100 lb. Club - Putting the brakes on




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Lyn2007
09-23-2008, 10:58 AM
I haven't posted much in awhile... I have been struggling with my eating lately. Last month I gained ten pounds. I got on the scale this morning. I am up 5 pounds from the beginning if THIS month. THAT scared me. If I do not put the brakes on NOW, I am heading back to the same misery I just worked so hard to escape from.

I have been letting my emotions get the best of me, plus it is sheer laziness. I have slacked off eating veggies because they are annoying to prep and I have been letting myself have fast food like 3x a week. That alone will throw the weight on. Just laziness, and not wanting to deal with anything.

Yesterday I made a commitment to change just a few things to start. I decided to cut wayyy back on the sugar again (just a bit in my morning tea, and fruits as snacks). I also told myself, no fast food this week. I had to really fight myself not to stop for fast food on the way home last night at 7pm with tired cranky kids, but I made it home and ate pretty healthy.

I also had stopped exercising almost completely. I am turning that around also, and biked yesterday.

I am dealing with a lot of *junk* in my life. Husband being gone so now I am doing everything alone again. Plus I lost my health insurance and am desperately trying to find coverage. And I had my repeat PAP 2 weeks ago (I had a LEEP/large area of precancerous cells removed this spring and this is to see if it has come back) and they have had a delay in getting the results and I am ripping my hair out worrying about it. And I need a mammo because I had some bad spots on the last one and they need to check if they have grown... but without insurance... not happening. And my children, 3 of them have serious health issues that are stressing me out. Have to take the toddler to a children's hospital for some pretty invasive testing in a couple weeks. The kids do still have health insurance... I don't.

Okay, enough whining. I really need to firm up a daily strategy to get back on track. For now I am winging it.. just trying to eat healthier stuff, not buying junk, getting veggies and fruits into myself, and moving more.

Suggestions welcome. I really just needed to get this all out of my head and face it.


Lovely
09-23-2008, 10:59 AM
:hug: :hug: :hug:

Star2Be
09-23-2008, 11:16 AM
I don't have much to say in the way of suggestions, but I just wanted to tell you how great it is that you're recognizing this problem and making the decision RIGHT NOW to return to a healthy lifestyle and your weight loss plan. That is hard to do, because I'm sure it's frustrating that you've gained a little back. But remember that it's just a little--overall, you've lost 47 lbs and that is AMAZING. To lose that much weight takes lots of hard work, and we all can see how strong you are for getting through such tough times and still coming out on top. That is truly inspirational. You said the weight came from "laziness and not wanting to deal with anything," but it certainly sounds like you have had to deal with a LOT. :hug:

We are all very proud of you, both of the progress you've already made and because you're recognizing a problem and you're deciding to fix it instead of slipping further. Bravo! :cp: And I wish you the best of luck with getting back on track. You can do it!


Sandi
09-23-2008, 11:23 AM
:hug: I know it's so easy to fall back into old habits. I am the queen. But now that you have recognized and stopped in your tracks, just keep going. Failure is not in falling down, but in not getting back up!!!

owlmonkey
09-23-2008, 11:52 AM
Good job getting back on track-we all stray sometimes.
:hug:
:grouphug:

GirlyGirlSebas
09-23-2008, 11:58 AM
Hi Lynn,

I'm so glad you posted as I was wondering where you were and how you were doing. It's so easy to fall back into our lifetime habits when the stress hits. There is so much that you can't control right now, but you can control what you eat and if you exercise. These are two areas where you make all of the decisions and your decisions can benefit you! You deserve to feel great. You deserve to have control over your emotion and your food. You deserve to have piece of mind in at least these two areas of your life.

This may sound corny and be a little hard to do at first....but, I recommend looking at yourself in the mirror each morning...right along with brushing your teeth and hair....and giving yourself a pep talk. "I am worth eating healthy foods and exercising. I am worth the effort and the payoff." At first, it may feel awkward and strange, but there have been many studies about positive self talk. You might be amazed at how much better your outlook will be after a few days.

