100 lb. Club - Scary incident with chewy granola bars
11-15-2007, 03:43 AM
So, it's currently 2:30am and I have now been up for more than an hour stressing over and freaking out about 4 Quaker chewy granola bars... chocolate covered peanut butter to be exact.
I went to bed around 11:30pm and woke up at 1:20am for no reason that I can recall... but I went to the kitchen, opened a new box of chewy granola bars and ate 4 in the space of approximately 5 minutes and got back in the bed. We're talking 600 calories worth of chewy granola bars! :eek: I had not been back in the bed for more than 5 minutes when I started having this terrible feeling of dread which progressed into a full blown anxiety attack with hysterical crying... all of this over CHEWY GRANOLA BARS!!!! Sure it's 600 calories I now have to account for - so I'll have a light breakfast and lunch and maybe skip one of my snacks, I've already added the granola bars to my fitday.
I think the really terrifying part of this for me was seeing how quickly I could lose control. This is really the first "unexpected incident" that I have had since starting this journey and I really needed an hour to review how far I've come and to convince myself that yes, I can do this but I have to forgive myself and move forward.
As for the remaining chocolate covered peanut butter granola bars, well they have all been removed from their nice individual wrappers and thrown in the trash. And for good measure, I emptied the bathroom waste baskets on top and then threw in all the tissues from my crying spell - no more crying over granola bars!!
Anyway, thanks for letting me get this out there... now maybe I can get a few hours of sleep before I have to get ready for work.
11-15-2007, 03:51 AM
I am familiar with that feeling of dread. I always end up saying I'll write it for my calories tomorrow but I end up being so hungry that I just say, "to **** with it, I'm eating my calories for today and not do it again!" of course, it might happen again but ah, such is life. The important thing to remember is that you didn't gain all of this weight from 4 granola bars. Once in awhile it will happen, but you're doing great :: you're picking yourself up again and hopefully learning from your mistakes! If you get too hungry tomorrow from the granola bars, maybe make a small salad and don't let yourself starve! ;)
11-15-2007, 05:57 AM
Gina, I agree that does feel scary. I wonder though, what did you eat during the day? I mean, perhaps you ate a food that triggered that. Recently I have been trying to follow the no "whites" and no coffee thing and it's made HUGE difference in my wanting to binge feeling. Maybe you just need to adjust the kinds of food you are eating. Considering what you've already lost, it's sure not just about "willpower";) You hang in there, girl!
11-15-2007, 07:24 AM
Those things are baad for me. I can't eat just one. I would do the same exact thing, so I just stopped buying them. They also have HFCS. Good for you for getting rid of them.
11-15-2007, 07:35 AM
:carrot: Good for you for getting rid of them. I too have this problem with certain foods, I hope one day to overcome it.
11-15-2007, 08:06 AM
Oh can I sympathize and relate to you. 1000%. I remember the first time during my journey when I devoured something, kept telling myself to stop and kept right on doing it anyway. It was a box of high fiber cereal. I was totally out of control. I had lost it. It WAS a scary feeling. All that control I had gained - out the window. I was terrified.
But you know what, I got past it, was GLAD that I was scared. Used it, learned from it - I knew right then and there that I was ALWAYS going to be that fat person, the one who will always be tinkering on the edge - remembered it, moved on.
Weight wise/calorie wise there was not much damage done. So don't fret about it. No need to beat yourself up over it, whatsoever. It happens. Period. It's going to happen again. And you'll move past it then again as well. I'm glad you've gotten rid of them. And I know for sure you'll get that control back again. :hug:
By the way, as far as I'm concerned, for ME that is, those granola bars and all of them are just glorified candy bars. I simply can't have them around. Yup, I'm still the fat person, always will be. :(
11-15-2007, 08:50 AM
Oh yeah, it's that feeling of having lost control that's the worst! You did well to banish the rest from the house and to assess the damage. I'm with Robin -- use the fear!!
Know that it probably happens to everyone of else from time to time, but it doesn't have to be devastating!! Good luck!
