I am back after a long hiatus (read, I just let it all go again
), but that is ok. My profile shows I last visited in October 2015. I just let it all go like I have done in the past and put any weight I lost back on and then some. I have paid the price, my weight ballooned past my previous high weight, which I tended to never go above for years and years. I gained a lot of visceral belly fat (the bad kind), I had no energy, very high blood pressure, elevated cholesterol, insulin resistance, foot and knee issues.
For many years I would always gain up to 230-240 lbs and then it would just stop no matter how bad my habits were. This time I just zoomed past 250, then 260, at my last doctor appt it was edging past 265, maybe getting older? I was literally in shock. Cue the downward spiral of shame and self loathing.... However, I eventually said to myself, need to get back on the horse no use beating yourself up now, I slowly started walking again. Introducing veggies and healthy foods back into my diet, etc etc. Then my doggy got sick and I had to put her down. I either wanted to eat everything in sight or nothing at all.
It has become more of a health issue for me now than an appearance issue, though I'd like to look nice. My blood pressure in particular was alarming to me, it was so high a few times. When I first got up and really elevated my heart rate again I thought I'd pass out. I am going to go back to lower carb because that is the only thing that worked for me in the past, and left me feeling good and not deprived. I'm talking about 100 g or so a day, spread out evenly among small meals and snacks, not atkins type. I have also decided that while I will keep a food journal I am not going to track calories or macros at this point, the numbers just stress me out. I know what types of meals and foods worked for me in the past and I will stick to those things. I also have a fitbit now with a daily goal of 10000 steps. Once again, i try not to get overly analytical about the numbers but I like the hourly step reminders and just seeing the differences in step counts when I am particularly active.
I have been doing good with exercise, and a lot better with food for the past month or so. I still eat some bad things but I find I eat a lot less of it when I do. Working to phase out all the processed junk and start eating a whole lot more veggies, fruits, lean proteins than I have been. I have not weighed myself, and I don't think I will for a while. I don't feel like I have lost much but I have noticed that my belly fat has gone all squishy lol. So it feels more cumbersome at the moment but that happens to me before I lose a lot of weight so I take it as a good sign (google "fat whoosh"). I go back to the doctor at the end of april and hopefully my weight will be down from last time and maybe I can get off blood pressure meds. Here's hoping. I am going to be reading a lot of posts and catching up with some people I remember from last time I was here.
Thanks for reading!