Weight Loss Support - I'm new and you're going to hate everything I say :(

04-07-2008, 07:54 PM
I know I'm probably doing this the total wrong and unhealthy way, but I can't waver from this. I am so determined to do it this way for the next 2 months, after that I will relax and do it more realistically.

BUT... I was 204 lbs a month ago, and am now 188. I'm 5' 3". Since starting on a 1000-1200 cal a day diet, (with lots of protein, little carbs) hardcore about 2 weeks ago, that's when the weight loss really started.

And I really really want to look 40-50 pounds by May 30th for my wedding. :(

And this is when I think all of you are going to tell me I'm crazy!

But I want to do it and am so determined.
I'm mostly eating 1000-1100 cal a day, and run 3 times a week (couch to 5 K, so not major running)

What do you all think? Possible?

PS, I take NV daily, it really helps. My energy has been through the roof, I've been feeling so good about myself, I even want to cut myself down to less calories, but don't know if that will backfire.

04-07-2008, 08:11 PM
happeningf, :wel3fc:

OK, I don't hate everything you say, but I do want to make you aware of a few things. :) One is that most sources indicate a person should go below 1200 calories ONLY if you are on a medically supervised program. It's just too risky in terms of getting enough nutrients.

Another is that by forcing your body into starving, you are actually slowing your metabolism and making it hold onto fat reserves. That's just the opposite of what you want to do! You want to increase your rate of metabolism so that your body will burn the stored fat.

It's unrealistic, I'm sorry to say, for you to lose 40 to 50 pounds by May 30. Not without hurting yourself. You don't want to lose weight for your wedding and end up gaining it all back again... I assume...

We have many members here who can tell you stories of what they did in the name of their wedding, and how it made life harder later on.

I don't know what NV is--but feeling better and better while eating less and less is a sign of an eating disorder beginning. You do not want to go there! :no:

So, what to do? I'd suggest that you look into a reasonable plan, like Weight Watchers or any of the other plans that have been shown to work in the long term. You can lose maybe 10 pounds by May 30--that would be doing good, and it would be a healthy loss.


04-07-2008, 08:13 PM
Here's the thing.

Losing 20 lbs a month (5 lbs a week) is barely realistic if you weigh in the high 200's, when your weight loss is naturally going to be faster. At lower weights, it is almost impossible, and pretty much -is- impossible to do in a healthy, sustainable way.

1000-1100 calories a day is probably too low to meet your nutrient needs, unless you are following a specifically formulated plan designed to meet all your needs. Failing to meet those nutritional needs will cause your weight loss to stall, and will make it harder for you to lose even on those low calorie levels in the future. Cutting even lower will backfire, but even as low as you are now, it will probably already backfire.

There just isn't any healthy, sustainable (or even non-dangerous!) way to meet that goal in your timeline.

You CAN, though, make a commitment to making healthy changes up until the wedding, and just seeing what your body does. With strength training, a good eating plan, and cardio, you can definitely see visible results within that timeframe. I'd up both your food and your exercise, and add in some weights to get good muscle tone. You'll look fabulous in the dress, even if your scale reads just a bit higher than you'd like it to.

04-07-2008, 08:13 PM
Backfire big time!!!!

I did that for about 3 months and lost 35 pounds for a vacations and gained it alllllll back.

If you know that this is unhealthy and you are doing it just to look good for your wedding, are you looking for a life-style or a quick-fix?

This could also lead to anorexia.

Please, please don't go under 1,200 cals a-day....esp. with all the working out you are doing.

04-07-2008, 08:20 PM
One more thought...I started out with a magic number in my head for my wedding, too...but when I got there, I was above it. I still looked and felt good, just knowing how far my body had come. So even if you don't get all the way to where you want to go, you can still feel great about how far you've come in a healthy, sustainable way.

2 months of low calories, by the way, is enough to start your hair falling out more rapidly (a known symptom of eating too little) and your skin dulling. And what good is losing weight for your wedding if you're going to have thinned hair and dull skin? A healthy, happy you will look so much better than a paler, weaker version who has been undereating for 2 months!

04-07-2008, 08:20 PM
How about if you keep your calories above 1200 and increase your exercise? I agree with Amanda that three days of exercise a week isn't really much -- instead, you could bump that up to six days, do at least 30 minutes of Couch to 5K or other cardio, and add in 30 minutes of weight training, yoga, or pilates. You'll get better results by increasing exercise than by drastically cutting calories AND you'll look a whole lot better in your wedding dress. :carrot:

04-07-2008, 08:49 PM
I'm a wedding photographer and see starving, burnt out and unhappy brides quite often.

