Hi Mamabaloo!
I just joined this site, today, too. Plus, I`ve gained and lost just as you have..so try not to feel bad about that. Sometimes it just takes a few good running starts, before we get it right.
You WILL find that the internet is a great place to get support and motivation! Nothing is better than being around others who are going through the same weight struggles.
You have lost the weight before..so there is no reason to think you won`t be able to do it, again! Difference being...this time turn it into a 'lifestyle change', rather than just a quick fix, and you will be able to keep the weight off for good!
See you out on the boards!