I am having a misserable, crummy day! Alot of things added up the last few days and I need to vent.
When I started this journey I never expected the mind game this all turned out to be. Eating right and exercising has been the EASY part! URGGG
First, I am stuck at 240- been there a couple of weeks- frustrating. Then a bunch of other frustrating things happen. Thinking I need an extra push, I email my sister asking her if she can come visit me when I hit 199 to celebrate onederland . she never answers - URG
Then a friend comes over who hasn't seen me a several weeks- tells me I am looking good- so I say- Oh, you can tell I have lost weight? I am WANTING to hear that someone can see it! - No, she says it is just your new dress- UGGGG of course it is my new dress casue it is SMALLER!!! URGGGG. Later she comments on how good my son looks- she can tell he has lost weight! He hasn't, but becasue we are both eating better and he is growing taller and no longer wider, he is looking better!
Then I go to the Dr. I am thrilled casue I know I have lost 30 pounds and my blood sugar is doing great, BUT they check my BP and it is 180/110????????????? What is going on- it was 130/90 BEFORE I lost the weight. So he puts me on a diuretic, but wait I read the info with it and it makes your blood sugar go UP- so I have to trade lower BP for high blood sugar?? No way- I am working too hard to keep my blood sugar in line without medicine, if I take the diuretic I will have to go back on the diabetes meds. My goal since I got diagnosed in Feb was to be off the meds.
I am just so frustrated today! I am eating great, walking 2- 3 miles several time a week, riding an exercise bike, overall living MUCH healthier than I ever have in my life. I just need a little encouragement and I can't find any around here- off to find the klenexx again- I'm sure this is another one of those cry all day days. Why can't weight loss be simple and not have all these emotional roller coaster rides!