Rather than making yourself unhealthy during this last short time before your wedding- why not concentrate on making yourself a radiant, relaxed bride?

We see all sorts of bridal body types and most could use upper body work, which is more noticeable than a few extra pounds- esp if you're going strapless. Healthily work on areas like your arms, chest and back, most brides could use a little toning in those areas!

Have fun with the short remaining time before your wedding! The day goes by sosososo fast, and you'll want to be aware, happy and healthy for every minute.

04-07-2008, 08:54 PM
Got it guys, thanks. But I hear both your side of things and the other side, that doing something drastic while isn't the best approach works for the short-term, which for now I'm only invested in. Sorry to say, but I'm being honest.

I'll do my best to maintain after the honeymoon (PS, I'm more concerned about honeymoon in Tahiti than the wedding) but I feel like I can't help but try to do this.

And people do and promote fasts or cleanses all the time! How come no one mentions "starvation mode" for those diets?

04-07-2008, 08:56 PM
Backfire big time!!!!

I did that for about 3 months and lost 35 pounds for a vacations and gained it alllllll back.

If you know that this is unhealthy and you are doing it just to look good for your wedding, are you looking for a life-style or a quick-fix?

This could also lead to anorexia.

Please, please don't go under 1,200 cals a-day....esp. with all the working out you are doing.

To your point, quick fix. I'll work on the lifestyle later. ;) Sorry!

04-07-2008, 09:00 PM
Only 10 pounds by May 30th!?!! Are you kidding? That sounds awfully low. I figured you guys would see 20 pounds in 2 months as realistic, at least?

You all keep mentioned sustain, maintence after loss, etc. And I'm sorry to say but I'm not concerned about that, at this time. I feel I have to drop weight fast for this honeymoon/wedding. No choice. And I am determined to.
After this hurdle I will and promise to do all things healthy and for sustainable purposes.

04-07-2008, 09:10 PM
I think you could probably lose 30-40 lbs doing low carb with exercise. I know my first 2 months I dropped 30 lbs without exercise but I was at a much higher weight. I've noticed that the lower my weight, the slower it takes to lose the weight.

04-07-2008, 09:10 PM
I don't understand this mindset, and I can't, even working in the wedding industry every day. I know I can't change your mind, but again offer my perspective.

What are you hoping to achieve for your wedding day? I assume it's to be an astonishingly gorgeous bride. I swear to you I see heartbreakingly gorgeous girls at our consultations all the time who are absolutely wilted, dried out and less than stellar looking on their big day because they take the same measures.

Seriously, your energy would be best spent doing it healthy, taking care of your body and skin and relaxing before your wedding day. I can't tell you how many times I've been disappointed for a bride because she hasn't taken proper care of herself for her wedding and it shows in her pictures.

Again, I know your mind won't be changed! Best of luck to you in your wedding and happily ever afters.

P.S. You probably don't hear people talking starvation mode for detoxes and cleanses because they generally don't do those for two months.

04-07-2008, 09:12 PM
PPS: I'm so not saying you shouldn't try to lose weight before your big day- go for it! Just keep your best interests in mind.

04-07-2008, 09:14 PM
I understand what you mean about the cleanses, that makes sense.

What about people who get Gastric Bypass? They shrink their stomachs down and then eat drastically less daily. Now are they losing body fat or muscle, and is that okay?

I will take advice on upping to around 1200 and working out more. I'm really trying to listen to my body and see how I feel each day. Thank you all very much.

04-07-2008, 09:15 PM
1-2 pounds a week is considered to be a safe weight loss. You have seven weeks you might be able lose 14 pounds.Starvation mode is not a fast weight loss method, in fact if your body goes into starvation mode you will lose at a slower rate and sometimes not at all. When your body think it is being starved it will try and hold on to all the weight it can.

04-07-2008, 09:30 PM
People who get gastric bypass or other weight loss surgery, first off, have way more to lose than you do. They have the surgery, because the health risks associated with their excess weight are WORSE than the health effects that come with the restricted diet...you aren't in that position. In addition, many of them have trouble with hair falling out, and that is even WITH them working with nutritionists to make sure they're meeting all the nutritional needs they can. You, with no nutritional support, wouldn't be in a comparable situation.

