As I approach 50 in a couple of years, I am just tired of trying to lose weight. I look at my pictures as a 2 year old and I was pretty fat. I look at my 10 year old pictures...same thing. I starved, fasted and worked out almost daily through my teens so I could look normal. From my 20's on I have gained and lost weight so many times I can't remember. Now about 15 pounds away from 300, surprisingly I just can't get excited about dieting or getting healthy anymore. Today I spent hours re-watching dozens of You tube videos about how I should eat. I didn't eat until 3 pm today because I literally couldn't make up my mind about how or what to eat. My wife asked me what I wanted to add to the grocery list and have for supper. I honestly didn't know. Meat? Milk? Veggies? Fruit? I don't enjoy food anymore because every single piece of food I eat makes me question "is this healthy or bad for me? Should I eat this much or because it's healthy this much? How many carbs or fat or calories is in this? If I eat this way, will I live for 5 or 30 more years?" These thoughts are just the tip of the iceberg. I think I'm burnt out from eating and dieting. If this were a drug or smoking addiction, at least I could just stop. But food, come on. I'm not depressed, just frustrated and pissed off that my entire life has been dictated by food. Anyone else feel like this?
Thanks Squeaky. My Doctor keeps pushing Low Carb, but I can't last very long on it. Little changes might be the way to go. I wish I had a reboot button to get motivated again. Cya
Hey Carboman! I'm 49 and have been overweight for about the last 15 years. In August of 2014 I gave up Diet Coke because of internet promises that the mere act of giving up nutrasweet would cause me to lose weight. It was very difficult. No question the hardest thing I've done in my weight loss journey. I told my husband if I didn't lose any weight I was going back to my beloved Diet Coke on Christmas. I did feel a little better but I didn't lose any weight until the week before Christmas when I got a nasty cold and lost my appetite. Amazingly, I lost 7 pounds. Now I had had plenty of nasty colds where I'd lose my appetite when I was on Diet Coke, and maybe I'd lose a pound or two, but 7 pounds??? That Diet Coke had clearly been doing something to me that was causing me to keep the weight on. After Christmas, I went back to eating normally but without diet coke and gained back most of those seven pounds. But when I began my real weight loss journey on Ash Wednesday of 2015, this time my weight loss strategy (simply cutting out sugar) worked. And the weight was coming off quickly and easily.
I'm still overweight, and if I want to keep losing it's going to take a lot of work, but I'm at a point where I no longer disgust myself and it feels right at this point in my life to be focusing primarily on my health, not so much every single thing I put in my mouth. The weight loss is a side benefit.
Maybe you can find the equivalent of your Diet Coke? Maybe it's bread, maybe it's sugar. Whatever it is, cut out that one thing (e.g. bread or sugar). For instance, if you cut out the sugar, don't limit your bread right now. Just get in the habit of not eating sugar-y snacks. Get your body used to that and then cut out something else. Keep going until you're eating healthy.
Carbo: It can be frustrating and irritating all rolled together. Sometimes we need to leave things in the past - your parents tried their best w/the knowledge they had to feed you at the time.
Introducing one new thing to your lifestyle is a good idea that the others have suggested. Even walking a bit each day can help.
Doctors will tell you low carb is the way to go to drop weight (I've had to during pregnancy, it works, but it can be hard if you are a sweets person, however I found I wasn't hungry all day when on it like I thought I'd be), but you might actually be one of these people who need a little of everything in moderation. Is it possible for your doctor to refer you to a dietician in your clinic? I know my DH has struggled as an adult w/weight. When he went she didn't pigeon hole him into one particular diet, rather she asked what had worked for him in the past, she asked that he keep a food diary for the week so she could refer to it to see food choices and then they worked on a plan that would work for him, tweaking as he went along with the end goal of weight loss. I know for me on this journey, it's been more about realizing the quantity I have been taking in over the years. I have come to the conclusion that my eyeballing method was way off . I too worked w/a dietician when I did mine. Even a refresher course in what a proper serving size is can be a help. Sure it sounds like more work when it comes to meal prep, but if it can bring yourself back to enjoying food in moderation then feeling it's out to get you, it might be something to try. Also, if it will help your journey out - have your wife come to the appointment if she's the main meal prep person. It can be a lot easier if your all on the same page and direction and your own personal cheerleader to boot.
One other thought, do you just have three meals a day, or do you incorporate snacks in it as well?
My frustration is that things that worked in the past don't work this time around. Not sure if it's my age or that the body has changed some. But I am trying to do better in my feelings towards all of this and find something that does work. Just know, you can do this!
Thanks guys. I think I am feeling a little better now. I know I will never look like I did a long time ago, just want to wear my pants on my waist instead of below it! It's hard to admit you need professional help, but that may be the next thing. When it comes to food portions I might be out of wack. Anyway thanks for the support. I might have a spark of willpower left in me, as I went to Walmart and didn't buy any junk food. I love the chocolate and licorice family so that's pretty big for me!
Yes I know the feeling. It comes after many years of dieting and failing. Some of us come to the inevitable conclusion (supported by all statistics like it or not) that diets cause more harm than good. You may be at a point where Intuitive Eating is a good option for you. It is not about weight loss. Instead it is a way to make peace with food, help you see that food is not the enemy and that food is neither good nor bad. Through dieting we form a volatile relationship with food that makes us fear it, like what you are experiencing right now. IE can help you neutralize your relationship with food and form a better view of your own body so that you can eventually make food choices that are based on what your body needs instead of what the diet dujour says you should do.
