Living Maintenance - Maintainers Weekly Chat June 10 - June 16




BillBlueEyes
06-10-2013, 06:23 AM
I'm walking around feeling like Noah must have felt when the rains finally ended. The excavated hole for construction next door is still full of water - presumably we have slow perk soil around here.

Sending supportive thoughts to neurodoc for finding a path through the family dynamics of a teenage son. BTDT. The only solace I can offer is that my adult son now phones me ("the world's dumbest human being") to find out how to install a dimmer switch and repair a leaking sink.


Mudpie
06-10-2013, 08:40 AM
Good morning all. :wave:


We had a beautiful sunny and warm day here yesterday :D and I managed to get some much needed gardening done. :flow1:

Got a couple more bad (potentially) pieces of news yesteday and today. I knew about one (DH is depressed :( and confirmed it yesterday) and kinda suspected the second would eventually happen :eek: (banning of commercial dogwalkers from Toronto off leash areas). I'm not entirely sure what that means yet but have asked people to look into it and get back to me.

In the past I would have set off the alarms and run around in a panic :yikes: all day. Perhaps I truly AM getting older (definitely) and wiser (maybe). :p

This is pretty good for first thing Monday (and I had a smaller coffee this morning too!).

Dagmar :tired:

ICUwishing
06-10-2013, 08:51 AM
No complaints about the rain here - it's been at least a week for us and we were seriously due for a drink! Everything was covered in yellow pollen and needed a good rinse.

I'm chuckling a little at DS13 - he has finals this week, but because his school is off-synch to the local system, he starts summer swim practice tonight. Fortunately, he gets a break on Wednesday for "graduation". He needs a jacket and tie for the event, so I hauled him out to Men's Wearhouse. And learned that this gangly creature can wear a regular 36, and looks scary good in a well-fitted jacket! He knew it too, which is scarier yet. He demanded I take him for a haircut immediately afterward. :D Look out, high school ...

I'm getting used to the idea of Grandma in hospice; I was able to discuss the details with DH on Sunday without bawling. I need to go see her today or tomorrow, because I figured out what I want to say to her. The executive summary is that she has always set a supremely high bar for behavior and etiquette. In any given situation, I could always ask myself "What would Grandma do?" and come up with something concrete that kept me out of trouble. I want to thank her for that.


Megan1982
06-10-2013, 10:14 AM
Hi all,

TS Andrea passed by us on Thursday, giving us much-needed rain and no other damage. My tomato plants are very happy now. I'm glad it didn't cause any problems for you, Saef, or anyone else. We needed the rain so badly I won't even complain about getting myself soaked the whole day. Otherwise same old, same old here. Too busy at work and trying to keep a balance of all the usual chores, workouts, etc at home.

I've definitely fallen into my summer cooking (or lack of) pattern and am using more convenience foods, but I'm trying to take advantage of healthier prepackaged stuff and not give into the unhealthy prepared meals. I do eat a fair amount of chicken sausage, Jenni-O turkey burgers, scrambled eggs, pre-peeled shrimp and the like this time of year (I do eat a lot of boneless skinless chicken breasts that I cook in bulk but am just burnt out right now), along with tons of salads, fresh veggies and fruit. Anyone have quick easy dinner suggestions?

Jessica, how are the girls? Did Allison get to come home this weekend?

Becky, I'm sure DS's height will help him with swimming! Funny about teenage vanity. Does he have a GF yet? :hug: for you & your grandma.

Dagmar, how is your thumb? Having taken way too many biology classes in my time I'm very paranoid about antibiotic resistance, superbugs, and the like. I refuse to by antibacterial hand soap (regular soap and proper washing technique are fine!), and I won't even buy triple antibiotic cream, just single. My BIL is the type who literally keeps hand sanitizer in every room and it makes me want to sneak my niece outside and feed her spoonfuls of dirt to build up her immune system. Not literally of course, but you get the idea, lol.

I don't understand the dog walking thing. I've always thought dog owners are a very supportive community, and as someone with a very active dog, I am sympathetic to others who also have very active dogs and spend a lot of their time walking the dogs, looking for places to let the dogs run freely, etc. What is the reasoning to keeping commerical dog walkers out? If I lived near you, I'd totally be trying to make doggie playdates with you and the dogs, not keep you away!

Have a good week all!

alinnell
06-10-2013, 10:32 AM
I'm so envious of everyone's rain! Yesterday we had a day of high, thin clouds that did nothing but bring humidity so that we were unable to use our evaporative cooler. Regular AC has been on since Friday and that's just so expensive! Thank goodness for our solar panels, but the more we use AC, the more I know we'll have a bill come March. The first year of our solar our bill was $16. The second year it was over $1000. Granted that is for a whole year, and it is a whole lot less than $1000 a month which we would normally see in the summer (winters are around $400 a month). I shouldn't complain!

bargoo
06-10-2013, 10:39 AM
Allison. it was hot in Northern Cali, too. Over 100 degrees both Friday and Saturday,. We don't get bothered too much with high humidity here, though, so that is a blessing. My AC has been running a lot the last few days.