11-15-2007, 08:57 AM
I can relate also. I cannot have WW SF Fudgesicles in my house. I will eat 3 in one sitting. OMG they are so good.
Cuter w Curves
11-15-2007, 09:28 AM
I can relate only for me it is fudgeos... Which is horrid because then I itch all night too...
11-15-2007, 09:59 AM
I hate that out of control--I just don't want to stop feeling. I'm so glad you tossed them. Granola is one of the things that call to me when they are in the house.
11-15-2007, 10:10 AM
Gina, yes, forgive yourself and move on. I'm sure it's happened to a lot of us here, certainly to me. Just consider it a 600 calorie lesson learned. I can't have any of those bar things around because they are just like candy bars to me.
11-15-2007, 10:56 AM
The out of control feeling is a scary thing. I had a similar episode with a box of Kashi bars and quickly learned that the whole "bar" thing was a real trigger for me. Use what you learned from this and it won't be a 600 calorie mistake, it'll be a 600 calorie learning experience. Feel better!
11-15-2007, 12:16 PM
yup, every one of us can relate i'm sure -- mine was this weekend! I was in the same boat as you -- for the past 4 months I havent' gone "crazy" and it was about 11:30, i was staying up late watching movies, and by the time I was done I'd eaten some coleslaw, 3 slices of turkey, 3 big chunks of cheese and a granola bar --- i was definitely concerned over the WHY (not so much the what - it's not like it was a large pizza and a dozen beer or anything) and I finally realized i'd hit a "oh my god i STILL have a hundred motherf**ng (sorry) pounds to go what's the friggin point????" moment!!! so i beat that thought into submission and carried on!
be thankful it was ONLY a few granola bars! it wasn't a pint of ice cream or 3 double cheeseburgers!!! and you SEE IT for what it is!!! yay!!!
11-15-2007, 03:33 PM
it sounds like we've all had our own scary incidents - you arent alone! I fell to tostitos and sun chips one night where I ate close to an entire (not individual size) bag! The feeling of disapointment afterwards is what pushes me through. I thought I could do it perfectly.. but I'm human and it caught up with me :) You can perservere!! (my own episode inspired my little weight lifter down there)
11-15-2007, 05:02 PM
:hug: you can see you are by far not alone with this experience. I had a little incident with cheesecake yesterday myself and have done so much worse than that in the past. For me, that is when I say "I can't do this, see?" and give up...but DON"T DO THAT, don't let 3 granola bars whoop you! You are stronger than the granola, and I am stronger than cheesecake...we can still do this, we are just human :hug:
11-15-2007, 06:06 PM
You all are so wonderful!! :grouphug: I am amazed every day (yes, I am here EVERY DAY) by the outpouring of support on this site.
There have been so many things mentioned that really hit home for me that I had not considered.
1 - I did not get to be this weight because of one incident with some granola bars. Oh no, it was many incidents with many many foods.
2 - It could have been so so so much worse. There were times when I would have downed the entire box with hardly a second thought. Having an anxiety attack because of 4 granola bars must be progress, right!?!
3 - Chocolate covered granola bars will not enter my house again. They had been in the house for 3 weeks with no calling from the pantry, but when they called, I answered so they are henceforth uninvited!
I remember the first time during my journey when I devoured something, kept telling myself to stop and kept right on doing it anyway. It was a box of high fiber cereal. I was totally out of control. I had lost it. It WAS a scary feeling. All that control I had gained - out the window. I was terrified.
This is spot-on to how I was feeling... absolutely terrifying.
Thank you all for so much support. I have definitely learned alot in past 24 hours. Some granola bars took me to school - so to speak. :book2:
11-16-2007, 06:06 PM
It is ONLY 600 calories and it is ONLY one incident and it is ONLY one speed bump in your journey to lose weight.
I know that it is always a shock when we fall "short" of how we imagine how we "should" be but what really matters is that you get right back on your food plan and put it behind you.
Thank you for sharing, being real and being honest!! :carrot: That deserves a double dip to ya:hug::hug: