I think that being a "strong woman" and totally swearing off carbs and sugar is not possible.
I think we are all different...for me, it is possible. I'm by no means perfect, but I am so incredibly addicted to starch and sugar, I just can't have any. Period. Ever. Sucks, but that's life.
I think if having a day of eating what ever works for you, that's totally fine. What always upsets me, it's a purely personal thing, no offence intended, is calling it a cheat. If it's a regular thing, it's not a cheat it's part of your Programme.
We don't have to cheat ourselves, that sounds weak and negative. Staying on programme, like you are doing, sounds much better!
I cheat by drinking beer.
but I will also go o the gym and work a lil extra hard to make up for it.
i have broken the diet while I was out of town with my "friend"
but I made sure to hit the gym hard the next day.
Even if I do eat something not on my diet, I try to only eat half of it.
I have to pipe in here with my two cents. I have stopped coming to 3FC (except for a weigh in post I contribute to) because truly, I was getting tired of reading all the "you must never ever under any circumstance waiver off plan. EVER." kind of posts. I came back today to check things out again and lo and behold, here's this post.
FOR ME (and just me), eating what I want, in moderation, is working. I am counting calories and exercising 5 days a week. On the weekends I do not exercise, nor do I write down everything I eat. I am MINDFUL of what I am eating but I do not track every little thing like I do M-F. I have lost almost 40 pounds in about 5 months. Slow going, to be sure - but bottom line is I'm losing.
I like all kinds of foods - veggies, fruit, meat, pasta, and yes, sweets. I like to eat, it is enjoyable to me so I am going to continue to eat the things I like and work them into my plan accordingly. I've read and heard so much about making this a lifestyle change in order to be successful. I completely agree but I do not look forward to another 30 or 40+ years without an occasional cupcake! So my lifestyle change includes cupcakes - just not 4 or more at a sitting! In the past, as soon as I've said something was off limits, I became obsessed with it and had to have it. It was agony. I don't do that anymore and so far it's working for me. Might that change? Who knows, but I will face it if/when it happens.
I think what gets forgotten in quite a few of these posts is that nothing works the same way for everyone but we get judgmental when someone does something differently than we do it.
To go back to your original question, Jane - and I think a couple of people gave good suggestions/advice - go with how YOU feel about your "cheat days". Do they help you? Do they make you feel like you can get through the rest of the month? Do you look forward to and enjoy those treats? If so, I'd say it's working for you and you should keep on with it. If it causes you to feel bad at any point, then maybe it would be time to reconsider and change strategies.
I have to pipe in here with my two cents. I have stopped coming to 3FC (except for a weigh in post I contribute to) because truly, I was getting tired of reading all the "you must never ever under any circumstance waiver off plan. EVER." kind of posts. I came back today to check things out again and lo and behold, here's this post.
FOR ME (and just me), eating what I want, in moderation, is working. I am counting calories and exercising 5 days a week. On the weekends I do not exercise, nor do I write down everything I eat. I am MINDFUL of what I am eating but I do not track every little thing like I do M-F. I have lost almost 40 pounds in about 5 months. Slow going, to be sure - but bottom line is I'm losing.
I like all kinds of foods - veggies, fruit, meat, pasta, and yes, sweets. I like to eat, it is enjoyable to me so I am going to continue to eat the things I like and work them into my plan accordingly. I've read and heard so much about making this a lifestyle change in order to be successful. I completely agree but I do not look forward to another 30 or 40+ years without an occasional cupcake! So my lifestyle change includes cupcakes - just not 4 or more at a sitting! In the past, as soon as I've said something was off limits, I became obsessed with it and had to have it. It was agony. I don't do that anymore and so far it's working for me. Might that change? Who knows, but I will face it if/when it happens.
I think what gets forgotten in quite a few of these posts is that nothing works the same way for everyone but we get judgmental when someone does something differently than we do it.
To go back to your original question, Jane - and I think a couple of people gave good suggestions/advice - go with how YOU feel about your "cheat days". Do they help you? Do they make you feel like you can get through the rest of the month? Do you look forward to and enjoy those treats? If so, I'd say it's working for you and you should keep on with it. If it causes you to feel bad at any point, then maybe it would be time to reconsider and change strategies.
Couldn't have written this better myself. Kudos to you Mainah!
Why are you "cheating"? Who are you "cheating"? Why are you thinking of it that way, as though there is "the diet" or "the food program," and then there is everything else, which by definition is "cheating"?
I never, ever "cheat" because that's not how I look at things. What I do is PLAN. I am a calorie counter. No food is off limits. The only rule is, if I want to eat it, I have to count it. This is called "accountability"! So during my weight loss, I did eat ice cream, I did have dinners out, I did sometimes have some cake or a couple of cookies, and so on. These were NOT cheating, they were planned for.
Some foods I do not eat often because of the "trigger" aspect. Some foods I couldn't have around at first, but I can have them in measured amounts now.
The other thing worth considering is whether you are using food as a reward. That sets up an expectation that if you have been "really good," then you "get to eat the bad foods." What is that about? How does that help? What happens when you've lost the weight? Do you go back to the "bad foods" all the time?
Just some thoughts. Everyone has to find out what works and what gets the pounds off. And then, everyone has to figure out how not to regain it, and that is a bigger challenge for some.
No, I do understand that she wasn't meaning it in any way. I should clarify - I'm perfectly capable of gaining weight eating what most would consider perfectly clean foods. I can gain weight primarily eating lean meats, veggies, fruit, whole grain products, etc. After all these years I've decided I have screwed up hunger signals. Even when eating maintenance levels, I'm still hungry. Even when gaining weight, I'm still hungry. So, unlike the comment about not needing junk food to live (I agree), I still need food to live. I can choose to limit how much I eat, but I still need to eat.
