co-workers. I probably shouldn't care but I feel so isolated at work, and why??? Because I had gastric bypass and lost half of my body weight. And then they want to make it seem as if I've changed. Well, yes I have changed! I'm half the person that I used to be but I don't walk around with a big head, I'm very grateful to GOD for such an opportunity. I'm living my dream!!!
I guess it hurts me because I was expecting people to be more supportive or uncaring. I'd almost rather see them unconcerned then for them to act so jealous and hate on me for having the courage to go after my dreams.
As far as this being an easy way out; well, I thought so too but I can tell you this was one of the most difficult challenges that I've ever had to face. Yes, I look better now at 40 y.o. than I did at 30 y.o.; and I have the energy of a 25 y.o. But psychologically, I'm still that fat girl on the inside who really wants to just retreat and binge eat when I'm under a lot of stress. And then I have to deal with jealous women, who have not once taken to time to ask me how everything is going for me but assume that everything is hunky-dory because I look good!
So for those of you who are jealous, don't be! Instead of putting energy into being jealous, redirect that energy into going after your dreams. I guarantee you that there will not be enough time in the day to be jealous of someone else. Life is way too short!!! Let us have our moment to shine! We've earned it, even if it wasn't done in a traditional way!
