New to 30-somethings - cross post from Introductions
I'm so depressed. I've been sick for a few weeks, went to the urgent care, got weighted, and about fainted at the number on the scale. I've regained all I lost, and more. I'm scared to try and fail again. I'm having a tough time getting restarted.
I know that exercise and what I eat is the key to making a successful transformation. I've been exercising more consistently since joining a gym in Jan, but sickness of both me, spouse, and kiddos has derailed that. Of course, in the time that I was working out, I didn't lose anything ... and it is all due to my eating.
I need to change. I need to dig deep and rediscover the fire and the passion. I need to rededicate myself to changing *me* at the core, because the deep committment is what it will take. I'm not looking to be the next fitness model, I just want to be a healthy and active role model for my kiddos, who doesn't have such a hard time bending over to get her shoes on (as embarrasing as that is to admit.) I want to be able to paint my toe nails.
Right now, I'm scared that I can't lose, even though I have done it before. I'm scared to make the changes, and to invest the hard work that I know it will take.
I need to sit down and focus on the benefits of changing, and what I will gain by changing ... and weigh it all against the risk of staying this way. I need to look at my unhappiness at my figure, and make the commitment to the exercise daily and awareness of eating, and the planning that the menus take, in order to make the changes I want to see. I need to commit to it long term. I need to rehash my daily schedule to fit in daily time for exercise at home.
So - help me get started. Remind me that the work and the effort put into it properly will get me results, no matter how hard I try to tell myself that it is useless.
I leave on vacation next Wed for 7 days. I'm hoping to 'move' a bit more daily, with walks along the beach, swimming in the pool and ocean. I also want to take advantage of the sports - kayaking, fitness room, etc. But when I return home, it will be time to get serious, but I want to have my plan in mind before then, so I don't feel lost.
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GGF: 
to you for seeking us out! You are most welcome here and we will offer all kinds of support and cheery words! It won't be but a hot second before one or more of our fabulous moderators pop in to welcome you as well! In fact, the best place to be showered with friendship is the daily thread. There are a bunch of us there-and we always love new faces!!! 
Moving toward a goal of healthy weight is not useless. Doesn't matter how many setbacks you encounter-you are here, and that is a positive start! We will always tell you it's ok if you slip up, but will also be the first to give you that kick in the pants you need! 
First of all, being sick will always make things more difficult and put a cloudy damper on your spirits. Now that you're feeling better, it's just one day at a time. In fact, if it's easier...then it's one huge glass of water at a time...and then it's one 10 minute work out session @ a time and so on. I'm newly diagnosed hypothyroid, so I feel sick all the time-and I've decided that the itty bitty baby steps are all I can handle....AND THAT IS OK! Same for you! From your post you seem to think you don't have the drive to handle the change. I'm here to tell ya, that you are giving off a LOT of energy in your words. So guess what? I already see the drive for success in you!!!! 
OK? Have a great weekend and get yourself moving-then check in on the daily as much as you need to (I'm on here like a million times during the week)! GLAD YOU ARE HERE!!! Melinda
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