South Beach Diet - Selling Bibles- A funny for the day




little chick
04-14-2005, 10:13 AM
A minister concluded that his church was getting into serious financial
>troubles. Coincidentally, by chance, while checking the church store room,
>he
>discovered several cartons of new Bibles that had never been opened and
>distributed. So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from
>the
>
>congregation who would be willing to sell the Bibles door-to-door for $10
>each
>to raise desperately needed money for the church.
>Peter, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task.
>The reverend knew that Peter and Paul earned their livings as salesmen and
>were
>likely capable of selling some Bibles, but he had serious doubts about
>Louie
>
>who was just a little local farmer who had always tended to keep to himself
>because he was embarrassed by his speech
>impediment. Poor little Louis stuttered badly. But, not wanting to
>discourage
>poor Louis, the reverend decided to let him try anyway.
>
>He sent the three of them away with the back seat of their cars stacked
>with
>
>bibles and asked them to meet with him and report the results of their
>door-to-door selling efforts the following Sunday.
>
>When they got together, the reverend immediately asked Peter, "Well, Peter,
>how
>did you make out selling our Bibles last week?"
>
>Proudly handing the reverend an envelope, Peter replied, "Pastor, using my
>sales prowess, I was able to sell 20 Bibles, and here's the $200 collected
>on
>behalf of the church."
>
>"Fine job, Peter!" the reverend said, vigorously shaking his hand. "You are
>indeed a fine salesman and the Church is indebted to you."
>
>Turning to Paul, he asked "And how many Bibles did you manage to sell for
>the
>church last week?"
>
>Paul, smiling and sticking out his chest, confidently replied, "Reverend, I
>am
>a professional salesman and was happy to give the church the benefit of my
>expertise. Last week I sold 28 Bibles on behalf of the church, and here's
>$280
>I collected."
>
>The reverend responded, "That's absolutely splendid, Paul. You are truly a
>professional salesman and the church is also indebted to you."
>
>Apprehensively, the reverend turned to little Louie and said, "And Louie,
>did
>you manage to sell any Bibles last week?"
>
>Louie silently offered the reverend a large envelope. The reverend opened
>it
>
>and counted the contents. "What is this?" the reverend exclaimed. "Louie,
>there's $3200 in here! Are you suggesting that you sold 320 Bibles for the
>church, door to door, in just one week?"
>
>Louie just nodded.
>
>"That's impossible!" both Peter and Paul said in unison. "We are
>professional
>salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many as we could."
>
>"Yes, this does seem unlikely," the reverend agreed. "Please explain how
>you
>
>managed to accomplish this, Louie."
>
>Louie shrugged. "I-I-I- re-re-really do-do-don't kn-kn-know f-f-f-for
>sh-sh-sh-sure," he stammered.
>
>Impatiently, Peter interrupted. "For crying out loud, Louie, just tell us
>what
>you said to them when they answered the door!"
>
>"A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was," Louis replied, "W-w-w-w-would
>y-y-y-you
>l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to b-b-b-buy th-th-th-this b-b-b-b-Bible f-f-for t-t-ten
>b-b-b-bucks ---o-o-o-or--- wo-wo-would yo-you j-j-j-just l-like m-m-me
>t-t-to
>st-stand h-h-here and r-r-r-r-r-read itt-to y-y-you?
>


lateralus98
04-14-2005, 10:17 AM
Hahahaha! Too funny! :D

HunnyBee
04-14-2005, 12:13 PM
:rofl:


sweet tooth
04-14-2005, 12:41 PM
I just sent this to a co-worker and she came to tell me that it is the funniest one that she has read for months. She was laughing so hard, she couldn't answer the phone.

Bamiegurl
04-14-2005, 01:39 PM
Tanks Lil chick! FUNNY FUNNY FUNNY!