Weight Loss Surgery - a poem "A funny thing happened on the way to surgery" OR "My new leather thong" hehe

I woke one day
unable to say
where I had gone wrong

I was larger then
I had ever been
I no longer fit in my thong

I read online
a story so fine
of a person just like me

who looked at her rear
with great shock and fear
when she backed up, all would flee

she told of a procedure
she took at her leisure
that changed all that she knew

she lost the weight
picked up her gait
then spouted wings and flew

Oh, THAT I wanted
to no longer be stunted
so I dragged myself off to the Doc

fought tooth and toe nail
no insurance could derail
my journey to join up with the flock

Now I can sing
so the mountains ring
with the joy of my fabulous song

flying as high
as the birds in the sky
sporting my new leather thong!


:rofl:

Thanks,

Angela

<gulp> leather thong??? oh MY!!!!!!

going for the most outragous...sorry :o just trying to make you all laugh.

You made me laugh!!! Loved the poem Ange :D

Hugs,

Ammi :chicken:

:whoo::rofl::rofl::cofdate:

That's funny I don't care who you are!!!!!

Thanks for the smile!

Thanks Annme and whitelion, wasn't too sure my silly sense of humor would strike anyone but me as funny! LOL

Angela

Yikes! Leather thong!?! Kind of kinky!! LOL! I'm afraid at this point if I'm wearing a thong, it is not by choice! You know what I mean?! I'm not a judgemental person, but my size 13 underwear was hanging down to my knees and decided that I need to buy myself something new and instead of looking for underwear at a resale place!!!! So my 15 and 16 year old grandsons went shopping for WII stuff and granny underwear. While I was over at the underwear area the grandsons pulled up and decided that this was not a place they wanted to stay very long. But, at the same time they pulled up, and I'm not exaggerating one bit, a woman with the biggest rear-end I have ever seen, came strolling over and picked up a pair of lacy thong underwear and held it up to her waist. You talk about giggles and fits. I thought the grandsons were going to swallow their tongues. One even stuck his hat in is mouth to muffle the laughter. I abruptly walked off and I heard one of the boys, deadpan serious, tell the other one "Boy that is going to leave a mark!" Then, me, a woman with a big fat flabby rump, laughed until I was weak and had to sit down. I don't know why it was so funny, but if and I'm saying if, that woman even tried to wear those things you would never, never, ever see them again. I wonder if you can get gangrene from those things!!! LOL!!!!

OT topic: I've decided that if I'm ever in an accident and because all of my clothes and bras have come from Goodwill and Salvo and most of them have some one's name marked on the labels. They won't really know my name. Alice on my bra label shirt has Beth, and my jeans have Martha!

NANJ!!! You should get a tattoo of your name on your bum, that way what ever name is on your clothes the EMT's will know who you are! :rofl:

too funny!

Angela

:joker::joker::joker::joker:

great poem, ange! an artist and a poet!

nanj, your story is a riot! if i put on a thong, I'd never find it again! I don't think i'd wear one if i was thin. i mean, on a daily basis, what's the point?:eek:

You know, a tatoo on my rump with my name might be the answer!

But.......with all the dips, rolls, bumps and flabbiness, I'm afraid that they would think that it was Egyptian hieroglyphics and my butt would be sent off to some museum. Probably where it belongs anyway!!!

They wouldn't have trouble seeing it especially if I had on that leather thong!!

NANCY!!!!!! BUY SOME NEW UNDIES!!!!!! at this point, darlin, having lost just a hair under 100 pounds you certainly deserve some!!!!!

and i DO MEAN NEW - not at goodwill!!!!

I did last night. Yesterday my little grandson missed the bus and I threw on my robe, put some undies on and boots and out the door! When I got back I was walking funny and realized that I had put both legs in one leg hole of my underwear. IT WAS TIME!!!!

one leg? :lol: I don't care how big they were, how did you not notice you were wearing mini-skirt undies with one baggie side?! hehehe

hey, you might start a new trend!

Angela

You got me laughing so hard the tears are coming and then I keep reading any it only makes it worse. About time you bought some BRAND new undies!! I am so happy for the success you have had so far. Keep up the good work.

Yes to all others we have a good (sometimes warped) sense of humor.

some of us more warped then not! :devil:

I love that I can come here and giggle. I like to laugh and I am grateful to have done so as much as I have these last few weeks.

Thanks everyone, :grouphug:

Angela

Leather Thong :faint: just give me a paint roller and some black paint...at least you'd be able to see it.

how about a tatoo of a thong?