[nance11]

I am new here and so glad I registered as I have felt so alone with so many issues and feelings until reading some of what people have shared. I have been hating my "skin situation" for several years now and am scared to death of choosing the "wrong" surgeon and getting a bad result, particularly on my arms. I am interested in an arm lift as well as a tummy tuck and/or lower body lift and breast lift (if I can figure out how to finance and get time off). Does anyone have any recommendations for a surgeon in the RI area? This is destroying the relationship with a wonderful man I have been seeing for the last year and a half. I recently regained 25lbs of the weight I had previously lost (after major spine surgery) and, with that and lost muscle mass, everything just looks worse than before my back surgery last year when we met! He is saying he "loves me but isn't attracted to my body." This has been devastating to me and confusing since he has really been there for me through disability and a horrible year, and now his feelings, which he points out he "can't help," are so painful to hear. I am now recovered enough to have plastic surgery which I had to postpone due to my back, and I really want to find out if there are any "arm specialists" in my area and/or just plain good plastic surgeons with whom people have had good outcomes and experiences.

[Frosted Cupcake]

I'm so sorry, that sounds like it must be very emotionally painful for you... not to mention the physical ordeal you've been through. If he's a good man, and really does love you as he says, then he will continue to stay firmly by your side and support you through the rest of your process. Remember that a healthy and strong relationship lasts through hard times and good times. I hope that you'll make the decision to have plastic surgery for your own sake, so that you can feel beautiful and healthy, not for the sake of your relationship. The better you feel about yourself, the better relationships you will have, as you'll attract people who love you as much as you love yourself! I wish you all the best and I'm sure that other folks on 3FC will have some great advice for you about good specialists near your area.