Mudpie
06-10-2013, 11:04 AM
Megan I hear you on the hand sanitizer. I only use the stuff to put on any nick or ding a dog or I get while out with me. And I'm sure most of my guys would love to play with Emma.

We do have a problem with some commercial dogwalkers bringing in large packs of dogs and then ignoring the dogs. They stand around and chat, mostly with other dogwalkers, and their combined packs can seem rather daunting to any dog owner bringing in one dog. I don't know how Emma would react to having 12 -14 big dogs running at her as she entered the off leash.

There are all sorts of other problems as well, like not picking up p**p, not even attempting to control excessive barking or other bad behaviours, and one walker yells obscenities at anyone who tries to control her dogs when they swarm and hump a single dog. I have had her F-bomb me on many occasions when I peel her hyper boxers off my submissive golden. She likes to get right up close and yell in my face so I can smell her cigarette and coffee breath. quite the charmer!

I wish the public would see the "good" walkers who also use the off leash. But sadly their perception of "commercial dogwalker" is largely based on the "bad" ones.

Dagmar :shrug:

Shannon in ATL
06-10-2013, 01:52 PM
Survived my week. Now starting another one. Whew. One day at a time is all I have right now.

silverbirch
06-10-2013, 05:33 PM
Shannon, I've cut your grass, virtually - with our shared push mower. Ours was knee-high. Yours was a bit easier. :)

Shannon in ATL
06-10-2013, 05:45 PM
Thanks Birchie! :)

Mudpie
06-11-2013, 08:09 AM
Silverbirch Could I schedule my lawns (I will have 4 soon) for the virtual clipping with your mower? You should have tremendous arm and upper body strength by the end of the summer that way. ;)

Dagmar :cool:

silverbirch
06-11-2013, 08:34 AM
{teeth sucking} Four lawns!!

OK, I'll see if I can fit you in as you did come recommended! :)

I actually felt it in my tummy. I think it's because my abs need more work and also because the grass was so out-of-control. May was very busy here, and it was warm and wet enough for everything to grow enthusiastically. Flowering was held back by the cold weather, though, and it's all happening at the same time. Quite lovely.

What does your new garden look like?

CherryPie99
06-11-2013, 09:34 AM
I checked my garden this weekend and everything seems to be growing BEAUTIFULLY! Including the weeds :mad:

So who's in to virtually help me weed the whole thing? There may be some fresh veggies for you in a month or so if you help out! :D

Jen

ICUwishing
06-11-2013, 10:33 AM
:wave: I like weeding, Jen - I'll help! Lawn mowing isn't so bad with a gin and tonic in the cupholder; I almost miss it. Not quite.

dagmar, my favorite technique for ***hats like the one you ran into is to go old school on them - take a deep breath, stick out your tongue, and spray the longest, loudest raspberry you can make right back in their face. If nothing else, it keeps them at a distance after that. Or simply ask, "What the **** happened in your life that makes you such a total (descriptive word of your choice)?" Laughing and taking a picture "for FB" is another option. :D

Finally, some sun! Looks like it will be a beautiful day - wishing the same for all of you!

Mudpie
06-11-2013, 10:59 AM
{teeth sucking} Four lawns!!

OK, I'll see if I can fit you in as you did come recommended! :)

I actually felt it in my tummy. I think it's because my abs need more work and also because the grass was so out-of-control. May was very busy here, and it was warm and wet enough for everything to grow enthusiastically. Flowering was held back by the cold weather, though, and it's all happening at the same time. Quite lovely.

What does your new garden look like?

The back garden is amazing. The owner of the house included all the plants in a list of things that came with the house and the garden reflects her care and love of gardening. I am really aware that I am inheriting something that is very special to her and that she lavished a great deal of time on.

That said I am a rather slapdash gardener and I am away a lot on dog sits. So i will be looking at the budget to see if I can hire the people who fixed up my dad's garden to help me with this one. I will do what I can.

DH will do the physical mowing, as he does here. I think your virtual help will be a good motivator for him. ;)

Dagmar :flow1:

alinnell
06-11-2013, 11:28 AM
I remember summers in elementary school and junior high when I "got" to mow the lawn. Seriously, it was fun when I was younger. After a while it did become a chore. These days we have a gardener who does it for us.

The new building we bought sits on a corner and we have grass--a LOT of grass. One of our employees owed us some money for some glass he bought from us and then couldn't pay back so DH offered him a trade--mow the lawn for x number of weeks and we'll call it even. That was great, but now he's paid up so we had to hire a gardener for that. At one point, we got some bids to take out all the grass and put in some desert landscaping (cacti, small shrubs, rocks, etc.). I'd really LOVE that (and it would cut down on our water bill), but it is so expensive! I think the low bid was $35,000.00! Maybe if we win the lottery...

Becky, no way would I be able to do any of those three things to anyone verbally attacking me! In hindsight of a situation like Dagmar was in, I'd certainly THINK of those things but could never actually do it! DH was at a job site the other day when the homeowner accosted him. He actually threatened to have DH killed. DH carefully explained all that was going on with the construction so the homeowner understood and the guy left the conversation with a comment more in line with "I'll just have them break your legs." I think that if I were there, I would have said something to the tune of "I don't know how you do business where you're from (New York, BTW), but we do it different here in the desert" and walk away from the situation. I'm glad DH has a cool head about him!

