[saef]

Awareness is being present. Obsession is never being present.

JayEll, thanks for giving me something to ponder for a couple days at least.

I struggle with obsessive tendencies. I have been reading a lot lately about mindfulness.

I'm so glad you wrote your post, Optical Goddess. I go through moments like that also. For me, though probably not for you, it's tinged with self-pity. The voice in my head says: "Poor me. Why is it harder for me than for other people? Why do I set these standards for myself?"

[JulieJ08]

Originally Posted by JayEll

Awareness is being present. Obsession is never being present.

Ah, I missed that the first time through. Really excellent point. I thank you too!

[jamiec0926]

I can definitely relate. I feel like I have been so obsessed about my weight that I have lost a couple of great relationships. I definitely wish I could go back and do things differently with him and my weight obsession.

[jamiec0926]

Love your post JayEll. Thanks for the inspiration.

I am so glad I joined this forum. It definitely helps me to read posts and realize there are other people out there who are struggling with the same things I am. I have gotten to the point where I feel so disconnected from everyone and life in general because I "hide from life" since I have gained so much weight.

[judipurple]

This thread is a shining example of why I am here - the original post could have been written by yours truly...and the responses are what I need to take in, ponder and own. Thank you, all.

[healthfreak]

If you can manage, make an honest attempt not to dwell on losing weight, on what you are eating, or not eating. If you have an active life style that includes enough exercise, you can take up this mindset and not have to worry so much about losing weight all the time. If you eat more on any given day, then you simply increase the time that you work out in order to counteract the extra calories. Be practical and you'll have an easier time losing and keeping weight off.

[aneleh]

I think about it aaaall the time pretty much as well. I think my relationship with food was fixed when I was a kid, and I'm always going to be swimming upstream, so to speak, to fight those thoughts and habits. I don't think I'd ever be able to just stop and be normal, but I've realized it and am fine with it. Everyone has their own personal struggles, weight is just an obvious one to the world.

[dragonwoman64]

I still have a ways to go weight loss wise, and I do feel like I need to be more mindful of my calories and exercise in order to consistently lose weight. I tried to get around that, feeling like I was being too obsessed, but maintained instead of lost weight.

There's a book (and theory of approach) called Overcoming Overeating
http://www.overcomingovereating.com/ They deal with dieting and body image.

you know, the time and effort put into taking care of a kid or parent, an animal/pet, garden, or even a car can feel like a labor of love. We're just as worth it if not more (if you don't take care of yourself first...) When a car or garden (or even a pet that gets bad habits) gets out of whack, it may take more of an effort for a while to get it back in balance. Like a mindset and metabolism.

[prinny]

Oh I have the same body image problems and always have. I have problems with having the problems too.

My biggest issue with never having conquered this is I turn 40 this year andI have self image issues relating to AGE, well not a damn thing I can do about that but I decided to not be 40 AND fat. *sigh*

I know as I get older this is going to be harder and harder for me. I can't just accept the natural changes you get over time. I even have fewer wrinkles than most women my age because I stay out of the sun, never really smoked, etc. Most people think I am in my lat 20's or early 30's. That doesn't matter every little wrinkle and line screams at me and makes me miserable. I wish I knew how to get past all this because it makes me miserable.

How do you learn to accept things like that? I have never been able to figure that out.