My boyfriend is making healthy lifestyle changes with me, he is doing great, probably has about 50 more pounds to go. When someone offers him bad food like pizza, wings at the bar, onion rings ect. he has a will of steel in saying no thanks. The other day I asked him how he did it and he said, "I've had it all before, I know what it tastes like."
For me THAT is my problem, I've had it before and it is delicious, so I want it again! But for him it works. He said if someone offered him a bite of some entirely new dish or food, he would have a taste of it to know what it's like, but the otherwise he's sticking to his healthy stuff.
So... his mantra of, "I've had it all before, I know what it tastes like." doesn't really help me. But it has worked wonders for him and I thought someone here may benefit.
My husband and I also think very differently about food and eating. He will restrict his intake but allow lots of treats and still obsesses about food he wants to eat. He does NOT want to make the necessary changes to lose all of his excess weight and stay there. For him, the answer is in exercise, and firmly believes he can get thin and maintain his weight through running. He has not run in 7 years.
I believe in a strict diet and learning what I need to know to take the weight off and keep it off. I am willing to to accept the changes I must do. I do not obsess over what I can or cannot eat and I do not think that things will somehow fall into place when I am at goal. I will have to restrict and monitor my eating for the rest of my life. While we will become more physically active in the future, we are aging and that activity level will be geared towards our age and abilities.
He still thinks he can still attain what he was when young. I seek to find peace with the realities of aging and massive weight loss. It just isn't going to bring me youth and a gorgeous body. So we differ like night and day on all these issues.
I liked your husband's concept though. I have actually used this idea in my own changes, realizing that I can enjoy the smell or look of food without having to having to consume it each and every time I see it.
When I am invited to people's houses for a meal, I often compliment the hostess or cook on how lovely a food item they made is, how much work must have gone into making it and often there is no dismay in my not eating it if it does not fit into my plan. Appreciation can be enjoyed in any case.
OP, I think ALOT like your boyfriend. It comes from eating sooooooo bad for soooooo long. You've ate until your hearts content. I used to eat Mickey Dees every single day! I ate Baskin Robbins by the Quart (hand packed) every other day over the summer...I've endulged in ALL of my favorites (chinese, jamaican, fried, stewed, saute'd, you name it!) to the point that it's just not that appealing considering the CARNAGE it left behind!
It's like chocolate. Ever had a real bad taste for chocolate, but then you ate an entire bag of M&M's (the large family sized one) and vowed to NEVER eat chocolate again? The smell of it made you sick...right? Same principal applies.
Now, I find that although I'm completely done with McDonalds (other than the salads (bacon ranch..YUM!) on occassion, when I do endulge in some of my old favorites, it's ONE meal per week and I exercise portion control. I enjoy and appreciate those same foods a whole lot more and it doesn't interfere with my ability to lose weight and feel good!
Hope this helps someone
Last edited by joyfulloser; 11-24-2010 at 11:17 AM.
Reason: spelling
when i'm considering if i should eat (or not) something very unhealthy i think about how much fat is in it. how i'll feel afterwards. you could say the same for carbs, too much salt etc.
for me, when i eat a corndog, it makes my stomach hurt and i feel so fat. so i leave the area to get away from the smell.
if i decide i do want a small amount of the unhealthy food, i try to think about how much exercise i'll have to do to burn it off. i rarely exercise after i eat, so usually it's just not worth it to me.
recently, i started practicing closing the door. rockinrobin and many other 3fc ladies swear by not having any, which takes away temptation.
i tried this with halloween candy, papa john's pizza, corn dogs...
i'm happy to report i didn't eat any of my kids' candy or eat ANY delivery pizza or corn dogs.
i don't have to negotiate with myself. just no. i just don't need any.
That idea is brilliant!!!
I will start thinking of food the same way... Before whenever I start to crave, I just scold myself and say "it's not good for you!!!" and I guess this makes me feel deprived. But if instead, I tell myself "you've had that before... let's try something else (healthy)" then it's more positive, right?
Thanks a lot for sharing!!!
Isn't it great when loved one diet with you too? My boyfriend recently started calorie counting and on days he's stricter with his calorie intake than I am it motivates me to do better!
It's nice that your boyfriend is working towards a healthier lifestyle along with you. And nice that he does it in such a positive way. My husband is crazy competitive and loses weight when I do because he has to win - and winnning means staying a couple of pounds lower than my weight. Drives me nuts.
LOVE this idea and thank you for posting! I did this unconsciously at Thanksgiving dinner last night. Only three things there I had never tried (roasted brussels sprouts with chestnuts and whiskey cream; polenta with wild mushrooms, coconut milk braised kale) so I ate those 3 items and left the rest. Turkey, I've had it. Stuffing? Only so many things you can throw in there. Mashed potatos? Old news.
Like your boyfriend, I should start applying this to new areas of my eating habits as well! It could motivate us to try new, healthy, recipes as well, I suppose, and get away from boring standards as we try to remain focused on our diet plans.
Thanks again!
Along the same lines I always say that 'it's not worth the calories' that works for me. I don't go into it just saying it makes it real to me. Quite a few people I know have started using this mantra as well.
And yes, I do splurge once in a while, especially if it's cheesecake, yum. I make my choices and stick to them.
That is really nice, thank you for sharing it! I will try to use and i think i works for me as well in the sense that new food and i new thing really do get me going as i like cooking and experimenting as well. So i will try - also I ercently have began to say - it is only food, it is no big deal, chocolate is so as big deal as i make it, neither chips, neither cakes, neither extra portion, it is only bloody food, why do i make out of it such a thing to worship - it is not!!!
This might help someone
