I think I need to raise my hand and admit I'm a comfort eater
So this is really weird for me, because I've never experienced this in my life, but I've had some huge life changes since September and I think I've become a comfort eater...potentially a binge eater.
I moved to Japan in September, before I was really active on 3FC (hello to everyone who remembers me!) and I was losing weight slowly but surely. I lost 50 lbs before I left for Japan and I was really set on continuing my success here.
But I haven't.
I don't know how else to eloquently put it. I got here and I felt like I've had to force so much effort to losing weight. I joined a gym and I try to go 3 times a week and I have been successful, I frequent the Zumba class which I love, but I now realise that I have developed a bad relationship with food.
I think I realised I had a comfort eating problem when I was at work the other day. I was really moody, I was generally just having a stressful day and then I thought to myself that I would get a ready made spaghetti bolognese from the local convenience shop, some Coke and some chips and eat it all and the thought of that made me really happy. That's the first time I think I've associated food with stress relief.
I also think I have a problem with binge eating. I don't feel hungry, but I just eat anyway. This is disgusting to me, but I have to admit it or this thread is pointless, but I just got a goody bag from work (left over party food) and I ate 4 bags of chips (40g bags), a bag of rice crackers, 2 small chocolates, 2 small bags of Haribo and about 4 mini cookies. This is the first time I've eaten that much food in one sitting for the past year and a half. I didn't even stop to think, I just kept eating.
So I felt like I needed to make a thread and get it out in the open. I never truly struggled with such eating problems before, but now I feel like I'm just eating for the sake of eating and also eating when I feel stressed out.
For people who have similar problems, how do you cope? How to you stay accountable? What techniques do you use to stop yourself going crazy? What goes through your head when you say "no" to treats offered to you by others?
I know exactly how you feel. I have always been a comfort eater even though I went through a good 5 years being really slim but just not appreciating it. When i had my first child i gained alot of weight from comfort eating, then she was very unwell and was in and out of hospital alot so i kept on eating to feel better.
Its only now about 5 years later when its all sort of clicked and i know full well i eat emotionally. I discovered OA and went to a few online meetings where i discovered abstinence. I just thought no way theres no way i could do it. No junk food? I have such a sweet tooth theres no way i could do it. But slowly as the months went on and i was exercising but still eating junk i realised i had to do something. Even though i was being strict and only letting myself eat junk at the weekend, it never lasted. I knew i had the problem once i started i couldnt stop so i decided it was all or nothing.
So since September i took on abstinence and have had alternatives whenever i want junk. Its hard of course especially at the beginning but i keep telling myself when i want junk that the only reason i want it is to make myself feel emotionally better and in fact it does the complete opposite. That is what will make me feel down and depressed. It doesnt make anything better only worse. I tell myself over and over and find a cereal bar or soya yogurt or flavoured rice cakes and have that instead.
I know how hard it is, I have literally had to fight off food and watch all these skinny people eat whatever they want no problem. But i feel when you can yourself mentally on the right track. Tell yourself this is what im doing, this is how its going to be then hopefully everything else will follow. Hope this has been off help
i don't think you have a binge eating problem honey... if you did, you would've eaten way more than that. sounds more like boredom-eating to me, which i something i also struggle with. you ate cuz the food was there, and cuz you didn't have much else to do.
this is something that happens a lot to me. i dunno if it's the same for you but, you work all day, you come home from work, then you're alone at home for several hours, with not much to entertain you cuz you can't watch tv, everything around you is foreign, and unless you've got a planned outing, people live just so far from each other that you can't just ring a friend to hang out, and there is only so long the internet can keep you entertained. it's boring. however, bring food into the picture and then every other activity is fun! watch a movie? sure! read a book? sure! with a snack i'm not really thinking about it...
plus there's the fact that convenience stores are so d*mn well... convenient. i seriously think i may not have gained that much weight my first year here had there not been a combini RIGHT across the street from my house.
it's also difficult dieting here (besides the fact that there is no diet food available ANYWHERE) because Japan is really a food-and-drinks oriented society. all major events here are centered around eating and drinking, and contrary to popular belief, japanese food is soooo unhealthy!! it is only their super-human metabolisms that keeps them so skinny!!! (god, i hate them all... ) so about the food that you get at work, just don't bring it home. keep it in your drawer at work, and then when you feel hungry mid-morning one day, you can have one or three crackers. i find it much easier to be good during the day while i'm at work, then if i'm alone at home and tired in the evening.
another obvious tip would be to avoid combinis like the plague. yes, everything in them is so awesome and delicious and already made... but remember that those bentos all pack a crazy amount of calories that really aren't worth it. just keep your fridge stuffed with fresh food and then if you have a craving you can eat something healthy instead of going to the combini.
First of all, I'm so glad to see you back around here. You are a treasured member here and you were missed!!
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Originally Posted by KawaiiCandie
i don't think you have a binge eating problem honey... if you did, you would've eaten way more than that. sounds more like boredom-eating to me, which i something i also struggle with. you ate cuz the food was there, and cuz you didn't have much else to do.
I have to agree. I don't think it's necessarily binge-eating, but boredom eating! I suffered from the same thing and even now, a year of maintenance under my belt, I still struggle with boredom eating.
It's tough. I don't really have words of wisdom other than sticking to a set calorie limit. It's really the only thing that's worked for me because if I am really having a hard time I can still "feed" that boredom eating urge with something as long as I account for it. I think it's the only thing keeping me sane and on track!
If I can't eat, I boredom drink instead. It's one of the reasons I never had to worry about my water intake!! Not that I'm bored all the time, but when I want SOMETHING, I reach for water, tea, diet soda, etc. rather than food if I can help it.
