[Mimzzy]

I have been losing weight for 8 months now, I have hit my original goal of 130 and decided that I still did not like what I saw so I changed it to 120. When I started this 130 seems like a unimaginable number that I probably couldn't reach but with lots of effort I eventually did. Unfortunately, I guess I had far to many high expectations for what my body would look like at 130. I thought my stomach would be pretty much flat (Not abs or perfect, but not a "food baby" look), I thought my thighs would FINALLY not rub together, and I thought that maybe my back fat would not stick out so noticeably under my bra.

I wish I could say this stuff happened but it seems that nothing has changed after nearly 50lbs lost. My stomach still looks like a puffy jiggly marshmallow, you can still see where my muffin top starts. No joke, there is a noticeable indent where it starts protruding out from my side, sexy? I think not. I also have a enormous amount of belly fat on me. Don't believe me? I'll send you a picture of me grabbing a handful. My thighs? Sure they got smaller but they only got smaller in one place, now they just look disfigured. They look okay until you see about 4 inches above my knee where you will notice a bouquet of stretch marks(Not complaining about those since I did them to myself) and a oowey-goowey amount of giggly fat. All despite toning exercise and 4 miles a day running since summer. We don't even have to discuss my beautiful back rolls. They play hide and seek from under my bra strap while I routinely clean the crap out of my house in hope of burning just a couple extra calories. My body giggles mockingly at me, showing me that all my hard work and hours have pretty much gotten me no where.

Let my state that I did not expect my body to be perfect. I knew I would not look like a airbrushed super model or the girls in magazines, I was even aware that I would have to tone up to get the beach body I was going for. I was prepared for all of that. However, I was not prepared for the emotional drain you feel when looking the mirror and realizing that you don't really look much different even 50lbs smaller. In fact, Its extremely hard for me to even see any difference between me a 177 and me now at 130. Others say "your crazy, why are you trying to lose more weight? Your so small". I know they are trying to be nice but I can't help but wish I could reach out and slap that comment out of their mouth before they have the chance to say it. I can not stand when it when my mom says something like "Are you not happy with what you've got?". How can I put this nicely? NO! I am ashamed that after all this hard work I still look like this! I thought this would be my bikini body year, I mean I did start everything last summer. Well, if things continue the way they are going (no where) then I will once again avoid the beaches I long to be at.

I cannot help but be jealous of my boyfriend(A unfair comparison, I know), He eats all day and all night. What he eats is not even healthy! Two bowls of cinnamon toast crunch cereal, a bag of instant noodles and 2 frozen waffles with syrup for desert anyone? His other meals are not amazing but we don't have to get into that. Do you know how f***ing hard it is to sit beside someone who is crunching down on every single morsel of food in the house? Actually, I bet most of you do so I won't go into detail of the battle that is going on inside my head after he offers to get me whatever he's having. Yet his body is staying relatively the same! In 3 months he went from being flabby, to having a nearly noticeable 6 pack. 3 MONTHS! It takes me that long to lose 10lbs Here I am stuck eating all my delicious healthy lean meats and veggies. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy my food but sometimes I wish I to could indulge in a bowl of sugary crap cereal without the scale assaulting me the next day. I mean it, I have given in and let myself have a cup of cereal with some low fat milk early in the evening. I was greeted by a gain on the scale the next day. Why me body? Why wont you accept my treats without hating on me the next day?

My motivation has gone from hot to cold and everything in between but I have been consistently working out and eating healthy. When nothing was happening I decided I would invest in a Bodymedia Fit(Same as the Bodybugg, but a cheaper version). I set my calorie deficit to 1000 to start but found myself dying of hunger and lowered it to 750. Most days I hit this or more, some days I eat a little over my calories but there is ALWAYS some sort of deficit. I have the numbers to prove it now! You would think my hard work was starting to show through by now! Nadda.

So I said to myself "Fine, If you are not going to do this willingly then I will work HARDER for it". I then started the Insanity by Shaun T program, it sounded perfect. Cardio? YES! Whole body toning? YES! Intervals? YES! Crazy hard? YES! I have since been doing the videos while tracking my calories on my Bodymedia. The promotion for the videos says "BURN 1000 CALORIES AN HOUR!". I laughed to myself when I read this and said "FAT CHANCE! Maybe for someone who is 6'7 and 260lbs", I thought at least 400-450 for me though. I went into my first work out video gave it my all, nearly drown in my own sweat and tears, pushed until I nearly got physically sick. By the end of the video I was laying on the floor almost ready to call myself an ambulance. I picked my shaky a** up off the ground, forcing my muscles to move and looked at my calorie count........... 312, WHAT! ARE YOU KIDDING ME! I worked that hard for that tiny number? I can do that on the treadmill in 30mins instead of 45 and I won't feel like dying after. Frustrated, I climbed my *** on my treadmill to burn the remaining 200(I always try to burn 500 during a work out). Although I figured at least this will hopefully tone me up a little so I will continue with it.