There is nothing wrong with you or with your body. Food is just food. I hope IE can help you the way it has helped so many of us!
Last edited by Palestrina; 01-13-2016 at 10:31 AM.
I think that same thing every day. Is living like this really worth it just to achieve that end result?
But what is that end result? So many times we strive for perfection as the end result, and that doesn't necessarily need to be. Maybe somewhere half in between is good enough, and that's OK.
There's a woman who used to come to these forums all the time (not sure if she does anymore) who lost 255 lbs and poses these same types of questions on her blog almost daily. It really makes me feel better after reading it - knowing you're not alone out there.
For me, it is indeed worth it. I look at my pictures at my high weight and I'm dumbfounded. Who the heck IS that person? It's not me. I so clearly am haunted and feeling horrible in those pictures. I can't even find pictures of me at that weight because I wouldn't take them. Now, I look like myself. Well, I might look even more like I'm meant to in another 10 pounds or so, but I just… I'm not meant to be a food-crazed maniac of 190+ pounds at 5'5".
Hi Swenea.
Whenever I've done low carb (14x now) I am pretty good for about 5 days. The hardest part is when real life kicks in. It makes so much sense when I read and watch videos on it. It's weird, I'll start LC then a friend invites me to their mancave for chips and beer and whatever game is on. Or, we get invited out for dinner and it's too much work explaining " I'm eating butter instead of sugar". Or the kids want chocolate chip pancakes in the morning with lots of syrup. Or even as simple as my daughter offering me a piece of gum and I have to refuse because it uses up some of my 20 daily carbs. It's way too hard when the family is eating pasta and garlic bread and I'm eating fried fish with lots of butter and salad. Also, meat, LC fruit and cheese is super expensive now. It costs me about $20 a day on LC. (Fish,shrimp, bacon,eggs,pot roasts, cheese,butter, mayonaise,etc) It's also hard because I am starving all the time on it. Even this last time when I overdosed on fat (pound of butter in 4 days). As fat supposedly keeps you full. Pretty much LC is like Chinese Food. Stuff yourself and an hour later you're hungry. Anyway I hope that helps.
Carbo:
Doctors will tell you low carb is the way to go to drop weight (I've had to during pregnancy, it works, but it can be hard if you are a sweets person, however I found I wasn't hungry all day when on it like I thought I'd be), but you might actually be one of these people who need a little of everything in moderation.
Yep - I agree with every word lemonthyme wrote.
From my side of the fence, yes, it's worth it. I'm approaching 60 in a couple months. I was sucessfull once long ago at getting close to a goal weight but for the most part, I've been overweight from childhood till now.
Looking at pictures never really phased me. I just looked like me, ya know? What changed and has made it worth it were the physical ailments that really started to impact my life. My knees and back hurt from the moment I got out of bed. Doing simple mundane things wore me out. Going shopping or to outings with friends was less fun because I'd have to take constant breaks to sit down and rest. That's what made it worth it for me.
Low carb works for a lot of people. I'm not one of them. A lot of people here are figuring out our own plan and tweaking as we go. I had to really pay attention to what I liked to eat and make it work in a more healthy way. Any plan that makes me feel deprived is something I'll probably give up on sooner rather than later. Our changes have been small but fairly consistant. The biggest key for a lot of people following their own path is planning. For example, if you know you're going out, plan on A beer - just one. Then adjust the rest of your eating that day accordingly. For DH and I, nothing is off limits - we just have to be realistic about things that are "treats" and know that treats aren't something we can do multiple times a day, 7 days a week!
IMO the other key is tracking. It's like keeping a household budget. You can't know where you might be able to save until you know where you're spending. Maybe consider tracking what you're eating for a couple weeks and see where you can make some reasonable cutbacks. You're a smart guy Every plan out there believes it's the best - but you do know what's healthy and know that you can fix yourself a couple eggs while you're making the chocolate chip pancakes and sit down and eat with your kids!
Best of luck in carving the road that gets you to where you wanna go.
Low carb is hard. I've met lots of people who try low carb over and over again but have never met anyone who actually sustains a low carb lifestyle indefinitely. It's too difficult and eventually people give up and gain the weight back. Plus doing this makes you form an awkward relationship with food and live in constant fear of it. Most diets do that but especially low carb because it vilainizes so many foods. Once you go low carb you can never feel the same way about a slice of bread, guilt follows immediately and it takes a long time to come back to grips with it.
I know my body feels best when I'm eating fresh foods, lots of veg and some carbs. I don't feel good when I eat too many carbs though and I feel pretty icky if I have sugar on consecutive days. That's just how my body works like it or not and so I try to give it what it wants. Moderation is difficult but for me it's the only way I can maintain my sanity.
Do you ever wonder if it's worth it?
. I too worked w/a dietician when I did mine. Even a refresher course in what a proper serving size is can be a help. Sure it sounds like more work when it comes to meal prep, but if it can bring yourself back to enjoying food in moderation then feeling it's out to get you, it might be something to try. Also, if it will help your journey out - have your wife come to the appointment if she's the main meal prep person. It can be a lot easier if your all on the same page and direction and your own personal cheerleader to boot.
Every plan out there believes it's the best - but you do know what's healthy and know that you can fix yourself a couple eggs while you're making the chocolate chip pancakes and sit down and eat with your kids! 