Hi Everyone -
I'm new here and I will apologize ahead of time because this might be long. I am really, really depressed tonight and I just need some advice.
I have been overweight my entire life. I have a best friend who I have known all my life, she is also overweight although she is much bigger than me right now. My friend has made the decision to have weight loss surgery and has been talking to me a lot about it. I am now wondering whether I should just suck it up and do it.
Back about ten years ago, between low fat and low carb dieting and lots of walking and weight training, I had gotten myself from 350 down to 250. Although still overweight, I felt great. I ended up hitting a plateu and when I went to see an endocronologist to find out why, I found out I had PCOS. I started different courses of meds and slowly started gaining some weight.
Then I met my wonderful, very skinny crazy metabolism husband about 5 years ago. Without even realizing, I started packing weight back on as I ate away with and baked for him. I gained almost all of it back. I still can't forgive myself for that.
We have been trying desperately to get pregnant but with the weight and the PCOS, it has not happened.
I am so utterly torn right now. I am miserable at this weight, back to the place where I fear small plane seats and have no clothes that fit. I know that weight loss would also increase my chances of getting pregnant.
All this said - as great as weight loss surgery sounds - something in me feels like it's just not right for me. I have done it - why can't I do it again? However, losing so much weight so quickly sounds like a dream.
I am just very lost tonight and very down. I really need support and advice to help me figure this out. I am grateful for anyone who can help.