I would like to know who you share you weight loss journey with. Who do you talk to about it? Friends, family, cyberbuddies? Specifically, I am wondering if you talk about it with people you know personally (not on-line buddies.) I have recently started an weight loss blog. I post my daily menus, exercise, weight loss, and feelings about the day. I though a blog would help keep me accountable for my actions, and it certainly has somewhat. However, the only people who read it are "strangers" -- people in cyberspace that I've never met. I don't even use my real name on it. I was reading another lady's blog who sends out a daily e-mail to her friends/family to report on the day, so she can be accountable. I admire that courage. And I got to thinking how much more accountable I would be if someone I knew in person (like my close friends, mom, grandma, female cousins that I'm close to). If I knew that my mom would read about my Dairy Queen fiasco, I might think twice before eating that 850 calorie brownie earthquake. However, I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to share with others. Obviously, I would be discrete about who I shared it with--people I know well and trust, and some who have also lost weight. Along the same lines, who knows your actual weight? I'm 190 pounds (5'4"), and I won't even tell my mom! Not that ppl can't tell by looking at me that I need to lose some weight. (I could take my actual weight off my blog, and just put how many points I've lost and how many pounds I have until goal.) I would really appreciates everyone's thoughts/experiences on accountability-especially to people you know face-to-face. Has anyone ever regretted sharing their weight loss journey with someone? Have you braved it and been glad you did?
I've shared that I'm doing this with a lot of other people in real life (after a while, they couldn't help but notice the weight loss!)... and obviously here! But I really don't give anybody all the details of what I do day to day. I guess I keep me accountable.
When I weighed nearly 300 pounds I told almost no one. My husband and my doctor knew. Now many people know (or can guess) my starting weight.
You guys here at 3FC know more about "Weight Loss Cheryl" than anyone else on the face of this earth. The only other entity that knows more are my Weight Loss journals. There, I absolutely bare my soul! To me, my weight loss is incredibly personal, and many times I feel quite fragile about myself as I am in the process of losing this weight. I may give others a bit of information from time to time, but you guys and my journals are the only ones in my "Circle of Trust."
For the who holds be accountable part of your question, it is most definitely me and me alone. I'm the one who got me in this mess and I'm the only one who can get me out of it. Although my family is extremely supportive, always complimenting me and telling me how proud they are of me, there really is no one who can do this for me but me. They're not the one exercising every day, they're not the ones doing all the planning, shopping and cooking and most importantly resisting temptation day in and day out. Although they can clearly see how much I've accomplished they can't really and truly understand the things that I am going through. Yes they see the joy I know have, through clothing shopping and all the added energy I have and the huge increase in my activity level, but they really didn't have a clue as to just how miserable I was and therefore they really can't know just how happy I am now. I've come to the fact that weightloss is a very solo effort.
Having said that thank G-d for 3FC. They are the only ones who know exactly what I weighed when I started (except my dr.). They're the only ones who know exactly what I weigh now. I really get to pour my heart out here. I think most people here know exactly what I am going through and feeling. I can share my past misery with them, my struggles, my goals, my success and just everything. I can talk about my "plan" till I'm blue in the face and that's just fine. This has been a very, very emotional journey for me and I'm able to let it out here. I could NEVER do that here at home. It's just a wonderful community with like minded people.
Frankly, I wouldn't want my friends and family to be that involved in my weight situation. My SO knows what I'm doing and is supportive, but I don't talk about it all the time. What could be more boring! And my sisters know that I've lost weight, but I don't go into details.
I'm the one I am accountable to.
I have one long-term friend who is on the same journey, and we compare notes quite often. Right now she's doing maintenance, so we've diverged a little. Other than that, it's you folks on 3FC that I talk with.
Other than just telling my mom that I'm dieting, and occasionally being like, "I'm so sore-- I went to the gym yesterday" with friends, I don't talk about this with anyone but y'all! I learned the hard way that nobody else really cares about how many calories are in each meal, how much time on the treadmill cancels out what snack, etc. They either get really bored or, even worse, start to get resentful.
i've started and stopped and failed so many times that i haven't told anyone and really don't intend to. when the weight comes off and people notice, then i can say, yeah i've lost some weight. i hate to feel like the boy who cried wolf one too many times...of course my dh and kids have noticed...for instance last night my dh said 'i perceive you are dieting....' ( he kindly left out the 'again') because i made him a bag of popcorn and then made a separate 100 c bag for me....
hugs
tracyg
I think for the most part I am the only one who I am accountable to...at least for the food I eat. My boyfriend holds me accountable for how much time I spend at the gym. He is paying for it after all. And I enjoy now telling him just how much I go to the gym. For the first 4 months when i was going to a gym I wasn't really happy with, I hated for him to ask me about the gym. I would even lie on occassion and tell him I was on the way to the gym when really I was on the way home. But now, I am the first one to tell him just how hard my class at the gym was.
I come to 3FC to share my experiences, get (and give) advice and get motivation. There are a whole lot of wonderful people here that I feel connected to (and there are new ones every day!). I love coming here and seeing posts from my "group"--it really inspires me to do my best. Sure, I'll tell everyone when I really mess up--it does help me be accountable, but first and foremost, it is up to me to make myself be accountable for my actions or inactions.
DH helps me a lot but really it is myself and those here on 3FC. I've also started a blog and I like it because it helps me keep accountable to myself and others. If I write down everything, then I am really being honest with myself.
For the most part, it's just me. Sometimes my trainer will ask me what I've been eating, particularly if I've been off-plan for a few days, and that has sometimes been very helpful. Also, knowing that my SO will probably notice if I eat every last piece of food in the house is sometimes the only thing that stands between me and the fridge.
As a general rule, though, I agree with JayEll that I don't want my friends and family that involved in my weight situation. Particularly with my SO, I think it is very important that I be responsible for what I eat and when I exercise, and that he remain supportive but completely neutral on these issues. 1) We have enough stuff to fight about without adding my diet and exercise to the list and 2) It is important that I feel like he loves me the way that I am; that he isn't trying to make me skinnier or prettier. It's great when he compliments me, but I don't want him telling me that I shouldn't eat something or that I've put on a few pounds. That's my responsibility.
And my friends just don't want to hear the day-in day-out stuff. We talk about what I'm doing sometimes, but some of them are struggling with their own choices about their own food and exercise, so they don't want to hear a constant recitation of how many calories I'm eating or how much I've exercised. And while that stuff is endlessly fascinating to me; not so much for others.
So really, it is 3FC where I pour out my heart about my diet and exercise. And I sometimes use the planning threads on 3FC to hold myself accountable. Honestly, this forum has been a huge source of support!
Who helps keep you accountable?
And my sisters know that I've lost weight, but I don't go into details.