ICUwishing
06-11-2013, 11:57 AM
Allison, it depends on the day and the reason. :) I really have had it with uncivilized, stupid blowhards who learned their manners from the internet and reality TV, but yes, one does have to do a personal risk assessment on the fly. Some of these morons might indeed be dangerous. This is where it comes in handy to be able to smile, and say "Two words. I carry."

bargoo
06-11-2013, 12:08 PM
I remember summers in elementary school and junior high when I "got" to mow the lawn. Seriously, it was fun when I was younger. After a while it did become a chore. These days we have a gardener who does it for us.

The new building we bought sits on a corner and we have grass--a LOT of grass. One of our employees owed us some money for some glass he bought from us and then couldn't pay back so DH offered him a trade--mow the lawn for x number of weeks and we'll call it even. That was great, but now he's paid up so we had to hire a gardener for that. At one point, we got some bids to take out all the grass and put in some desert landscaping (cacti, small shrubs, rocks, etc.). I'd really LOVE that (and it would cut down on our water bill), but it is so expensive! I think the low bid was $35,000.00! Maybe if we win the lottery...

Becky, no way would I be able to do any of those three things to anyone verbally attacking me! In hindsight of a situation like Dagmar was in, I'd certainly THINK of those things but could never actually do it! DH was at a job site the other day when the homeowner accosted him. He actually threatened to have DH killed. DH carefully explained all that was going on with the construction so the homeowner understood and the guy left the conversation with a comment more in line with "I'll just have them break your legs." I think that if I were there, I would have said something to the tune of "I don't know how you do business where you're from (New York, BTW), but we do it different here in the desert" and walk away from the situation. I'm glad DH has a cool head about him!

Allison, DH is a lot calmer than I would be. I do think this should be reported to the police, this guy sounds nuts enough to do some sort of damage, the police should have a report that he made threats,,,,twice.!!

traveling michele
06-11-2013, 12:16 PM
Someone tell me to walk away from the pastries.....
Multiple boxes of amazing looking bakery goodies have shown up in my break room. They are calling to me.... loudly.....

bargoo
06-11-2013, 12:34 PM
Someone tell me to walk away from the pastries.....
Multiple boxes of amazing looking bakery goodies have shown up in my break room. They are calling to me.... loudly.....

Oh! Do I hear you. I am embarrassed to tell this story on myself but in case it helps someone I will. This happened a number of years ago when I was on one of my many diets. Someone brought in a box of donuts to the break room.I sanctimoniously announced I am on a diet, I can't have one. The next morning I was the first one at work , went to the break room for coffee, a few remaining donuts were still there, donuts that have been left out all night are hard and unappealing. I ATE ONE !!!!!I knew right then that I had a problem with sugar, that I was most likely addicted to sugar.I knew there was something drastically wrong the way I was handling food issues. Sadly, it was a number of years before I actually did something about this. I do recognize that sugar has a strong appeal to me. Sugar is still a problem for me, show me an apple and a cookie and I will take the cookie every time.This is something I have to guard against all the time, sometimes I win, sometimes I fail but I am always aware of this.

traveling michele
06-11-2013, 12:42 PM
Thanks for sharing Bargoo. I had to go to the bathroom and walk by the treats. I didn't take one but I sure still have the urge. The scale wasn't kind to me this morning so I'd hate for it to be even worse tomorrow-- and I'd know why....

Shannon in ATL
06-11-2013, 12:47 PM
I'm having posting complications today. I think it is because I'm distracted.

I'm all up for virtual mowing and weeding. I have some weeding that needs to be done in my garden, too.

Birchie - it is amazing how much you feel after mowing tall grass. Seriously.

Allison - DH is very patient. Wow that would make me mad.

Michele - step away from the pastries.

Becky - I don't have a riding mower, so no mowing with a G&T for me, no matter how appealing it sounds. LOL

ICUwishing
06-11-2013, 12:49 PM
The germophobe in me does a great job with helping me imagine a bunch of scenarios where folks who have been to the bathroom (or wiping sniffles) without washing their hands have been carefully selecting their pastry by touching each one ... :barf:

bargoo
06-11-2013, 12:56 PM
The germophobe in me does a great job with helping me imagine a bunch of scenarios where folks who have been to the bathroom (or wiping sniffles) without washing their hands have been carefully selecting their pastry by touching each one ... :barf:

I see this in the grocery store where anyone can open the case including grubby little hands of children.

bargoo
06-11-2013, 01:02 PM
We sat out on the patio with scotch for a little bit last night trying to detox from the week, then get a call from DH's estranged father. Cancer. Lots of it. Probably not much time left. He wants DH to come up and bring DSS to visit. I'm trying not to be brutally angry on DH's behalf. This man ignored him for years - there are so many memories of DH waiting with his little suitcase by the door for the dad who never came to pick him up for whatever promised event. He finally had to let go and move on. They talk maybe once a year or so. Now dad calls and tells him about the cancer, asks him to come visit and says 'I might not have been father of the year, but you aren't a great son either'. I was so mad I almost fell out of my chair. DH took it pretty mellow and just said 'okay dad' and moved the conversation on. One more thing for this terrible month. Terrible year, it seems like.