Hang tough! We're pulling for you.

fiberlover
09-23-2008, 12:03 PM
:hug: :hug: :hug:

just keep swimming
09-23-2008, 01:22 PM
Wow, I can't even imagine what it must be like to be going through all that, but I just want you to know that I think you're pretty amazing for what you've accomplished so far and for getting back on track. Goodness knows I've fallen off more than once! ;)

:hug:

carinna
09-23-2008, 01:25 PM
Now's as good a time as any to get back on that wagon. :hug:

pamatga
09-23-2008, 02:13 PM
I too do not have health insurance and there have been some times in the past couple of years where I did not go to the doctor because of not wanting to have a huge medical bill. However, having said that, I would encourage you to go for a mammogram. There are programs that are underwritten that will cover that cost. Ask and apply. I think, it is important that you do, especially with three young children depending on you.

No, you do not have to do all of this alone. Seek out support through your local county office, a church and/or neighborhood. If other family members can help or a trusted friend, let someone care for the kids while you decompress. The added stress is a call for you to learn to develop a supportive community that you can depend on when your Dh is not available. Besides, it is just such a good thing to have a community. We all live in them but how much do we participate in them.

I hate to run counter to others have said here but your health comes before those extra 10-15 lbs. I am sure they are sodium-induced from the fast food. Eat healthy of course but don't worry about that. You have enough on your plate already. That can come later when your life has simmered down.

First things first. Mammogram. Care for the kids. Extra rest. Someone to talk to, cry with and give hugs. here are a few until you get some good ones there.:hug::hug:

michellenew
09-23-2008, 02:13 PM
:hug:
hi Lynn

i took off for few months myself, and i always taught about you and the other ladies around while i was missing
is so much easier to pick unhealthy choices but is mo much worth not to do it.
i know that you've worked so hard to loose the weight, and i remember you were riding your bike pretty much everyday...why don't you try again...just for few minutes...few times a week...you can do it
i know you can
one step at a time till you back on track
:goodluck:
michellenew:hug:

Schmoodle
09-23-2008, 02:48 PM
Hi Lyn, I'm glad to see you posting, I was watching for you on the accountability chat and peeking at your blog. I saw you were still blogging so I knew you hadn't given up. The other chicks are much more eloquent than me, but as always I am pulling for you. I think we are alike in that I can't have sweets around for an occasional treat, just won't work, and you can't let yourself have fast food, it's a slippery slope. You have hit your challenge. Maybe focus on eating healthy and kicking the sugar and fast food habit for now, and don't worry about losing, just try to maintain until you get your footing back?

Lyn2007
09-23-2008, 03:32 PM
Thanks so much for all the supportive words.

I am doing well today with my eating. I really am trying to just focus on breaking my bad habits I let back in (buying junk, and eating fast food). Yesterday I wanted fast food SO BAD but I skipped it and came home. Again today I was out shopping and let myself get hungry. It is SO EASY to just grab a burger or some kind of junk in the store, but instead, I bought a rotisserie chicken for $5 and some fresh walnuts, and came home and ate like 6oz of chicken. When I feel up to it I am going to roast some green beans for a snack. I just have to start THINKING and saying no to bad ideas. Eating healthy is really enjoyable when you get into the habit of it.

I do definitely need to build some support around me. I have no family except my 5 children, and while I do have a few friends I don't really have anyone I can lean on. That's gotta change, just not quite sure how yet.

Glory87
09-23-2008, 03:52 PM
Hey Lyn, sorry to hear about your health issues and your other struggles. I can only speak from my own perspective, but making things offlimits helped me immensely (I know some people hate offlimits so I understand this may not be an option). For me, it just simplified things - for fast food - I just don't eat fast food, I don't do that. I don't even remember missing it/craving it and it's not even a blip on my radar anymore - it's not a factor in my life at all.