04-07-2008, 10:23 PM
Medifast diet says you can lose 20lbs a month, if you could afford it maybe you can look into that =) Also you should take a prenatal vitamin which is what most gastric bypass patients have to take because they can't eat as much. I also think Fat Smash helps lose weight fast with their healthy eating book, in the first Phase (10 days) I lost 14lbs and others lost between 5-15 and in the first month I've heard a lot of people losing 20. No matter what keep health on your mind, make sure the things you do eat have lots of nutrients and vitamins =)

04-07-2008, 10:28 PM
At this point, I hope you can take what you will from the replies and remember to pay close attention to the signs your body is giving you.

From there, remember you will find support here. There are lots of dieting stories in this place!

Good luck. I like the suggestion to tone your upper body. That will make all the difference in photos. :workout:

04-07-2008, 10:31 PM
Sorry, but I have to jump in and agree with what others have said here.

A couple of years ago, I was on a Very Low Calorie Diet. I was only eating 700 calories a day, but I was supplementing my diet with a variety of pills and injections from a doctor who had prescribed the diet. Boy, did the weight fly off! I lost 12lbs in the first 5 days (ok, probably a lot of that was water weight, but still... that's a lot to lose from Friday to Wednesday!). About a month later, I noticed that my hair started to fall out. And I noticed that I couldn't lift as much at the gym, or go as long on the elliptical trainer. I felt drained all the time. I was tired and crabby.

Also, after the first month, I noticed that the I started losing at a slower rate. I figured "I'll just eat less!" and that's what I did. I got down to 500 calories/day. When I went over that limit, I ran my finger down my throat and ejected all stomach contents into the toilet. At this point, I noticed what was the worst of all: I was afraid to eat. I was afraid to have a slice of dry, whole wheat toast. I had a crippling fear that I would gain back 40lbs overnight. I cried with worry all the time. It became all I could think about. I weighed myself 9-10 times a day. I OD'd on laxatives. I used ipecac to induce vomiting. I exercised 2-3 hours/day, 6 days/week.

I started to get scared, and lots of my friends were scared for me. They were worried because they never saw me eat anything anymore, and I was dropping weight fast. I didn't look healthy, either. I looked like a cancer patient.

A month more down the line, I had a checkup with my regular doctor, and she commented on my weight loss. She asked how I'd accomplished it in such a short amount of time (40lbs in about 2 months), and when I told her, she wrote me a referral to a nutritionist and a therapist. It turns out that the "doctor" who'd put me on this crazy diet was essentially dealing speed to me. Who knows what the other pills and injections that he said were "vitamins" really were.

Now, it's taken me years to get over this experience. I had/still have a very real fear of food, and of the scale. I started out that experience at 233, and got down to about 190 before everything fell apart. So, picture yourself on your wedding day, falling apart in this same way. Picture yourself on your honeymoon, stuck in the bathroom because you've got intentionally induced diarrhea.

I realize that the plan you've outlined includes more calories than the plan I was on, and we're different people, etc. I'm just thinking that the desperation of your first post sounds strikingly similar to the desperation that I had at the time that I went down this path. :shrug: And, I'm sorry to be so graphic, but I am just trying to be completely honest with you. The plan that you've outlined sounds dramatic, but it's the attitude behind the plan that sounds even scarier. You seem willing to do anything to take drastic amounts of weight off quickly, and that leads to dangerous situations.

While you may not be interested in your long-term health right now, try to have the foresight to realize that one day your long-term health may be important to you. You may, at some point, want to lose weight in a rational, healthy way that is sustainable. If you do this to yourself now, you may lose weight, but you probably will not be able to keep it off (I gained back 30 of the 40 that I lost). If you do this to yourself now, you will be setting yourself up for a lot of damage later. Not only is it bad for your metabolism, it's bad for your heart and other organs, and it's bad for your self-image. :hug:

I hope you'll reconsider your goals and find a balanced plan that will put you on your wedding day with a great smile and a healthier you and a bucket load of self-esteem. I apologize if this sounds pushy or anything, I just felt compelled to share my experience in the hope that it may keep you from making the same mistakes I did. Please do stay around and keep us updated. You'll find that everyone here just really wants you to succeed and wants you to be healthy.:hug:

04-07-2008, 11:51 PM
happeningf -- Congrats on your wedding! That's an exciting time!

It sounds like you have a plan that you really want to try. You've asked for advice, and received a lot of it. I don't need to repeat that a lot of people think you're being too extreme, but you did ask.

At this point, it sounds like you've heard the advice and are making some adjustments, but it also sounds like you don't want to really focus on the long term right now and have made your decision. Therefore, I'm going to go ahead and close this thread.

Good luck!