LOL, well you know you are holding out on them. Why is it that you won't tell them the truth, show them the way and lead them to the light. You know that secret path, the one with all the short cuts. The pill, the potion, the person with all the answers. One thing I remember Oprah saying that has stuck with me for years...if there was a pill, a shortcut, another way...she would have already paid the man and told us all about it.
Psh, no way am I sharing my secret magic juice that just swoooshed the pounds off while I shoved my face full of icecream and watched Game of Thrones over and over again. Hahaha.
DEAL. I've got a unicorn. Actually, my daughter does...it is a really cute one, too. My Little Ponies, Friendship is Magic style. You know that silly little girl show that has the strangest ever, teen cult following? Bronies. WTheck is that all about, anyway? Does anybody get it? I have two teenagers and I fear this cult--branded with Cutie Mark tattoos; may show up on our doorstep seeking my teenagers at any given moment. I had to buy Happy Meals for my teenagers so they could get little ponies and unicorns??!!
The ones that get me are the ones that I will tell..I lost 20lbs...and they say I wish I could do that. If I could "wish" it away I wouldn't be fat...but unfortunately I can't so I work my butt off at the gym and eat 1200 cals a day.
ive had so many ppl bail on being workout buddies and sadly im not even asking for someone to work out HARD, just go for a freaking walk LOL...i had one friend years ago who would call at the last minute and bail on our walk because "it was raining"...hello, we Live In A Rainforest!! it's gonna rain lol
i havent found a single person in real life who is interested in exercise, fitness, nutrition, health, anything at all sucksss
ive had so many ppl bail on being workout buddies and sadly im not even asking for someone to work out HARD, just go for a freaking walk LOL...i had one friend years ago who would call at the last minute and bail on our walk because "it was raining"...hello, we Live In A Rainforest!! it's gonna rain lol
i havent found a single person in real life who is interested in exercise, fitness, nutrition, health, anything at all sucksss
I hear you. I've had several people in my lives who wanted to be work out buddies, but all of them lasted less than a month or ALWAYS bailed. As much as I like having someone to work out with, I can do it on my own just fine. But at the end of the days its like "Stop asking me to be your work out buddy if you are just going to leave me high and dry!".... The worst is when you plan around THEIR schedule and it inconveniences you... but then they bail.
I found the most wonderful words to say, especially to my mom & it KILLS her-especially when we go out to eat, & I order
"I'm NOT on a diet! I'm NEVER on a diet!"
It literally shuts her right up!
Last weekend, we went out for breakfast and I ordered my usual scrambled eggs: 3 whites/1 yolk. The waitress looked at me like I had 3 heads, and my mother politely barged in on my order and stated, "She's dieting. She tries to make everything difficult."
I returned her politeness by saying, "No I'm not. I just don't like them so yellow." {That was partially true}
The waitress got the order right, while my mom scarfed down a highly-processed carb waffle!
I also use the "You eat what you like and let me eat what I like" quote very often.
I stopped offering advice a long time ago. Deaf ears suck the life out of me.
Yes, my best friend and my boyfriend are like this. It is so annoying anymore. My boyfriend will be on a diet for like two days and stop after it gets hard. You know like not eating junk and working out.
I know alot of these people. Complain they're fat and then go eat McDonalds.
Sigh. Famous lines:
- "Ill start on Monday"
- "My bodyframe is big so I'll never be a normal weight"
- "I think something is wrong with my thyroid" - Yes, I know some people really have problems with this but some just use it as a excuse.
- "I don't have the time to work out" - Yet, they sleep the whole day or watch tv for several hours.
- "I don't like salad" - This isn't the only food fit people eat.
- "I'm sooooo fat" - Like REALLY, what should I say? When I say "No, you're not fat" they complain and say "You're only saying that to make me feel better, I know you're lying". But let me dare say "Yes you are a little bit overweight" they freak.
