I've always been a late bloomer. I didn't get my license until I was 21, nor my first job until I was 21, didn't meet my first boyfriend until 23. ADD/Dyslexic with a difficult time driving, so I just never did unless I needed to, and knew where I was going. Combination of inexperience, genuine lack of understanding/remembering rules of the road, being bad at directions, and panic-induced-even-more lack of understanding/remembering the rules of the road/directions kept me driving only to nearby places I was familiar with.
Recently moved to a new state with my SO. I can get to the grocery store, Walmart, and Walgreen. I know where a few places are, but not comfortable driving there alone yet. This has screwed me in a big way regarding job searching. I only want to apply places that are close by that I know I can get to without getting into an accident or getting lost.
I feel like such a worthless piece of **** sometimes, and I hate having to rely on my boyfriend to get places. Not only does it make me feel like a useless pile of trash, it bothers me because he does SO much. He shouldn't have to drive me around, too. I feel like sometimes he expects too much of me, and thinks I just don't have any self confidence when it comes to driving -- I don't think he can fully understand what it's like to be an adult with learning disabilities. I think he thinks I doubt myself too much. He does push me to drive, with him in the car, which I do appreciate, but he doesn't understand why I can't drive it once or twice and have it memorized, or rely on a GPS.
They were doing open interviews today someplace. He must not have read the ad he gave me, because it was about 20 minutes away, to an area I've never driven. He has work in a few hours, so there was no way he could drive me. Neighbour couldn't, either. He looked up the easiest way for me to get there and that was about all. I wanted to try, really, but it just wasn't going to happen. I feel bad for letting him down, but I'm not about to put myself at risk. I hope he isn't too dissappointed with me when he wakes up. Instead of going to the interview, I applied to one of those find-me-a-job places, and a few other stores in the area I feel comfortable driving to.
I'm so tired of people telling me all I need to do is practice, or I'll be totally fine running a cash register even though I suck with money and only have a third grade math level...I don't like to underestimate myself, but really. I know what I can and can't do. And I just don't think people understand it's not something I can just pick up. You can tell me every day for a year how to do something or get somewhere and it either won't click at all, or it will click a while down the line while I'm doing something 100% unrelated.
Is there anyone else on this site that knows what it's like to be an adult with ADD? I feel so alone sometimes.