New here....am 315 lbs and feel like such a failure. Why have I let myself get to to his point? I have a problem at night I binge eat and can't stop, even when I am hurting from eating so much. But every night it is the same. How can I stop? Anybody?:?:
03-06-2007, 04:43 PM
First off, welcome aboard 3FC. You're taking a step in the right direction by posting here. You'll find so much info and support from people in your same situation. There are many different forums here but if you just sit and browse you should find somewhere that you'll fit right in. I have had problems with binge eating as well, what helps me is to not have junk foods in the house. I know from personal experience that when I binge eat, I may not even be eating only junk foods--I'll eat whatever is there. But when that mood strikes, logging on here and reading about other peoples issues makes me realize that I'm not alone, that other people are struggling too and making it through another day, that gives me some comfort. Do you have friends or family that you can confide in? Maybe someone you could take a short walk with? Just to get out of the house and away from the kitchen, that helps me sometimes. Or maybe read a good book to keep your mind occupied on something other than eating. Just keep browsing through the forums and I'm sure you'll find your niche here. Good luck and I wish you peace.
03-06-2007, 05:09 PM
one step at a time.....you've identified the problem, you KNOW you don't want to sabotage yourself.....I will overeat when i feel overwrought/anxious too, ( I can too easily find myself standing at the fridge at 3AM opening some cold pasta or a jar of peanut butter).....take a step back, and ask yourself WHY or promise yourself if you still want it in 20 mins. you can have it....you probably won't
3FC is open 24/7.....there is always something to read here and writing it down is helpful for you.
03-06-2007, 06:07 PM
You don't sound too chippy....and you posted first in the depression board. Methinks you might want to think about getting some professional help from a psychiatrist, psychologist, primary doctor, priest, rabbi, minister, mother, best friend........
We are of course here too and always want to help but maybe you could use some extra support and insight. :)
03-08-2007, 09:11 PM
I think we all have reached that point at one time that we have no idea how we got to the weight we find ourselves at. I know I for sure have been there. I know you have it in you to do this, because I didnt think in a million years I could lose weight, and I'm half way to my goal. Take it one day at a time!
03-09-2007, 08:46 PM
I feel for you. I have binged on sugar especially until I thought I would pass out. This has been going on for a loooong time. Just the other day I had a realization. No amount of food would ever be enough for me. Not until I drop dead. This was just about 10 days ago that I realized this and I have not binged since. It's like a bell went off in my head. Maybe that was my rock bottom or moment of truth. But binging is only one of my eating problems. I have a lot of other problems to tackle. What I have found is that coming here helps me. When I feel weak or lonely, I get online and read and reply. Talking to others help me to refocus outside myself for awhile and I stop obsessing over food for just a little while. Come here often, talk to us and let us care about you. :hug:
03-09-2007, 09:39 PM
Welcome to 3FC! You are definitely in the right place, if you havent already.. check out chicks in control, its a place where you can speak freely about binges and have people to support you. I used to binge, sometimes I even still have mini binges but I have learned to stop, I have been a spitter ( chew the food to get the taste and spit it out) * never had a clue that was abnormal* I have and am still very prone to a form of bulemia where I will binge and then exercise to the point of exhaustion to "get rid of it" and thats because I hate throwing up and could never do it. So see.. we just throw our skeletons on the table here at 3fc, so your in the right place, your not alone, and you can and will lose weight. :)
03-09-2007, 09:45 PM
Hey. Don't beat yourself up--that will just make you sadder. It didn't happen to any of us overnight--anyway, I didn't wake up fat one morning! ;)
Focus on where you're at now! You are still alive, for one thing! And you can still make choices. You have resources available.
It may be hard to break the habit of eating at night, but you can do it. Start by eating the correct amount of food during the day. Trying to "make up" the next day by not eating sometimes just starts a cycle. Your body does get hungry and needs nutrients, even though you are overweight. Lots of information is around this site on how much to eat and different programs one can try.
Check in with the 300+ forum here--you'll find there are many chicks and roosters who have been where you are--and have changed. Read some of the success stories in the Goals! forum also.
Best wishes! Please hang in there! We want you to succeed. :hug:
03-10-2007, 12:38 AM
Welcome sadnfat, sorry to hear you're not doing so well. :(
I would throw out all the unhealthy binge food (anything junky that can be eaten without being cooked..you know what I mean ;) ), and I would replace it with healthy food. In the meantime, I would eat a healthy breakfast and lunch and a few healthy planned snacks in between, like Jay suggests.
At night, when you feel that urge to binge maybe start munching on the healthy food you replaced your junk with. Stuff like fatfree yogurt over berries, lo-cal creamsicles (40 cals), oatmeal w/ raisins, any kind of fruit, a grilled cheese on lo-cal Pepperidge Farm bread (45 cal per slice), hebrew national fatfree hot dogs 50 cals, baby arugala w/ goat cheese and a little olive oil/lemon, Amy's organic soup, french toast made w/ egg beaters (about 1/2 the calories of whole eggs) and lo-cal Pepperidge Farm bread (45 cal) w/ sugar-free syrup, or an egg beaters omelette with reduced fat cheese. SUBSTITUTE wherever possible to cut calories and still get to munch.
