[lauralyn]

I have three children. My oldest daughter just turned 20 on the 15th. My other daughter is 15 and my son is 11 and I think I want another baby.

I am not sure if I feel this way because I have turned 40 and my clock is ticking loudly but I have always wanted another baby off and on since my son was born.

I am so torn because I just know my body and I know that if I did have another baby I would gain at least 50 lbs...I get ravenous when I am pregnant.

My husband likes how things are now that the kids are older and keeps telling me that I am too old and how hard the pregnancies were on me. I hate hearing that, I think about it at times but then I hear of others having their first child in their late 30's or early 40's. If I don't do this soon I won't be able to and will I have lots of regrets down the road if I don't?

Others tell me that I should just wait for grandchildren, that it is just as good if not better than having your own. I am not one of these women who are living for the day their child has a baby. I want my own baby, one I don't have to give back at the end of the day.

My husband says I get this way whenever I see a baby and I admit that I do and we have had 3 babies in the past couple of years born into the family but I think about it all the time.

Have any of you had this happen and what did you do? I just don't want to turn 50 and think of what I missed out on.

[BellaLucia]

I must ask this in all seriousness, were you on a sugar binge last night like me, lol. My friend Debbie had to calm me down because I was all over the map with ideas after binging hard core, not saying you and I are like twins, but ya know?

[lauralyn]

I wish I could say that is the reason but no, this is how I am all the time lol

[nationalparker]

Do you have any interest in being a foster family to an infant/child in need?

[lauralyn]

I actually do, my husband and I have considered taking in older children...say 10 + but that urge to have a baby is just always there in the back of my mind.

[tonkry]

Just wondering how your health is? That truly should be a determining factor for having a baby at 40.
I had so many problems with my second pregnancy due to health issues that I can no longer have children as my heart cannot take the strain of it. But then again, I know a woman who had a baby at 50 and did great.

So how is your health?

[lauralyn]

My health is great, I think the only thing I would really worry about is increased risk of birth defects and weight gain.

[tonkry]

I understand completely! It is good that you are looking at everything. I wish you the best with your decision.

[joyfulloser]

The miracle of life is such a blessing, it's no wonder why you think about pro-creating again. That said, with our current economic state, it may be wise to weigh all the pros and cons before seriously considering the idea. It IS a two party decision, so I'd also give weight to my husband's feelings on the issue.

...I am not one of these women who are living for the day their child has a baby. I want my own baby, one I don't have to give back at the end of the day.

THIS ^^^ made me LOL! I can tell you from experience, sometimes you won't have to "wait" as long as you think Our kids can and will do as THEY please and make us grandparents before WE are even ready to become one!!! (43 and grandma of 2...and yes, I love my beautiful grands to death...but I don't mind giving them back)

Perhaps the "timeclock" ticking in your head is making you anxious. Anxiety is very prevalent amongst many of us today...let's face it...we live in very "tryin" times. So, keep that in mind, this is NOT the same society as when you were raising your older children...times are much harder now...so your experience will be much different.

In any event, I hope all the best for you and your family...just wanted to give you a few things to consider!

[3forus]

I had the same feelings for a few yrs. I worked as a nurse in hospice, I gained so much weight from stress eating and binging just to feel better when a patient died. I finaly worked my way though it and decided to give up nursing and open a day care. It has worked for me. I get my baby fix and get to help nurture a new life, without the strings attached. Hope you find your way though this.
Nancy