Oh my, Scarlett, that sounds tough.
I know family can be complicated though so I'm sure you have your reasons for visiting during Christmas. May you find the strength and patience to handle all the drama this season.
The only holiday drama I have to deal with is my SIL and her jerk of a husband. They have a tumultuous relationship and every couple of years he'll leave her and my little niece around the holidays. He stays elsewhere and openly sleeps around town, telling my SIL that he'll come home when he feels like it. And she waits for him- I don't know if it's out of love, fear of being alone, or a fear of him (he's controlling and abusive). The family tries to support her and encourages her to leave him. Then they inevitably patch things up and start talking about having another baby.
So every Christmas we either listen to my SIL complain about what a huge jerk he's being or if they're together she brings him and we pretend like everything's great and listen to her talk about how amazing he is (so, so awkward
). Either way, I just bite my tongue because there's nothing left to say to her. The person I feel the worst for is my niece; that poor kid has been through so much.