Definitely don't try to wing it right now. Maybe make a plan for an entire week of healthy eating and then buy the stuff? I hate to waste food/money, so I am more likely to stay on plan if I know I have food at home that will go bad if I don't eat it (kept me out of Chipotle last night, since I already had a salad at home ready to go).

WarMaiden
09-23-2008, 05:25 PM
I pretty much do what Glory does. There are some things that if I let them in my life at all, they will take over; sugar being my biggest thing. Also refined grains. When I don't eat sugar and I don't eat refined grains--when I just absolutely refuse to let those foods have any place at all in my life--then the rest of my diet works itself out.

FB
09-23-2008, 05:35 PM
That's so wonderful, getting back on track despite everything that's going on.

I don't know if it's feasible, because I know it adds to the grocery bill, but perhaps pre-washed and pre-cut vegetables would help you ease your way back into the prep of veggies?

Hugs and strength!

Smiling_Sara
09-23-2008, 08:58 PM
Thanks so much for all the supportive words.

I am doing well today with my eating. I really am trying to just focus on breaking my bad habits I let back in (buying junk, and eating fast food). Yesterday I wanted fast food SO BAD but I skipped it and came home. Again today I was out shopping and let myself get hungry. It is SO EASY to just grab a burger or some kind of junk in the store, but instead, I bought a rotisserie chicken for $5 and some fresh walnuts, and came home and ate like 6oz of chicken. When I feel up to it I am going to roast some green beans for a snack. I just have to start THINKING and saying no to bad ideas. Eating healthy is really enjoyable when you get into the habit of it.

I do definitely need to build some support around me. I have no family except my 5 children, and while I do have a few friends I don't really have anyone I can lean on. That's gotta change, just not quite sure how yet.

Hang in there Lyn, you know you can lean on all of us hear at 3FC. You are such an inspiration. :hug::hug:

Ufi
09-23-2008, 09:32 PM
I've donated to this organization before. They sponsor mammograms. I don't know how you apply, but maybe that's a resource for you? http://www.nationalbreastcancer.org/

Sorry this is such a tough time for you. Maybe it will help to remember that your body will be better fueled to fight off any illness if you eat healthy? Think of it as making time for your health and your future?

I've given up trying to prep veggies when I'm too stressed or busy, and I just end up eating them raw. Bagged salad mix, don't even peel or slice the cucumbers, don't cook the green beans or whatnot. It's just easier. It was a bit difficult to get used to the concept of cold veggies as a meal, but it seems to work for me.

WebRover
09-23-2008, 10:08 PM
Hang in there Lyn. I'm rooting for you. Nothing beats having a plan, even if you only have time to put together one plan and have to keep repeating it. Also, somewhat of a timesaver can be to prepare tomorrow night's dinner tonight while you're doing last minute prep and clean up for tonight's dinner.

For example - last night we ate leftovers from Sunday. While I was heating up leftovers, I mixed up horseradish , dijon mustard and vinegar and spread it over boneless skinless chicken breasts. I baked those in the oven while we were eating dinner and after. We would have been starving if we had waited for those chicken breasts to eat dinner last night. Tonight, I heated up a few of them for dinner with frozen brussells sprouts, and a leftover side. Lunch tomorrow will involve chicken also. Since this is the first time we've eaten this dish this week, it doesn't feel like leftovers, yet.

Or if you can cook up a large amount of something and eat variations of it several times during the week. It always seems easier and faster to be reheating something and adding a little to it than to be cooking the whole meal at once.

I've been eating off plan the past week - too many temptations (or whatever my excuse it). I'm going to be cheering for you to get back on plan while I work on doing the same for myself.

WebRover

Lyn2007
09-25-2008, 01:33 AM
Thanks everyone.

Today I really kicked some butt. I had 3 good healthy meals, and I biked 30 minutes and strength trained 2 sets of everything. However, I also ate ice cream and some chocolate chips. Shouldnt have ice cream in the house, bad habit I fell back into this month. I am definitely not buying any more junk though.

