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Binge Free Challenge: 2.21.11 - 2.28.11 - Finish February Strong!!

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Old 02-20-2011, 07:20 PM   #1
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Default Binge Free Challenge: 2.21.11 - 2.28.11 - Finish February Strong!!

Welcome to the binge-free challenge!!

This is a place where you can come in and talk about binging. Feel free to post about your successes and your struggles and keep track of how many days you've been binge free. You can also vent about anything and everything you feel like getting out. We are here to share our feelings and to encourage and inspire each other.

No negativity! We are strong chicks and I KNOW we all can do this!! And we don't have to do it alone, we have each other to get us through the rough times.

ALL chicks are welcome -- no one is excluded! If you are trying to lose weight, not trying, maintaining, recovering from an eating disorder, in the midst of one, or have ANY kind of problem with food, we would love to have you join us!! Please do not hesitate to post your feelings. Jump right in head first!!! We WILL catch you!
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3FC Journey Began @ 249 lbs.: 7.30.10 ONEDERLAND!! - 3.30.11 From Obese to Overweight - 5.3.11
My Current Challenge: Regain my focus! (Getting there...) Get back to my low of 182.8
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No longer Overweight = 164 I'm comin' for you...

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Old 02-20-2011, 07:34 PM   #2
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Day 22 today!
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HW - 286!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (somewhere over 130kg as thats as high as the scale i had went. )
175.5 - 18/4/2011... LAST 10 POUNDS
GW - 172 (78k)
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Old 02-20-2011, 07:43 PM   #3
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Yesterday I was on day 17 and then a friend asked me if i wanted her to pick up anythng from mcdonalds, and i said yes, I ended up eating an apple pie, cheeseburger and crispy chicken sandwich, I'm not even ever really hungry for that type of stuff but because it was there I took it all! that was last night, afterward i felt sooo disappointed, in myself I have worked so hard and now look. I cried about it this morning but i guess I can't do anything but move on, I just feel like i ruined all i've been working for like how far did that set me back grrr i wanna punch myself in the face! but i'm scared to..
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Old 02-20-2011, 08:04 PM   #4
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Day 9.

No worries, cheeriloos, there's no way we can be perfect in this weight loss journey. Think about it this way: you were great for 17 days, and slipped a bit for one. That's a great percentage to the good! Just put it behind you and get back on track now....
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Old 02-20-2011, 08:16 PM   #5
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Right after writing my "Day 6 over" post I willfully ate gummy worms. Like I sat there thinking about it and decided it was a good idea. It really wasn't, but it wasn't a binge either. Still dangerously close.

If I make it through today, it will be one week
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Old 02-20-2011, 08:33 PM   #6
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Finished my half marathon today and had a BLAST - then went to brunch with friends and survived the buffet - didn't make totally healthy choices but ate less than I had planned on eating (had 3 mimosas ) Then disc golfed all afternoon with my fiance and now we're preparing chicken for healthy salads to balance out our indulgent morning - All in all a GREAT weekend, a great race and I'm just grateful that my eating has been going well. I've been catching myself supressing certain emotions/thoughts then back tracking and consciously letting myself feel however I'm feeling. There's some relief to it.

If all goes well tonight, I'll still have a deficit of around 500 calories for the day which is a victory considering I had planned on just eating back all I burned.

Let's start this week off right ladies!

Today is Day 13 so tomorrow officially 2 weeks
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Old 02-21-2011, 01:31 AM   #7
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Well guys I am successfully completing day 3! I had a HUGE victory this morning. My dad's house has always been a trigger for my binges for some odd reason. I guess its because he always keeps junky food around. So today when I went over there this morning I felt that "itch" to look for food and scour the cabinets for "bad" sugar rich foods and whatnot...my dad keeps a ton of carbs around his house and I ended up finding some huge prepackaged blueberry muffins. As soon as I found them my mind was persuading me to eat one--which if you are like me, would have turned into all out calorie fest after I give into one of them. I can not tell you just how hard it was for me turn these muffins down guys. I even unwrapped it and everything. I probably stared at it for a good 20 minutes. I was telling myself I could just start over tomorrow and all this other stuff trying to sabotage my diet. Finally I decided that starting over (I was already starting on day 3!) would be harder than throwing the muffin away altogether. I am so tired of starting over. I decided that I want to feel good about my body and I began to remember that binging would not get me there. I feel bad for throwing good food away but I would have been more angry at myself for eating it. Also, when I did finally throw it away I felt sooooo angry for some reason. I was mad that I couldn't eat it. I was mad that I was even in that situation--that I have to deal with such crazy cravings. I was just...mad. I guess the best way to describe it was a toddler not getting what they want and throwing a temper tantrum about it. It just makes me wonder if any of you guys have felt that way. However after that whole ordeal I felt stronger than ever about my diet. I did good and I definitely feel proud of myself for saying no.
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Mini Goal 2: 160 lbs -ACCOMPLISHED:6/28/2010
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Mini Goal 4: 145 lbs (10 lbs to go!)