I have been at this a week and a half now, how did my body thank me? By gaining nearly 7lbs... 7lbs that will not go anywhere, no matter how early in the evening I eat, how little or how much I eat or how much water I drink. I do understand that this is probably just water retention from the new intense work out but no matter how much I tell myself that, 7lbs seems a little to excessive to me. Everyone asks well I are you tracking inches? Why yes! Of course I am! Guess what? I have not lost any inches since November 2011. . I am trying to keep my strength up but am finding myself wondering more and more why the heck I am putting myself through this. I mean if my body wants to be fat, maybe I should just let it be fat. Obviously, I wont do this I refuse to go back to where I was last year but its getting harder by the day. Every morning I wake up with a grumbling belly and think "Maybe today is the day the scale goes down or I notice a difference". I have had no such luck, I can feel the scale laugh at me while the number rises ever so gracefully.

So here I go again, forcing myself to get off my butt to do a video that is getting me no where, will not burn enough calories and is actually making the scale rise. Then again sitting on my couch will do the same so at the very least I can say I am making an effort and still failing miserably.
I apologize for long, drawn out pity party, thank you for anyone who actually read that whole miserable thing.

[SensualSiren]

I totally understand how frustrated you must feel right now after losing so much weight and not getting the results that you want. One thing that may be important for you right now is stress. I know that I've had problems with stress causing me to gain or to not lose. (I recently gained back a lot of weight, partially due to stress.) A lot of people think about stress eating as being a problem, but stress also affects your metabolism and cortisol levels. You are obviously very upset about your weight loss journey, which could be causing you a lot of stress. I also stress about my weight loss, which causes me to not lose weight. You could probably help this by doing some yoga or regular stretches. Also, it would help if you slept more. Maybe you could get a book about soothing yourself and see what works best for you.

Another thing I noticed in your post is that you are hungry a lot of the time. If you are not eating enough to satisfy your hunger, then your body won't let go of the extra weight. It's so cruel! Maybe you could add a bit of low calorie protein or some greens.

I also wonder if you may have put on a bit of muscle doing the Insanity workout. I think it's supposed to build muscle. This may also be why your calorie monitor may not be reading very high when you are done (I'm under the understanding that they measure heart rate, but I'm not sure how that correlates to this kind of workout).

Anyway, I hope that you can break through this plateau. You've done too much work to give up now. If I were you, I'd go buy some new clothes that fit and flatter your new figure. Maybe a new outfit will help you see how much your body has changed already, even if you do still decide to lose a bit more weight.

[happybug]

Congratulations on coming this far! It's hard to stay motivated, especially when you can't see a difference, I know what you mean. Some days I still see a fat belly and think I'll never lose it, but then I try on some of my old clothes and they fit and I get motivated to keep going. But when you're keeping to the plan, and being extra careful and see no change on the scales, then I feel like eating McDonalds, and the only thing stopping me is waiting even longer to see a change on the scales. You're doing the right thing though, starting a new goal. Perhaps you might need to tweak your diet to get a boost on the weightloss. I will have to re-look my diet to budge these last two damn kilos. Good luck, don't give up.

[Theresa]

I'm sorry you seem to be angry/upset/discusted with your body. Depending on your age and how long you were overweight, you may get a bit of your loose skin to tighten, but you need to give it at least one year.

IMHO it sounds like you might be overdoing the exercising and your body could very well be in starvation mode.

I wish you the very best and congratulate you on your tremendous work losing your weight.

[QueenofThorn]

I don't have an answer for you, Isis, but I understand. I have the same plateau issues you do. (The difference is you seem to do shorter, crazy-intense workouts while I do long, somewhat less intense workouts but still what some people'd call crazy.) One thing about the flab you're seeing... Have you had your hormones/thyroid checked? Or are you on the Pill? I am on the Pill, and have had a helluva time losing anything at all. I will go to the doctor this spring to see if I have anything wrong with my thyroid.

[Mimzzy]

Originally Posted by NyxWriter

I don't have an answer for you, Isis, but I understand. I have the same plateau issues you do. (The difference is you seem to do shorter, crazy-intense workouts while I do long, somewhat less intense workouts but still what some people'd call crazy.) One thing about the flab you're seeing... Have you had your hormones/thyroid checked? Or are you on the Pill? I am on the Pill, and have had a helluva time losing anything at all. I will go to the doctor this spring to see if I have anything wrong with my thyroid.

I am on the pill currently, but its causing my hair to easily break and fall out. I got prescribed a IUD and will be getting that inserted shortly so I can finally go off the pill after 3yrs. If the problem continues I will probably get blood work done, but when I talked to my doctor about it he gave me a "Your going overboard" talk and told me I didn't need it because the weight I wanted to lose was only vanity weight.