I consider the exercise a victory, as well as NOT having fast food or buying anymore junk. I will do even better tomorrow.

Beverlyjoy
09-25-2008, 07:00 AM
Lyn - I am so, so sorry that you have been struggling with life, food, and health issues. :hug:

Yes, try and take advantage of any free health programs that are available out there.

I am so glad you posted about these struggles...because, honestly, just stating these things often help. I think it's like a catharsis in a way.

Try to do some deep breathing...it's very helpful when you are feeling stressed.

Just know that your friends here at 3fc are always here for you.

Take it a day at a time.

H8cake
09-25-2008, 12:36 PM
Hi Lyn, everybody has given you such good advice. I just wanted to add a :hug: I'm so sorry you are going through some rough times. I read your blog too, and am so proud of you for not giving up. Those kids need a healthy mom and you deserve a healthy body. We're rooting for you!

aliciag57
09-25-2008, 02:33 PM
Hi Lynn.....:hug::hug::hug:

I am so sorry that you are going through all of this.

I know how it feels to get back a positive pap when you thought you would be OK. I had a cone biopsy done last January. The Pap after that was negative. I went in for another in August and I just found out that it is positive. I have to get another pap smear in December so the surgeon can make sure it is positive. So, I am trying like **** to put this in the back of my mind.

First and foremost take care of yourself. It sounds like you are doing this already. Hang in there.:hug:


Lyn! I read your blog. You have some amazing recipes!!!!

Pandora123a
09-27-2008, 01:57 AM
Lyn,

I think it is much harder to get back into control after a period of wrestling with it than it is to get on the right track initially. You have amazing strength, and you can do this.

My resource is the Silver Lining Foundation. They also fund mammograms and have other referral sources for free care, particularly related to cancer or precancerous conditions.

Is COBRA unaffordable?

I'm sending hugs and good thoughts...and also prayer.

Lyn2007
09-27-2008, 11:14 AM
Thanks guys. I had a pretty good week. I kept the brakes on and broke some bad habits. It resulted in a screeching halt to the weight GAIN but I haven't really lost any weight, either. Time to tighten up a little more.

Last week I:
stopped buying fast food and eating out
quit buying junk
bought more veggies
started weighing again
increased activity a bit

Now this week I need to ramp it up, keep those good habits and add:
biking at least 3x a week... more would be good
strength training at least 2x a week.... 3 would be better
taking more walks with the kids
EATING veggies/fruits with every meal
watching portions and counting calories again

I think if I do this stuff the weight will start falling back off.

Wish me luck, this stuff pretty much sucks so I will remember how hard it is to get back on track, next time I am tempted to get OFF track again.

And I got my test results yesterday, pap was clear! Everything looked good, now have to wait 6 months for another one! No insurance fix yet, still working on it.

djay
09-27-2008, 11:27 AM
Lyn-You have alot going on. I give you a lot of credit for deciding to take care of yourself anyway! I's easy to forget that taking the easy way out is not taking care of yourself.

Keep up the good work. Glad to see you back on track!

Ufi
09-27-2008, 01:44 PM
Hooray for good test results!

WebRover
09-27-2008, 02:19 PM
Glad to hear of the good pap results.

You deserve to eat well and feel good. I'm glad to hear you're back on track.

Isn't it crazy how it's harder to get back on track than to start initially. But seeing you're off track and getting back on seems to be a key part of what works long term. Congrats for turning around so quickly.

boomer in paradise
09-27-2008, 02:21 PM
Just type "Susan G. Komen" into your browser. This is a wonderful organization that will provide free pap tests and mammograms to those without health insurance. They also provide medical follow through if there are any problems found. I know it sounds incredible, but I have used this service for years and have had the follow up provided to me.
They also sponsor a Race for the Cure, for those among you who are athletes.

Please call them. And to whomever said that it is harder to struggle to get back than to initiate weight-loss, right on!