I understand how you feel about this, Shannon but despite the cruel way DH was treated by his father, DH will never have regrets if he goes and sees his father now.

Shannon in ATL
06-11-2013, 01:20 PM
I understand how you feel about this, Shannon but despite the cruel way DH was treated by his father, DH will never have regrets if he goes and sees his father now.

Oh I know, and we will find a way to go. He lives several hours away from us, but we'll make it happen. It is the right thing to do. I'll have gotten past the mad by then I hope. :( I'm having a harder time with it than I should, I think I'm attaching everything else onto this thing and making it my rally cry in my head right now and that isn't fair, I know.

bargoo
06-11-2013, 01:30 PM
Oh I know, and we will find a way to go. He lives several hours away from us out of state, but we'll make it happen. It is the right thing to do. I'll have gotten past the mad by then I hope. :( I'm having a harder time with it than I should, I think I'm attaching everything else onto this thing and making it my rally cry right now and that isn't fair, I know.

Instead of being angry think how proud you will be of DH for being the bigger person and doing the right thing.

Shannon in ATL
06-11-2013, 02:18 PM
I like that Bargoo. Thanks. :)

alinnell
06-11-2013, 02:28 PM
The germophobe in me does a great job with helping me imagine a bunch of scenarios where folks who have been to the bathroom (or wiping sniffles) without washing their hands have been carefully selecting their pastry by touching each one ... :barf:

With this description, I imagine my DH. He has this HORRIBLE habit of wiping his nose with his finger/hand. He does it constantly. And even more when he seems to be a bit stressed. The absolute WORST is when we're standing and talking to a customer and he does it a dozen or so times and then shakes the guy's hand. Ewww. I've talked to him about it so often, too. He says his nose itches or whatever. For some reason he doesn't see it as something gross. Sometimes I think he has no idea that he's doing it. I kind of want to secretly video him doing it and then play it back later.

traveling michele
06-11-2013, 02:54 PM
With this description, I imagine my DH. He has this HORRIBLE habit of wiping his nose with his finger/hand. He does it constantly. And even more when he seems to be a bit stressed. The absolute WORST is when we're standing and talking to a customer and he does it a dozen or so times and then shakes the guy's hand. Ewww. I've talked to him about it so often, too. He says his nose itches or whatever. For some reason he doesn't see it as something gross. Sometimes I think he has no idea that he's doing it. I kind of want to secretly video him doing it and then play it back later.

They no longer look appealing to me! :o
They are somewhat picked over and I can imagine many hands have touched them.

I'm so sorry Shannon about dh and his father. He hopefully (your dh) can have some closure after his father dies. I had to care for both of my parents when they were dying. They were both horrible people to me most of my life. It was hard to do but I have peace knowing that I cared for them even if they didn't do the same for me.

I'm facing so many challenges food wise the next couple of weeks! So hard... dh came back last night from China. He loves to cook and I love his food. My childhood friend (from 3rd grade!) is here on business for two weeks. She assumed my dh would be out of town and suggested that she is available every evening. Well...no... dh happens to be in town. We are getting together for sushi tomorrow (after I do bikram!) and we'll see when else we get together. Thursday is my work party (tons of food of course) from 2-5-- not sure how/when I'll exercise. Next week I have a librarian party with food again and again with the times that makes it hard to exercise but I shouldn't miss either. Gotta stay strong and ignore my grumbly tummy!

When I'm having trouble staying focused (or the scale is being stupid) I try to remember some NSV's (non scale victories). I had a few recently in Houston. When looking at apartments with dd, two of the people showing us apartments thought we were friends, not mom and dd-- my dd thought it was amusing-- like her friend would pay her deposit?? Then at the airport, an employee asked dd if she needed help and she said-- no-- my mom is asking for help-- the employee saw me and went on and on-- no way that is your mom! You're kidding?! Really?! Almost embarrassing! Finally, yesterday at body pump, a new woman was asking me about the class. She couldn't believe how much weight I had on my bar. I don't really lift that much but compared to someone new, I guess I do. So, I need to remember those.

What NSV's have any of you had lately?:carrot:

silverbirch
06-11-2013, 03:23 PM
I'm glad you brought up NSVs, Michele. I've been thinking that I missed the term and that it could be useful.

I can go up stairs at work two at a time again. I wasn't able to for ages because my lower back wasn't working properly. And now I can. I can also (usually) jump down uneven steps in a particular piece of woodland and feel confident in the strength of my left leg.

You know, writing that makes me realise how this "injury" has affected the amount of exercise I've been taking over the past few years. And consequently my weight. Thankfully, I seem to have found someone who is helping me. He's a very knowledgeable personal trainer. I used to see him once a week and now it's every six weeks or so. It's a long haul.

