I am so depressed and itís all my fault. Iíve apparently gained TEN POUNDS in the past two or three weeks (got a little inconsistent with the weighing there for a while, but itís been no more than three weeks). Two things:
1) I was pregnant. I mentioned it in a previous post. The pregnancy was not viable and I had to terminate. I had the procedure and since then I have been cramping and bleeding and feel downright crappy (sorry if TMI). It just feels like the worlds worst period.
2) When I found out I was pregnant, even though I knew that I would have to terminate, I let that be an excuse to go on an all out, eating competition style binge. For the past two weeks, Iíve stuffed my face non stop. I donít eat as much as I did before I started losing weight, but I know that at my lower weight, it will take less to gain.
But stillÖten pounds in less than a month? Seriously? I am so ticked off at myself. I look awful. I look bloated and chunky and my clothes are tight. It sucks. Itís funny because, on the way down, I was so elated to be 185 pounds. But now? I feel like I look like I did at 214! I am discouraged and scared that I will not be able to get back on track.
So, do you think that some of it might be water or pregnancy weight? I know that I have gained some real weight just from eating and not working outÖbut ten pounds just seems like a lotÖand I donít know if mentally I am prepared to handle the reality of that.