My diet has room for dessert, even sinful ones like Ben and Jerry's. But, overall, I have balance. I'm eating far more veggies, fruits and whole grains then ever before.
One trick I've done is to pick something extremely rich. One quarter cup of some over-the-top decadent ice cream is more satisfying than a whole bag of shortbread cookies. The Ben and Jerrys (Phish Food) I had the other night was something like 270 calories per 1/2 cup serving, so 1/4 cup would be only 135 calories. A serving of Knotts Strawberry Shortbread cookies is also about that number but nowhere near as mentally satisfying! One time I found this ice cream that was so very rich that I couldn't eat much at all and I wasn't even on a diet at the time!
One time when I was on a diet I set up a weekly reward. If I kept to the plan all week, I'd stop by TCBY on the way home on Friday for a special treat. Now, my treat was only a scoop or two of frozen yogurt. This way, the splurge calories were spread over a whole week. Hey, maybe that's an idea. Give yourself, say, 100 "binge" calories as a daily reward for keeping on the diet. But, on any given day, you can choose to "bank" those 100 calories to use towards something extra sinful like a hot fudge sundae with nuts.