Shannon in ATL
06-11-2013, 03:25 PM
I'm struggling for an NSV right now.

PC and I threw a great baby shower on Saturday, and everyone had lots of compliments about the food and entertainment. Does that count?

alinnell
06-11-2013, 03:31 PM
Yes, Shannon, that does count--especially after your stressful week AND the number of people that went to that shower!

I, too, struggle to find an NSV. I suppose mine is clothing related. Yes, the size 8 Not Your Daughter's Jeans shorts that I ordered fit to the point of being slightly large (they do tend to shrink with washing over time, so it'll be fine). Also the JJill order I got yesterday fit for the tops, but I have to send back the bottoms--I ordered large, you know, just in case. Huge is an overstatement! I will trade for medium, but frankly, I almost went for small because of how huge the larges were. On the other hand, I wear size 9 shoes and ordered two pair of sandals in 10 and one was too small. So I don't get that at all.

CherryPie99
06-11-2013, 03:43 PM
You bet your booty that counts, Shannon!!!

My NSV for today is despite my HATRED of the cold, I went out on my lunch hour in a cold rain and ran 7 miles, came back and ate a healthy low cal wrap with a side of carrots, celery and grape tomatoes! Even though I looked like this when I came back to work I don't regret it!

http://i41.tinypic.com/1zwtqf.jpg

Sizing is just CRAZY, isn't it Allison? That's why I don't like ordering online unless they have easy returns to a local store. Even within the same store you can find wildly different sizing!

Jen

silverbirch
06-11-2013, 05:28 PM
Yes, I certainly think so!

(One day you'll have to tell me what a baby shower is, why, how long they've been taking place and all those anthropological details I love to hear. I think you know that being able to learn more about other culture was a stimulus to me joining 3FC.)

alinnell
06-11-2013, 05:51 PM
Yes, I certainly think so!

(One day you'll have to tell me what a baby shower is, why, how long they've been taking place and all those anthropological details I love to hear. I think you know that being able to learn more about other culture was a stimulus to me joining 3FC.)

A baby shower is a party given to an expectant mother. You give her gifts for the child (clothes, diapers, other equipment). It's similar to a bridal shower where you give gifts to the bride.

silverbirch
06-11-2013, 06:08 PM
Thanks, Allison. The two types of shower both seem very woman-focused. Is it only women and children who attend?

Here we tend to give presents after the baby is (safely) born. We don't have bridal showers either: presents are given to both the bride and groom at the wedding (same idea - just about the time the deed is safely done). And the presents generally aren't opened in front of the person who brought them (though this varies a bit).

NSV - I can feel my abs very strongly when I pull them in.

alinnell
06-11-2013, 06:42 PM
Yes, Birchie, showers do tend to be more woman focused. Sometimes children attend. But these days it isn't unusual for the men to attend as well. In fact, when my DH and I were married, my best friend (maid of honor) threw us a couples shower and the gifts were to be for couples rather than just the bride. It was cute--she assigned everyone that attended a certain time of day. So for example 7 AM could be an alarm clock, coffee maker, coffee cups, etc. And those that got the evening hours could be a bit more risque with lingerie or whatnot.

silverbirch
06-11-2013, 06:47 PM
Fascinating. Thanks.

Time to turn out the light now. Night, all!

saef
06-11-2013, 10:28 PM
Jen, you are tanned and tiny. And you look like a teenager with your hair lashed back. I mean, I've seen your height & weight many a time on your posts, but this picture suddenly gave me a sense of scale. So I'm looking at that picture and thinking, "This woman feels large weighing in at about 122?" "Large" is not a word that comes to mind. "Lean," the word that threw you into a tailspin the other day, does indeed seem appropriate to me.

silverbirch
06-12-2013, 07:30 AM
saef , I've just read in the Guardian about Bloomberg's flood defence proposals, including grants to property owners to floodproof their buildings. Is this likely to help your case? I'd like to think it would help but I know politics can be murky.

CherryPie99
06-12-2013, 10:35 AM
Jen, you are tanned and tiny. And you look like a teenager with your hair lashed back. I mean, I've seen your height & weight many a time on your posts, but this picture suddenly gave me a sense of scale. So I'm looking at that picture and thinking, "This woman feels large weighing in at about 122?" "Large" is not a word that comes to mind. "Lean," the word that threw you into a tailspin the other day, does indeed seem appropriate to me.

Geez Saef, you flatter me way too much! :D I just don't see it. It's not that I feel "large" at 122, I just feel "not small" if that makes any sense.

I don't think I shared this with you guys but this weekend I was in Lowe's to pick up a couple things - after working in my gardens all day and looking pretty horrible - and some woman recognized me from my blog! It was so weird and surreal!

She came up to talk to me and asked if I was the woman who maintains the weight loss and fitness blog and said that she was so excited to see me in real life.

But that was her comment - that I am "tiny" and that this surprised her.

Having a "Murphy's Law" kind of morning here and some jerk brought in donuts that are calling me! Send some anti-donut vibes my way, PLEASE!

