[Jen]

Hi there. I have posted on this forum before getting support in coping with my husband who has some mood issues. He doesn't fit all of the symptoms of clinical depression but he has a lot of mood swings, he gets angry a lot, he seems to have a hard time enjoying life sometimes. I wonder sometimes if he'd be better off without me and our son, I don't think he takes much enjoyment out of being part of a family where sometimes he has a lot of fun doing the things he wants to do when he wants to do them. For example a few years back he was racing stock cars but we really couldn't afford it and he had to quit and sell a lot of his stuff. I know he is not happy about not being able to race but it is just something that is out of our range. We were huge in debt and probably would have had to declare bankruptcy if he'd gone on much longer. As it is we are many years behind financially where we should be considering our incomes (that's what I get depressed about) but he doesn't seem to care as long as it was something that made him happy he didn't care what it was doing to us financially. We will still be years getting out of the debt we accrued while he was racing.

Anyway he went to the doctor a couple of years back because he came to realize that things were just not right with the way he was feeling. After experimenting with a few different meds he settled on taking Effexxor 37.5mg a day and that really seemed to make a big difference. Things were really good for a long while. Then the insurance company switched him from the brand name drug to the generic and after taking that for a few months he seemed to be reverting back to his previous moods. His sister had the same problem taking the generic Effexxor and had her doctor specifically prescribe the brand name and she had better results. So he got his doctor to do the same thing and gradually his mood started to improve, I would say this was in the past 2 months but in the last couple of weeks he seems to be going backwards again. I am wondering if he needs to increase his dosage, he is taking a pretty low dose and perhaps his body has gotten used to this dosage and it is not as effective anymore. He is upset because he realizes that his mood is getting worse but I suppose he feels powerless over it. That of course just adds to it.

Sorry this has been long but I wanted to provide the whole picture so that you could get a good idea of what I am talking about. Any thoughts or opinions? I know there are people here who have been on different meds before so I am looking for your feedback based on your experiences.

[settie]

Originally Posted by Jen

....who has some mood issues. He doesn't fit all of the symptoms of clinical depression but he has a lot of mood swings, he gets angry a lot, he seems to have a hard time enjoying life sometimes. I wonder sometimes if he'd be better off without me and our son, I don't think he takes much enjoyment out of being part of a family....

This sounds exactly like I was before I started treatment for my depression.

I have been on a number of different meds. Some that seemed to work for a while and then didn't, some that never worked. Effexor didn't work for me but I know it works for many others. I'm on a generic Celexa at the moment and it seems fine. I'm also on real Wellbutrin now because the XL doesn't come in generic but when I was on a different dosage it was generic. I've never seen a difference.

As for your hubby, taking more isn't always the best solution. Sometimes taking more than one is. Is he able to get to a psychiatrist? I finally went to on after many years and he was bang on with my meds. Also, I'm currently seeing a psychologist who's helping me a lot. I know they're fairly expensive and insurance companies don't always pay.

Good luck to both of you. It's a rough road.

[Jen]

When he first went to the dr for this she referred him to a psychiatrist who said he wasn't depressed, he just needed anger management. Regardless his family dr still prescribed something which seemed to work very well. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't want to try and switch meds as he tried out a few way back when and it was actually worse than not having anything. Could have been because he tried too many in a short time period but the pharmacist told me that he was off one med long enough before the next one that there shouldn't have been more than 1 med in his system at a time. So I'd want to inquire about an increase in Effexor maybe to 75mg and see what that does before scrapping it altogether and trying something new.

[fatinmass]

Try another psychiatrist until you find one that truly believes there is an issue. Too many times GPs flip open their Rx pads and write a script for the late. It took me some time and many interviews to finally find my fit with my psychiatrist and my psychologist. And I do mean interviews; they work for me, for my best interest, so there has to be a fit. Perhaps your husband does need anger management, which a psychologist will do, but perhaps he also needs the meds to either help get him back on track until he has the tools to manage his moods on his own. Or perhaps there is a slight chemical imbalance where he will need to continue with the meds. You mentioned he had a family member on Effexor too and depression, etc. tends to run in the family.

Also, I was on Effexor for a while and it worked great but then when it started to not work my dr. decided to move me to a new med (Lexapro) instead of increasing the amount of Effexor which would have increased the side-effects.

Best of luck and know that your husbands illness and issues are his and not yours. You need to take care of you and your son first!

~fatinmass

[witchyonadiet]

I agree that increasing dosage is not always the right way to go. Sometimes it's just not the right one or you need more than one. I was treated for years for depression and nothing worked for very long - turns out I have Bipolar II and now that I am combination meds I am getting my life under control. You definately need a doctor who understands there is a major problem and is willing to work with both of you.

Also - many times therapy in combination with meds works very well - that is what I am doing and most qualified psychiatrists will not continue to prescribe unless you are actively in therapy - that is just from MY experience.

[Jen]

Thanks everyone for their replies and I'm sorry it took awhile to get back to this. Dh talked about going to the dr about his meds but things seem to be better right now. He was very stressed about our son's birthday party and a BBQ that we had in the same day but I didn't find that out until last week. He seems a lot better since then so I've held back on the issue. Yes his sister is also on Effexor, quite a large dose actually, about 10 times what my dh is taking. She was almost ready to come off of it and then her insurance company switched her over to the generic brand and it really messed her up so she had to back on a full dose of the brand name drug. She talked to a friend of hers who is a pharmacist and said that the generic brand is not 100%the same as the brand name, it only has to be comparable. I'm sure that it works fine if you start out on that but it seems to me that switching from the brand name to the generic drug is like starting a completely new med in some respects without being weaned off the old one. I don't know if any of you have to deal with the insurance company but definately this may be something that you need to keep an eye on.

[purplepansy912]

Hi.. I'm not an MD, but I'm a nurse and I have a husband with similar issues. I deeply believe my husband has bi- polar aspects of his behaviors. I"m not saying he has true bipolar but his anger issues and severe mood changes have increased over the years, leading me to believe he has a mixed diagnoses. I have asked him to go for 'help' and he refuses, telling me how 'superior his mind is' I also wonder if he has some narcist mixed in there.
I do for myself and my kids.. who are nearly grown now. Hubby is a big boy and can tend to his own issues.
Your husband has at least seen the light in trying to get some help. Just direct him on the right path. There is nothing wrong with upping the dose or even trying tons of meds...
good luck..
ps... I remember you from a long way back Jen.. good luck to you..