Moving is one of those life events that I am not sure you can stay sane through. I have a sibling going through the same thing right now -- or pretty close -- and this is my advice to you and her (I've moved a lot):
- Have a plan (timeline) of when things have to happen. Start working backwards (now) to figure out what has to happen when.
e.g. if the move is August 1, then you know you need to select the movers, packers, and insurance basically now.
- Declutter and get rid as much as you can, but not anything that your kids or your family will want later (someone else I know basically sold every last item they owned during one move and then regretted selling the baby clothes)
- Research your new city (if it's new to you) and get familiar with the stores, kid activities, and places you will frequent.
The Internet is a great thing! You can start reading reviews on daycare/helpers, best grocery stores, etc.
- See if your extended family will help you take care of the kids while you pack and do a lot of the preparations
If you can afford (or the company will pay) for you to travel to the new city for a house-hunting trip, take it (and have family stay with the babies). It'll be easier if you can find a house and have it in escrow/closing when you get there. Then the 4 weeks you have in the hotel, you can use to fix up the house, paint it or baby proof it, and then move your stuff and have it ready for the kids.
- Know it's going to be crazy and don't give yourself permission to use THAT to eat unhealthy. You need energy and to be sharp to get through and help the kids with the transition. In your timeline, schedule a massage or another relaxation activity to reduce your stress. Plan meals now on the worst days (moving day usually = pizza for the family and movers, which is not the healthiest food).
Good luck. It's a lot of stress.
I've been an expat and returned and gone back again and on and on, and I sympathize with what you're going through. It'll be okay. It won't be great, but it'll be okay.