Jen

bargoo
06-12-2013, 10:40 AM
Jen, did you see my donut story that I posted yesterday ? It was something of an epiphany for me.

traveling michele
06-12-2013, 11:20 AM
That's a major NSV Jen!!
Step away from the donuts-- I did yesterday and I survived.

Another NSV for me last night at bikram yoga. My dd went three days in a row with me and then not last night (she's back at school)-- so several people asked me about her-- one asked if she was my daughter-- but a young girl asked if she was my sister! She and I started talking-- she had been very sweet to dd when she was there-- encouraging her-- this young girl told me how impressed she was with dd-- that bikram is a real struggle for her (she looks amazing btw)-- she said she is 23 and just finishing school, has a three year old and is getting married next week. She was impressed that my dd was 22 and finishing school with a job. I need to share with dd-- you never know how people may touch your life.

WardHog
06-12-2013, 12:22 PM
Jen, your stomach will hurt all day if you eat a donut. It will lie there like a brick for hours.

Michele, I am glad you and your dd had such a nice time together.

A friend from my gym asked me if we could work out together today. We did some of the stuff I would normally do on my own and she said she felt like she does when she works with a trainer and that she might throw up. She is 15 years younger than me, btw. :)

krampus
06-12-2013, 01:25 PM
Jen,

I always say "yes" to sweet treats, but donuts don't make the cut. To use drug metaphors, when I eat a donut it brings all the "compulsive redose" and none of the "euphoria" that other, better sweet treats provide.

You look great! I'm envious, you're way leaner than I am and we weigh the same ish :P

Shannon in ATL
06-12-2013, 02:03 PM
Jen - you look great! Woo! You do look tiny. :) Avoid the donut - not worth it.

Ward - I love that the younger friend felt beaten down by your workout. Just LOVE it.

Birchie - what Allison said about baby showers is spot on. Historically they have been just for the women folk, as have been bridal showers, usually 10-15 people I believe. An expectant mother would have several showers often - one from family, maybe two if both sides, one from friends, sometimes one from coworkers. In recent years it has become a trend to throw father's showers - friends or coworkers often do those. It is also more and more common to do couple's showers, both for weddings and for baby showers. This event Photochik and I put on was a couple's baby shower, the only one thrown by friends. The mother to be changed jobs the week she found out she was pregnant, so her new coworkers didn't have her a shower (small library, not much staff.) The father to be's mother threw a family shower a few weeks ago, but father and stepmother didn't attend that one. As a result of all of those things we ended up with 65 people invited, 35 RSVPd saying they were coming. A number of the invites were from out of state, so I didn't expect them. 7 said they were coming and didn't show. This is an unusually large baby shower, though the trend for couple's showers is often resulting in larger and larger events. More food provided by the person hosting, though not more gifts for the parents as a couple brings one extra person but the same present. I honestly feel like they have become overdone and insane - I attended one a few weeks ago with 40ish people that looked like she had professionally catered it that cost her over $1000. Mine was not so fancy - plastic tableclothes, made all the food - and between DH, myself and PC we still spent close to $700 once it was all said and done. I read an article just yesterday about the archaic tradition of a wedding shower and how as people get married older and have established households it is no longer necessary to give them loads of presents to set up a household. Not sure if that is true with baby showers, as most people are totally unprepared over here for first baby. For second baby I think a big shower isn't appropriate, but small gathering with friends is okay. Just no cribs on the registry the second time around.

Long answer about baby showers. LOL

I'm going down to my hometown for my grandfather's surgery tomorrow, I'm trying not to be anxious but the way the month is going I'm nervous. One piece of good news - my brother's little daschund had some masses removed yesterday that we were sure were cancer but they are all just hard, fatty tissue. It was a good day for pups yesterday.

silverbirch
06-12-2013, 03:17 PM
Thank you, Shannon. It's another world over where you live. (Yes, I live a sheltered life. :) ) I'm glad it all went so well. Good luck on your travels.

Jen, yes, you look great!

CherryPie99
06-12-2013, 09:23 PM
You guys are way to nice to me - I posted that picture to show what a complete DORK I am!!

At any rate, I am glad to report that NO DONUTS WERE CONSUMED by this chick today!

Bargoo - I did read your story. It's very interesting to me - when I was fat, sweets weren't my thing at all. I almost NEVER ate candy bars, I'm not into milk chocolate, and most of the time I could take it or leave it if donuts or other sweets were around. My weakness was always things like breads - I could stuff an entire loaf of fresh baked italian bread slathered with butter down my throat.

Now I find myself really craving sweets a lot. I miss white bread but I don't CRAVE it like I do sweet stuff....

Jen

Mudpie
06-13-2013, 07:24 AM
Jen re craving sweets - When I stopped drinking alcohol (and in later years diet soda) I found myself craving sweets. There is a whole physiological/psychological thing about replacing things people's bodies are used or are addicted to - I'm sure you know more about this than I do, given what you do for a living. Withdrawing from most substances causes stress to the body.

In my totally unscientific opinion body weight maintenance is stressful. Our bodies tend to want carbs for quick energy when we're stressed. Sweets tend to deliver "instant" energy so when we're stressed we may crave them.