I guess it's not really the best example, because I haven't "cured" it...I just deal with it in my own way. I sort of view this whole weight loss and maintenance thing the same way though. I don't consider myself "cured" of my obesity—it's just in remission. I need to do my own "treatment" in order to ensure it never comes back.
Do you think these new issues might be a product of dieting for a long time? I developed a several months-long binge eating problem when I was in Japan trying to eat nothing but vegetables and worrying constantly about getting back to my lowest weight - I am pretty sure now that it was a byproduct of being in "diet mode" and feeling frustrated and deprived.
I think it's dangerous to attempt to put a quantity of food to a 'binge'.
A binge is generally considered anytime someone feels out of control when they are eating. Someone might feel like they binged on a packet of Ramen noodles or 2 extra cookies, simply because they did not WANT to eat those things but they felt out of control to stop it. Sure, for a lot of binge eaters our binges are large, but yesterday I binged on two cookies, a few scoops of cookie dough, a packet of ramen and a handful of marshmallows. Maybe not that bad, but this was in addition to dinner and I felt out of control. I wanted to stop, but felt I couldn't. This is what most would call a 'binge'.
Binge eating is a pretty serious thing, but I think you need to ask yourself how you were feeling when you ate all that food? Were you bored? Tired? Sad? Did you tell yourself you weren't going to eat all that food but ended up breaking down and doing it anyways?
If it starts to become and uncontrollable frequent occurence then it might be the beginnings of a binge eating disorder. I have struggled with it for a long time and so I don't remember the events that ultimately led up to it. It could be rather insidious in it's onset, so pay careful attention to your body for the next while.
I have been thinking about the concept of comfort eating or "eating feelings". I had always heard about it, but never thought twice. Then I read something somewhere, and I was like, "Whoa. Am I eating my feelings? Ew. Stop it." I had no idea I fit in that box. Figuring out ways to feel good with out eating a container of cream cheese and some buttery crackers is HARD! I try to trick myself into not doing that, but it still ends up just being a battle in my brain until I fall asleep.
Come sit by me. I'm a definite comfort eater, and I take it way too far. (Like as in "my boyfriend made me cry. When he leaves for his night shift I'm going to order a family size lasagne and eat it"). I'm also a very bad boredom eater.
I found once I got the mechanics of dieting down, I was able to step back and examine my motivations. I used food as a reward constantly and it took a lot of reprogramming to a)reward myself in a different way when I'd genuinely earned it, and b)learn that I don't need a freaking reward every time I do the dishes or get up on time. I'm an adult human, not a puppy being potty trained.
Wow thank you all so much for your words of encouragement and advice. I have definitely taken it on board and I too will agree with people when they say that I'm no doubt suffering from boredom eating! It makes sense really, since my Dad also suffers from this bad habit.
deb - Thank you for sharing your story and you're an inspiration to have gone cold turkey on junk food! I salute your efforts. You're right, it's all about keeping things in perspective and realising why I'm trying hard.
Kawaii - You pretty much nailed what I'm going through on the head! I am incredibly bored when I get home from work sometimes. I just sit here and go on the internet then go to bed. I need to start doing more with my time alone like I used to. Gah, you're so right about convenience stores, I have one literally around the corner and it's so easy to buy something there rather than cook. =( You're right though, stock up my apartment with good food and if I end up eating it then it's not going to do as much damage as junk food! Thanks for your response, even just reading that you've been through the same has helped me and been a comfort.
Mozzy - You're right! Here's to tomorrow!
sontaikle - Aww, thank you! *hug* Thank you for your input, and huge congratulations on keeping it under wraps for a year +! Boredom drinking might have to be something I try!
krampus - Well I've never gone on a proper diet before. I just made healthy substitutions to what I was initially eating. Now there's so much junk food at work to eat and all the convenience stores make it easy to not cook healthy and go for quick and easy options!
thewalrus - Well the the other night when I ate all the junk food...I don't know I just couldn't stop myself. I knew what I was doing was wrong, I didn't even feel hungry, I just kept on going. I suppose I was kind of bored, but not horrifically so, just lazying about honestly. Thank you for your advice, I'm going to do my best to listen to my mind and my body next time so it doesn't get out of control.
smashlers - I felt the same way, I never saw myself as comfort eating, but it was when I thought about pigging out and it made me feel REALLY happy that I started to think "hang on, do I have a problem here?!" I'd rather feel that happy about the thought of exercising than eating junk!
Radiojane - I'm glad that you've found a mentality that works for you, and you're right in keeping in mind the motivations behind healthy eating at the forefront of your mind all the time. I need to stop rewarding hard work with food, because it's not rewarding my body in any way it's hurting it.
eheh, glad i could help... seriously though, i struggled with this for SO long. there was a time, back when i still lived in Hama, when i used to go to bed at 9pm at night, just because i was so bored and i had already spent hours watching tv and surfing the net, and to stop myself from eating :/
your only options are to either find something to do, or to find ways to curb your boredom eating! like someone else mentioned, i tried to boredom drink. pepsi nex is like my best friend. lol. i know i know... aspartame yaddiyaddiyadda... but i really don't care. i also drink way more tea than i ever did in my life... whatever works for you!
Rie (Hey, I remember you..I've been inactive recently just like you) I have this same pattern developing I've put on at least 16 pounds since moving back to LA and it SUCKS. I need to fix it up. damn it.
I think I need to raise my hand and admit I'm a comfort eater
) so about the food that you get at work, just don't bring it home. keep it in your drawer at work, and then when you feel hungry mid-morning one day, you can have one or three crackers. i find it much easier to be good during the day while i'm at work, then if i'm alone at home and tired in the evening.
You are a treasured member here and you were missed!!
I've put on at least 16 pounds since moving back to LA and it SUCKS. I need to fix it up. damn it.
