stephielou,
Hi, I don't know if you have read any of my posts but I am having a similar problem. I had been 5 years with out binging or purging. I suggest getting professional help. It really helped me out a lot. I am seeing a counselor now and I am finding a new way to get a grip on life. Not so much control it but just how to deal with it. If you need to vent or chat feel free. It always makes me feel better. We are all here to help each other. Post again so we can see how you are doing.
Love and Prayers