Already some great advice, but a big thing for me is eating the serving on the box.
So if my yogurt calories is 100 for 100g. I weigh out 100g and eat only that. If the calories on the milk is for 1 cup, I drink 1 cup (or less if its in cereal). This is the only way for me to do portion sizes. If the pasta is for 85g, I weigh 85g. If the cheese is for 30g, I eat 30g. If the box says 10 crackers is 90 calories, I eat 10 - not 12. I just find this easiest for me.
I don't ALWAYS eat the full amount, stuff like cheese or pasta I will eat less of. Or somethings more yogurt, but I use the serving on the box as my serving size. Of course only on good days - there are times when I am bad and I don't weigh. I just recently bought a digital scale, best $20 I ever spent.
I usually compare the portions on the label to what the Canada Food Guide calls for... it's posted on my fridge. Since I count calories I also often figure out how many portions of certain things I can get away with :P Things like cottage cheese, milk, eggs, and crackers... for whatever reason they're my weaknesses.
First, congrats on your pregnancy!! It sounds like your doctor is helping you plan well to maximize the health of your baby but minimize excess weight gain. (When you start off bigger, it's perfectly fine for the baby if you don't gain much as long as you are eating high quality calories).
As for portions, while I hesitate to recommend processed foods, I have to say that eating Lean Cuisines was a big help for me in re-setting my concept of portion size. I haven't been eating them this time, but I have in the past and I think that I was able to adjust my mental size of a portion a bit better. When you first start eating something like that, they seem tiny but esp. if you add extra veggies and/or a salad, they really can fill you up. But I do think it's healthier to not eat such heavily processed foods, so I think it comes down to using your food scale constantly and training yourself in the same way that Lean Cuisines helped me. Even when you make your own food, portion it out properly and then put the rest away. Promise yourself that even if it looks like not that much food, you can have more to eat if you are really hungry 30 minutes later. Chances are very, very good you won't be! But if you are, add some extra veggies or a piece of fruit to your meal, and you should start finding a good balance of calories that fits in your budget of 2100 and keeps you happy.
And yes, please completely ignore restaurant sizes! What you get on a plate for a single meal at a restaurant is frequently 2, 3 or even more servings.
Measuring cups and my normal plates/bowls. I poured water into the cup and the half cup, then poured them into my bowl, so I could SEE what a one-cup serving looked like, and what a half-cup serving looked like.
Took Play-Doh and put it in half a cup, then took it out and mounded it on my plate as if it's a pile of pasta or veggies. Same with one cup. (let Play-Doh dry so you have a permanent reminder!)
Portion control for me means to put 1 burger on my plate instead of automatically 2...I think since I started doing that several years back I have never had 2!
Making my plate in the kitchen instead of putting the food on the table, saving me from picking at it....
Eating chips out of a bowl instead of the bag....and putting the bag away after I fill my small bowl!
Realizing that when a recipe calls for 1/2 pound of cheese that doesn't mean I have to automatically double it!
Thanks everybody for all the wonderful suggestions!!!! I am going to work on the calorie counting, and I'm doing good on the scale, it really helps! I went out and bought the little measuring spoons that measure Tbl and tsp, and i think they are going to come in handy! I am also going to go to Walmart this weekend and look for the divided plates, I didn't ever think of that, but I know I can do it! I will keep working at it!! THANKS SOOOO MUCH EVERYBODY!!!!!
This sounds crazy, but I used to get really, really agitated when there was something I couldn't count. It took ten years for it to occur to me that when I can't count it accurately, I can (and should) opt to not eat it. It's like my brain always made the choice to eat something first, and once that had been decided I couldn't "go back" on that choice when I realized that for whatever reason, it would be hard to count accurately.
Now, if I am stuck in a situation where I need to eat something and have to make a spur-of-the-minute choice, my FIRST consideration is "what can I count?" I only think about "What looks healthy?" and "what looks good?" AFTER I've narrowed it down.