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Old 02-21-2011, 01:37 AM   #8
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Yes, I probably have one internal rage-tantrum AT MINIMUM most days. I do that whole process too where I frantically run around a store reading the calorie counts on ALL the candy bars, cakes, cookies, packs of junk foods, crackers, etc. I'll be in there for a good twenty minutes talking myself out of getting "Calorie Bomb A" and settling for "Only Mildly Calorie Bomb B." I can't tell you how many times I've walked into the drugstore going "CHOCOLATE COVERED AAAAAALMOOOOONDS" and walked out with a Soyjoy bar or beef jerky.

the moral of the story Chipmunk Cheeks is that you really beat the odds and moved ahead in refusing the muffin. I hope it gets easier from here on out but even if it doesn't, you know what you are capable of - saying NO!
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Old 02-21-2011, 02:19 AM   #9
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Krampus, it's sooo unfair! I have plenty of skinny friends that eat junk food all the time. I also have friends that just don't crave food as much as I do. It feels like I am always thinking about it. I am hoping the muffin thing will be only ordeal for the week...we will see.
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Mini Goal 1: 169 lbs (Lowest weight in several years--circa 2005-ish)-ACCOMPLISHED:4/26/2010
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Mini Goal 4: 145 lbs (10 lbs to go!)

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Old 02-21-2011, 02:26 AM   #10
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I am signing in again - this is day 2 for me.
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Old 02-21-2011, 08:00 AM   #11
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back to day 1 again... thanks to the ladies that supported me on the other "What i ate yesterday" thread!!!! you have such wonderful points and I do have to remember that I can do this and have done this in the past... i am disappointed that i am letting myself down. i had such a good run on friday and then even went to hot yoga for the first time...then binged... what the ****! seriously messed up!

i am soooo freakin scared of this sinus surgery. my therapist says i have mild PTSD around medical issues and "death" ... long story but i dont deal well... so here i sit, 8 am, at work, full of crap crap and more crap from last night...

okay, going to focus on positive - it is sunny, there was almost no traffic (holiday for some today),

promises to myself: i WILL NOT binge today, i will acknowledge the fear i am feeling, i will move out of the tv room after dinner, i will tell my bf that i am going back on plan and that, after a while ON plan, i will consider reducing again (but i need to be on plan for a while, maybe a month, before i'll consider reducing at all...)

i hope you all treat yourselves with respect today... i know we all deserve to be treated well, ESPECIALLY by ourselves!!!

monday hugs!!!!
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Old 02-21-2011, 08:39 AM   #12
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Back to day one today. I feel so devastated and angry and just plain lost. Yesterday was so weird because my binge felt very controlled. It was like I wanted it to happen; I wanted to punish myself and make myself feel all this pain and depression. Sometimes I think that binging is my way of separating myself from people: from my husband and my family and my friends. Ugh. I feel so physically sick too.

Sorry to blather on -- I just need to get this out so that I can start over. But why is it so hard to forgive myself and move on?
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Old 02-21-2011, 09:18 AM   #13
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spingirl - I TOTALLY understand how you feel today!! i am feeling exactly the same way!! i have worked soooo hard to lose the weight, to get fit, and healthy. I was just thinking about how i didnt hvae any junk food for over a year, not a single piece of anything (including birthday cake etc) and here i am, 140lbs lighter but binging...what the ****! i had the strength at 320lbs to say no to food and now i don't... hmmm... must stop giving myself permission to hide behind food !

what emotions are you hiding from? i am scared... i know it... why are you trying to hide from everyone??? is there a better way to hide? (sometimes we all need to hide, i know i sure do, but i need to find a better way to hide!)

big hugs!!!!
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Old 02-21-2011, 09:44 AM   #14
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Hi ladies - I definitely did some emotional "I'm not really hungry" eating this weekend but no binging and did pretty well calorie-wise. I always get anxious/grumpy/moody the night before a long run or race and sometimes eat way too much.

I said today was 2 weeks but it's Day 13 for me. These past 2 weeks have been so much happier/better than if I'm binging and not taking care of myself. 2 weeks ago today I spent the entire day sitting in my couch in my bath robe, covered in my down comforter eating cereal. Numbing myself. Not letting myself feel what I was feeling.

And I get anxious thinking about the what-ifs. But I keep praying that God will just work in me, help take away the desire to binge, the desire to use food as a coping mechanism and help me continue this pattern.
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Old 02-21-2011, 10:08 AM   #15
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Checking in for day 5.

Spingirl9: I have been in your shoes many, many times. Perhaps it's the emotional weight of responsibility you'd like to shed for a few hours...or hide from your wife/friend/daughter duties for a while and just disappear into your own world. It's good to try to pinpoint what it is to determine if it's something that needs to be worked on. I've realized a lot of things about myself by enhancing my self-awareness and there are issues I've been working on. When I tackle those, I feel I am in more control of what I eat. Hope this makes sense.
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