Dagmar :dizzy:

CherryPie99
06-13-2013, 09:55 AM
I guess I always knew this intellectually, but since I've embarked on this journey of losing weight, I have been amazed and fascinated about how much the process of losing a great amount of weight has with getting clean and sober!

I've probably mentioned this before and if so I apologize, but I've even had "drug dreams" about food. My clients have always talked about their drunk or drug dreams, where they were using in a dream and it felt SO REAL.

A couple of month ago I had a dream that I was at a party and was alone in the room with a sheet cake. I started picking at the cake and the next thing you know I was just STUFFING cake in my face - using my hands - no utensils. I remember in the dream thinking that I hoped that no one came in the room, because I had cake SMEARED across my face. I would be humiliated, but I could not stop.

I woke up with a start and had to pee. I went to the bathroom and sat down still half asleep and started looking at my hands. I then realized I expected to see cake under my nails! I then felt a surge of relief realizing it was just a dream....

Jen

bargoo
06-13-2013, 10:17 AM
Jen, it was only a dream but it also reinforced my donut story and it could be anything in my case it happened to be donuts. It was the sneakiness, the false front I put on to coworkers, I can't eat a donut because I am on a diet and then eating it when it was old and stale and when nobody could see me.

saef
06-13-2013, 10:51 AM
I'm honestly not sure if carbs call me because of their nature or because I've labeled them "forbidden" and my mind would be drawn to anything so labeled.

I'm prone to fixations or obsessions with certain foods. Some foods seem to imprint themselves on me, when I eat them & the experience is so good, it trips some wires in my brain and I become greedy and consumed with desire to repeat the experience. Because if a taste of something is good, being totally satiated with an unlimited quantity has to be better, right? Because more is always better, right? Somehow this triggers scarcity thinking: What if I don't get enough? What if I'm cut off by running out or finishing the thing?

Sometimes fixations end. You know I can practically chart my life by what I liked to eat. There was the breakup with the first college boyfriend, where I could easily finish a 1-lb bag of peanut M&Ms. There was the fall when my Grandmother died, and I loved those Brach's caramels with the various flavored centers. There was the summer of the premade Rice Krispies treats. And the summer when I couldn't get enough of those cheap tricolor wafer cookies in vanilla, faux strawberry and chocolate. There was the passing obsession with sweetened condensed milk, which I could eat by the spoonful from the can. There was the bran muffin fixation but they had to come from a bakery called On the Rise in downtown Syracuse. The fixation with Medjhul dates. The insatiable hunger for pecan pralines.

Each obsession ended, but I still fear having them triggered again, because I have gone back to foods in the past, trying to re-experience whatever oblivion or comfort I once derived from them at some other period in my past.

As I go through this list, it's reminding me of peoples' lists of ex-boyfriends & crushes. Sad to think food has been this important in my life.

JayEll
06-13-2013, 11:45 AM
Popping in to tell you all a story about food.

When my partner was undergoing radiation therapy, all bets were off about food. I had to take care of her needs, mine, and the cat's. I am not someone who cooks a lot, and I faced a big challenge with how to keep us fed.

Some of you may remember that I've had a "thing" for Doritos. Well, in this time of unbelievable stress, I bought Doritos. And I ate them, sometimes twice a day, sometimes double servings. Anytime I wanted them, I ate them.

One of the foods my partner could eat, for awhile at least, was ice cream. Full fat ice cream. So I was always buying small containers of Haagen Daaz.

Two things have happened since then. One is that I no longer care about Doritos. I don't buy them--I don't want them particularly. The other is that ice cream can now sit in my freezer for weeks without me having to eat it.

Make what you will of it.

Jay

iriswhispers
06-13-2013, 02:04 PM
Hello maintainers!! I haven't posted in ages but I see lots of familiar "faces" and I hope everyone is doing well :)

I just finished my first year of med school which was INTENSE. I'm sure I should have expected that, but I don't think anything really could have prepared me. I ended up losing a few more lbs in the process, but probably not in the most healthy way possible. I tell people I've spent the past year on the "coffee and crap" diet and it's largely been the case. I'm off for a little over a month, and I definitely want to take some time to prep some healthy freezer meals for myself! I'm sad to admit that a decent span of time went by where the only veggies I consumed were the (mostly iceburg) salads from the cafeteria.

Jen, I have had a fair number of what I call "binge dreams" where I'm just eating and eating. I wake up feeling guilty and disgusting - but then realize it didn't really happen. I don't know your past, but I've had problems with binge eating and while I've largely overcome that in waking life, the dreams still follow me.

Speaking of showers, I have a bridal shower to go to next weekend for a family friend. It seems like a bit of overkill - they also had an engagement party and of course there will be the wedding - so basically I'll end up getting her three gifts and she and her fiancee have already been living together, so I know they have tons of housewares... I don't mean to be a scrooge, but jeez!

alinnell
06-13-2013, 03:51 PM
Good to hear from you Iris (even though I see your Facebook posts from time to time!). Coffee and crap, huh? I wonder if it'd work for me!

bargoo
06-13-2013, 07:16 PM
Iris, welcome back .