- "I'll have the meal, with a super size soda" -
I know alot of these people. Complain they're fat and then go eat McDonalds.
I always have to laugh when I see people order a lot of fastfood and then go for a diet soda. I'm sure there are people that like the taste of diet better than the real thing, but ot that many people!
As for the issue at hand:
Even though it is frustrating, I think you have to stay supportive. Weightloss is such a touchy subject and it's so connected to how people view themselves. Do they have confidence they can change? Do they understand how it works? Do they have any self esteem? What do they want out of life? - All these questions come up when you think about drastically changing what you are doing. You wouldn't want to put them off by giving them the feeling they are 'less capable' just because they still struggle with taking the first actual step. They know they are not pulling through. They know they should but they remain inactive. It's really a tough personal battle each of us has had to fight. For some it's easier than for others.
I am not saying that you are responsible for them feeling good about themselves, but I think if you want what's best for them in the long haul you might just have to stay friendly and supportive even though you know they are not ready yet. Because the moment they are ready and notice you don't believe it, they might start doubting again and it will take another bunch of months/years before they reach that point. You are doing so well, you are their example and also their constant mirror. Everytime they see you they see their own lack of change. And they promise themselves to do better and they make plans with you. But once they leave and are alone again all the energy can just like that disappear in blur of negative or 'lazy' thinking.
Time, patience and support. And obviously you can come here and be super annoyed and we will then support you by saying we understand how annoying it is! Hihih
I hope one of them will eventually take that step so you will feel like you got something good out of your constant support. It will happen, I'm sure!
Time, patience and support. And obviously you can come here and be super annoyed and we will then support you by saying we understand how annoying it is! Hihih
Ahhh I have these friends too. One goes to the gym "to work off all the extra calories I ate this week" and then goes out for a monster high calorie meal with some icky dessert "because I've earnt it going to the gym". And then goes out drinking and munches chocolate and junk on Sunday to ease the hangover. Another one just eats utter junk and gets zero exercise and wonders how I have managed to lose weight.
The thing is, I used to be that person once. As someone already mentioned, I think you just need to reach that particular breaking point before you do something about it. Some people never do. I also remember how depressed it made me so I'm doing my best to be supportive and encouraging especially as two of my friends got inspired by my efforts and ARE actively losing weight. It's hard as there are times I just want to snap at them, but that won't make them feel any better so I count to ten and tell them I'm there to help when they're ready. So far, anyway.
I know it's frustrating because I'm in your place. At this point I can't deny I've lost weight (which I did in the beginning) and the questions and comments role in. I don't mind telling everyone exactly what I do, but the problem lies in the fact that people either don't believe me or say it's too hard.
There's a reason why I did this whole thing alone (well I had 3FC for about half of it). If I were still waiting for a workout buddy or a partner to help me stay accountable, I would not be where I am today. People who are constantly running to others and begging for their secrets and asking them to "train" them in the gym without having that drive just aren't ready.
Everyone here knows that the hardest part is actually starting and I'm sure we all had some switch that flipped that got us to start losing weight. I think someone really needs to be ready and unfortunately for some they're just never ready.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mariposssa
LOL, well you know you are holding out on them. Why is it that you won't tell them the truth, show them the way and lead them to the light. You know that secret path, the one with all the short cuts. The pill, the potion, the person with all the answers. One thing I remember Oprah saying that has stuck with me for years...if there was a pill, a shortcut, another way...she would have already paid the man and told us all about it.
SHHHH don't let them hear about the magic stuff!!
ugh there are women at the gym who corner me and then get pissed when I say "really, all I did was watch what I eat and exercise. You all see the heavy weights I lift too."
Then they say I'm lying and that they'll get bulky if they lift weights.
and sadly im not even asking for someone to work out HARD, just go for a freaking walk LOL...i had one friend years ago who would call at the last minute and bail on our walk because "it was raining"...hello, we Live In A Rainforest!! it's gonna rain lol
