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Crisis of faith

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Old 01-31-2007, 12:17 PM   #1
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Default Crisis of faith

I've been noticing a slight lack of enthusiasm the past week or so DESPITE breaking 150, DESPITE getting back into my prebaby jeans. (despite having now found a total of $30 in the pockets of those jeans)

I am now in the weight range that I have battled with for years. I'd say I've spent at least 80% of the last 25 years between 142 and 156 (closer to 156 in the last 10). I've crapped out on numerous diets in the mid 140's

Everything about this time is different. This is the first time in my life I have lost weight without feeling deprived. This is the first time in my life I have lost weight at a reasonable rate. This is the first time I have been this consistant this long.

And yet, deep down, I dont believe that this time will be different. I keep expecting to go from 1.4-2 lb loss per week to stall/gain any second now. And its like I am fighting self-sabotage constantly so I can be "right"

I suspect the only thing to do is power through and stay the course and prove myself wrong, but its as demotivating to feel this way as it would be to see it on the scale.

My weight loss is slowing slightly, but I can still feel happy at this level
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Old 01-31-2007, 12:23 PM   #2
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Ennay, congrats on getting the baby weight off! That's a huge accompishment in itself. I'm wondering: were you a runner before like you are now? Were you this educated about healthy foods before and how many calories food has, etc? Did you have the support and focus you get from 3FC before? I think all of these things will add up to you reaching your goal weight, which is very reasonable and doable, and staying there for good. If you lose even .5 per week, you'll reach your goal soon enough. I know you've been focused and to me, based on your postings, its quite clear that you'll be reaching your goal before long (despite some bumps along the road..like the one I had last night at my grandmother-in-laws house).
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Old 01-31-2007, 12:29 PM   #3
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Oh, ennay, don't fret. This time will be different because you have all of us here at 3fc! We all have stalls when we get really close to goal. I was half a pound away on Thanksgiving and then gained 8 pounds by Christmas! It took me another 4 or 5 weeks after that until I began losing again (it was just this week!). Do you visit the Featherweight section? That area is for those of us that are close to goal and having a hard time getting off those last few pounds. I do know you travel a lot around the boards, so pop in there!

Take care.
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Old 01-31-2007, 12:42 PM   #4
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Oh ennay, I can soooo relate to your feelings. I'm 5'3 and I've spent most of my battle around 130-150. Higher around pregnancies. My most comfortable weight is about 128-133. (I've also been quite a bit lower than that.) I know that feeling of fighting self-sabotage. THIS is the time that I loose this weight and do it right. I have spent a lot of time anylizing my habits and patterns and for me, I discovered that my constant struggle is due to emotional eating and feelings of rejection. I haven't been on the scale in weeks now for that very reason. I feel a sense of failure no matter what it says.
You've done so well! Don't get down on yourself. Keep doing what you've been doing, and maybe if you feel like you need to, you could change your plan around or tweek it a bit. Use your success to motivate you and to keep going! Hang in there!
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Old 01-31-2007, 02:02 PM   #5
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Ennay, just by listening to your posts I have no doubt in my mind that you will take this thing all the way to goal. No doubts whatsoever. You are so educated and full of knowledge on the matter of weightloss. That's not gonna go out the window anytime soon or at all. I think it's natural to have some doubting moments every now and then. This is a journey and there are bound to be bumps along the way. No one ever said it was going to be easy. You have done so unbelievably well, the goal line is just a few feet away. You can and WILL do this. I know it's possible and deep down, so do you. Good luck on the rest of your journey. We're all here for you to help you in any way possible.
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Old 01-31-2007, 02:17 PM   #6
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You are doing great hun! Just keep it up! And remember this is a lifestyle not just a weight!
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Old 01-31-2007, 02:27 PM   #7
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Hang in there, ennay! It could be that you will hit a plateau, but the trick is, keep going, keep going, don't go off your plan, and keep going!

I hit a plateau around 180 that lasted for THREE WEEKS even though I was being very careful... I thought it would never end... Then one day bam, I dropped to 177, and now, a couple of weeks later, I'm at 174. So FINALLY it started working again. I think there are just places on the scale where to lose more weight, it's like our whole body has to rearrange itself or something. That's the only way I can explain it.

Stick with it! You CAN, you CAN!

Jay
P.S. The ticker changes everywhere in 3FC every time I make a change to it, so what you see below, if it says 174 CW, is as of today 1/31/07.
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Old 01-31-2007, 03:27 PM   #8
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Hey Ennay...I'll be rooting for you. We're at the same weight right now, and I have the same issue with stalls. My body LIKES being at this weight, but it's still not a healthy number for me, and it's not where I want it to be. So I guess I'm just going to have to prove once and for all that I'm more stubborn than this fat of mine.
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Old 01-31-2007, 03:48 PM   #9
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Anne, you have been one of the great inspirations on this message board for me to try to lose my weight again. I have all the faith in the world that you can achieve what you want to achieve.

I'm sick as a dog right now but I still read 3fc every day, and I expect to see your posts!
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Old 01-31-2007, 06:41 PM   #10
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I know--there is no logical reason to feel this way. Just those old demons rearing their heads.

I'm not even stalled at all, I am just EXPECTING it. I dont feel well today and that is probably contributing. I have the energy of a slug.

Mami - I've run for years, but I didnt get really serious until 2005. I probably ran more DURING my last pregnancy than in most other years. except maybe the year I took off 3 months between jobs and did nothing but workout. And I've always been pretty knowledgeable about food and nutrition, but I do think I have more knowledge about what works for ME (how many lowfat diets did I try? How long did it take me to realize that artificial sweeteners make me ravenous?)

And my metabolism is better than it used to be.

Alinell, I dont think I am quite ready for featherweight yet. Maybe when I get to 135 or so I'll swing in there.

I hope that if I just hang tight and continue to lose I'll get some faith back.

Dear god I have a headache...I swear the one thing that really sucks about nursing is not being able to take aspirin. Those other pain meds dont do jack.
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Old 01-31-2007, 11:54 PM   #11
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We all have moods, and this is just a low point for you. But remember - it's a mood. Moods are temporary things, and always changing. Your strength to do what's good for you - as well as the habits you've developed in learning to do so - are going to carry you through this.

Keep a move on, babe!
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Old 02-01-2007, 12:30 AM   #12
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Congratulations for breaking the 150 barrier! I haven't done that yet, but I am really close.
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