Mudpie
06-14-2013, 06:33 AM
:wave: Iris. Congrats on getting through the first year of med school!

If I'm not being too nosy how long is your program and what's involved ie internship etc.? My cousin went through med school about a million years ago and I'm wondering how much things have changed.

The "coffee and crap" diet is the same as when he went through :lol:

Dagmar :cool:

silverbirch
06-14-2013, 06:36 AM
The "coffee and crap" diet is the same as when he went through :lol:



How did that work out for him? Has he changed his approach at all? :smug:

Mudpie
06-14-2013, 06:44 AM
One of the other dogwalkers has 2 Rottweilers - unneutered and unspayed. Her female was impregnated accidentally by her male and now there are 5 puppies. I went to see them last night. She has 3 other dogs in the household and was boarding a 4th. I can't imagine doing that.

I am looking forward to having ONE dog again. But that comes with sadness as the cats will have ended their long lives. I may get another tortie as well as the dog, now that I'm going to have a house.

Speaking of the house DH and I are doing a lot of arguing :rollpin: about the the renos. On the one hand DH keeps talking about cheaper alternatives, like sanding down the parquet floors instead of replacing them with hardwood. Then he turns around and says I should also replace all the baseboards, casings, and doors. :dunno:

He's also being a stickler for safety features and now is insisting that the whole deck has to have railings. The insurance company asked for ONE railing on the steps. And on it goes.

I have been eating in the evening just to stay awake up to 9 p.m. I'm finding I wake up @ 2 a.m. in a panic and then can't get back to sleep. :tired: :faint:

I decided to go back to the doctor's about the lump in my armpit. It still hurts a bit and it's not the first time I've had this happen. I'm pretty sure it's a cyst that's being aggravated by all the stress.

This will all end when the renos end, I hope. Although I know DH will fight me about anything I buy for the house. SIGH.

Here I thought owning a house would be fun. Kinda like camping I guess. :p

Dagmar :stress:

alinnell
06-14-2013, 01:02 PM
Oh, you guys! My daughter just sent me this:

photo (http://smg.photobucket.com/user/QuackDcky3/media/cuteanimals_zpsa0b83955.jpg.html)

bargoo
06-14-2013, 01:06 PM
Oh, you guys! My daughter just sent me this:

photo (http://smg.photobucket.com/user/QuackDcky3/media/cuteanimals_zpsa0b83955.jpg.html)
What a beautiful bride she will be ! lCongratulations to the happy couple.

Shannon in ATL
06-14-2013, 01:18 PM
Congratulations to DD, Allison!

traveling michele
06-14-2013, 01:43 PM
Allison,
I can't see the photo at work but I'm guessing dd got engaged?!?
Congratulations!!

BillBlueEyes
06-14-2013, 02:05 PM
Congratulations, Allison, future MIL.

silverbirch
06-14-2013, 03:07 PM
Congrats all round. They look a very happy pair.

iriswhispers
06-14-2013, 03:53 PM
Allison, congrats to your DD!! Great pics!

Dagmar, my dad has a rottie and he is staunchly against neutering. The dog is pretty much never out of eyesight, but I still don't like the idea... and he's a handful for anyone other than my dad. But try talking sense into him - I definitely see where I got my stubbornness from! As far as school, I have 4 years of actual med school, two of which are classroom based and two of which will be on rotation (hands on). Then I'll do residency which means I'll have the degree and be a doc, but it's kind of like an apprenticeship - I'll still be working under someone else. The length of that varies based on degree of specialization.

On the coffee and crap diet... haha. I don't actually recommend it! I'm sure I won't give up the coffee but I'm making an effort to change the "crap" part.

krampus
06-14-2013, 04:20 PM
Congrats to DD allison!

WardHog
06-14-2013, 06:51 PM
Aw, so sweet! Congratulations to your daughter, Allison!

WardHog
06-14-2013, 06:54 PM
Oh, and speaking of dreams, I have those binge dreams, too. But today I was napping and dreamed that I passed out during spin class and I was on the floor while the instructor was trying to talk to me to see if I was ok. I could hear her but couldn't talk. ugh.

Mudpie
06-14-2013, 08:02 PM
How did that work out for him? Has he changed his approach at all? :smug:

Didn't have to - he got married and his wife fed him very well from his mid 30's on. He's closing in on 60 now (years old that is) and he's remarkably fit, given that his wife is from Italy and loves to cook amazing food. I guess 100+ K of cycling every week and swimming all summer keep him trim.

Dagmar :D

Mudpie
06-14-2013, 08:04 PM
Oh, you guys! My daughter just sent me this:

photo (http://smg.photobucket.com/user/QuackDcky3/media/cuteanimals_zpsa0b83955.jpg.html)

How lovely Allison. Congratulations to Dana and her beau.

Now you can start dieting in anticipation of the wedding and being the mother of the bride (running from the room as you throw rotten tomatoes at me :p)

Dagmar :dizzy:

traveling michele
06-17-2013, 12:49 AM
Finally saw the pics Allison! They look so happy!

ICUwishing
06-17-2013, 09:48 AM
Congratulations, Allison!