When I'm losing weight I choose what I eat, as it fits into my plan. The reality is I eat well (probably more calories than most would think), but there's always that possibility that I won't control my intake. I am glad that some people get to the point where they don't desire to overeat, but it's just not that simple for everyone else.
Oh, and I do agree with the poster who mentioned not liking the concept of 'cheat'. I admit I don't either. If I want ice cream (as I did on Monday when we were out of town) I choose to have it. I just make it modest, and cut back somewhere else. I'd honestly not have to cut 1200 cals out of my day's calories to have that pint of ice cream that I might have eaten in the past. On the bright side I make a fantastic fruit/yogurt/jam sorbet that people compliment me on (not maybe realizing that it's under 140 cals for a modest serving).
I have to pipe in here with my two cents. I have stopped coming to 3FC (except for a weigh in post I contribute to) because truly, I was getting tired of reading all the "you must never ever under any circumstance waiver off plan. EVER." kind of posts. I came back today to check things out again and lo and behold, here's this post.
What post are you talking about? I re-read every post, and I never saw one that said a person must never waiver off plan? I didn't, but that's because I wanted to get rid of the weight as quickly and as healthfully as possible. I didn't want to be fat another minute longer than I had to be. I realize that some people really do think they need certain foods to live a fulfilling life...and hey, that's great. I think someone needs to keep the grain markets up. Living on a farm, my bread and butter is your cupcake...
My controversial post was in reference to a post that said that people will binge if they forbid themselves of their favorite foods. My reply was no, I didn't. Period.
In the past, as soon as I've said something was off limits, I became obsessed with it and had to have it. It was agony.
Okay. We really are different and I don't see one person saying that we aren't. We've all got to find our own way without a doubt, 1000% percent.
Like LoriBell and Glory, saying no was not agony. It was freeing. So no, "cheating" was out of the question for me. My life was on the line. I didn't want to leave my children motherless and "this time", I wasn't taking any chances. In previous (lame) attempts, leaving the door open for "those foods" was a recipe for disaster. Been there, done that. Being the addict that I am, it didn't work - for ME. And hey, I'm the only one that counts here. Making certain foods off limits during the losing portion of my journey was the most freeing, liberating thing I could have done. When devising my plan, I knew right off the bat that the only way I could succeed was to eliminate the foods I overate the most. The ones that made me want to shovel them down my throat. Once I made them definite NO's, well there was no more thinking about it. Ahhhh. Freeing. Freed me up all the way to goal in fact.
It's not for everyone. But it was for me and lots of others. Others who have taken that method all the way to their target weight and kept it there. So although it's not the ONLY method, it most certainly is a PROVEN method. I'm not sure why that approach is always slammed around here.
And the funny thing is, you never hear one of them, myself included say things like - "it was awful, it was agony, it was deprivation, it was too restrictive, my cravings were insane, it was so hard". Each and everyone says it was the best thing they've ever done. Hands down. No questions about it.
Yet it gets slammed, continuously. Whatever.
To the OP. Find what works for YOU. Experiment. Record or log, so that you know how you felt afterward. If it set you back or not.
The good thing is, we can always change things up and keep on working the plan to work for us.
i agree. i'm trying to do the whole thinking like a thin person thing when it comes to cheating. most thin people if they want something - they will eat it but they just won't stuff themselves/overeat. i won't restrict myself, i'll eat something if i want it but just less of it and i'm conscious to make sure that i'm not eating it for emotional reasons. that has worked for me so far.
I don't cheat. I use to think that if I didn't have a 'cheat' day or add somethings once it awhile I would in turn be making myself want them more but I've found that when I was doing that all it did was make me crave them more.
I look at it like any addiction, once you give it up everyday gets easier and if you slip up or cheat it's like starting all over again, cravings come back, etc. (at least that's how it is for me).
We do seem to discuss this topic frequently around here, and it does seem to ruffle feathers!
While I don't think anyone is saying their way is the ONLY way, sometimes when we talk about things that are so central to OUR success and so important to us, we might perhaps come across that way, unintentionally.
Perhaps it's best for all of us -- posters and readers -- to remember that our form of communication here on the internet loses a lot of the nuance of face to face communication. Perhaps our mantra should be: "Try not to ruffle feathers, nor to be ruffled in return."
It's not for everyone. But it was for me and lots of others. Others who have taken that method all the way to their target weight and kept it there. So although it's not the ONLY method, it most certainly is a PROVEN method. I'm not sure why that approach is always slammed around here.
And the funny thing is, you never hear one of them, myself included say things like - "it was awful, it was agony, it was deprivation, it was too restrictive, my cravings were insane, it was so hard". Each and everyone says it was the best thing they've ever done. Hands down. No questions about it.
I think that's rather circular reasoning. Of course you don't hear it called deprivation by the people who love it Just by the people who do experience it as deprivation. Correspondingly, you never hear the people who take moderation/whatever you want to call it, all the way to target and maintenance, calling it agony.
Quote:
Originally Posted by rockinrobin
Yet it gets slammed, continuously. Whatever.
I think that's tunnel vision. It most definitely goes both ways "continuously." Do you seriously think otherwise? I rather feel like "no cheating/whatever you want to call it" is in general the more accepted and promoted approach on these forums - but I think it just feels that way - I think in reality we are each probably just more sensitive to our own issues.
So during my weight loss, I did eat ice cream, I did have dinners out, I did sometimes have some cake or a couple of cookies, and so on. These were NOT cheating, they were planned for.