And maybe add just a little walking..just start with a few blocks and add a little more each time. If there's nowhere outside to walk, a lot of the ladies on here do the Walk Away The Pounds videos. I've never tried them but they seem popular on here and doable for anyone.
Good for you for trying! Just take things one step at a time.
03-10-2007, 08:17 AM
I know, I know, I KNOW. I've looked at myself (briefly) in the mirror, and been in total and complete despair. Periodically tell myself it doesn't matter, who cares anyway, why should I bother trying to lose weight...the bingeing stuff at night, oh, yeah! And sneaky about it, too! :s: - waiting for my husband to go off to bed and get to sleep before I started cramming the food down, because I was ashamed of myself for doing it. :sorry:
BUT, after feeling lousy and being miserable for TOO LONG, I'm doing it for ME, and have been battling that binge eating stuff mostly by eating small meals over the course of the day (I'm counting calories, eating high fiber, low fat, and drinking a LOT of water, which is something I never thought I could do). If I don't let myself get overly hungry, I don't get into that craving mode. I'm just starting, too - let's do this together! OH, and OMG! This site is SO helpful. If I feel any desire to eat anything I shouldn't at night, I hop right on the computer and get inspired. Seriously, some of these stories - and before and after pictures - are just amazing! They've done it, and so can we! Keep reading, and keep posting, sad...we're here for you, and you'll be here for us.
03-12-2007, 05:33 AM
the bingeing stuff at night, oh, yeah! And sneaky about it, too! :s: - waiting for my husband to go off to bed and get to sleep before I started cramming the food down, because I was ashamed of myself for doing it. :sorry: ......
I do this same thing almost everynight... I have this thing in my head about people seeing me eat, i feel like if they see me eat then they are automatically going to look at me and the first thought that is going to pop into their head that im fat, this is why i dont like to eat in front of people.
the night binges started when we first brought my daughter home from the hospital, there were a few nights that she woul slppe almost all night but mostly she was up every 2 or 3 hrs wanting to eat so i mostly was awake all night with nothing to do but watch tv and eat.eventually i started making trips to the corner store before it got late and i would go pick up my snacks for the night and if i ran out my boyfriends little sister would order from a resturant of a corner store and we would get more food. i got into the habit and just stayed doing it, and when i try to diet it just gets worse because by the end of the day im really hungry because im used to eating alot and i hadnt eating much durring the day.
03-12-2007, 01:02 PM
Kayla's Mommy - you really HAVE to eat during the day in order to avoid that habitual hunger at night. And, eating smaller amounts more often - like six small meals instead of three big ones - keeps your metabolism up to speed, so that's a secondary benefit to relieving hunger as well. When I was on the Atkins diet (which I stayed on for seven years at my maintenance weight) I got used to eating really huge portions, and because it was all high protein, I could get away with eating just a couple of times a day. But all that meat, cheese, and fat really started to get to me - it's just not possible for ME (I know it works for others) to make that a lifetime plan. So, I've changed my eating pattens completely. Now I'm eating very high fiber, low calorie, drinking a LOT of water, and walking just about every other day. I have a full cup of Fiber One cereal for breakfast with either some cut up strawberries, a handful of raisins, or some frozen blueberries on it with skim milk. At @ 10:00 (I have breakfast at 7:00) I have either a fresh pear with some high fiber, low calorie crackers or a sliced apple with a heaping tablespoon of peanut butter. For lunch, I either have a tuna salad or a chicken salad sandwich made on a whole wheat pita with a good bunch of salad stuffed in with it. OR, if I've made my "diet" cabbage soup with 93% lean hamburg, v-8 juice, beef broth, celery, onions, carrots and black beans, I'll have a cup of that with a piece of whole wheat pita. Another snack in midafternoon, and lean meat or chicken for supper with maybe a baked sweet potato, plenty of salad or some green beans, maybe a pita. Then, around 8:30 or so, I'll eat a good handful of almonds and maybe a handful of raisins or another piece of fruit. And water, water, water. I drink at least 4 16-oz. bottles a day, often more. It keeps your system flushed out and makes you less hungry.
Hope this helps a little -
03-14-2007, 12:13 AM
Thanks Ella that does help a bit! i guess i didnt relize that when i dont eat much durring the day that would make me more hungry at night... it makes perfect sence though! my #1 problem area when it comes to eating is sweets I LOVE THEM! i always have to have sweets, it had gotten so bad that a few months ago i had to have candy in the house, in my pockets, im my purse,and everywhere else i could stash it, if i didnt have it i would get so crankey it was like i was addicted to candy, it was pretty sad, so i had to cut myself off for a while and people just had to deal with the crankeyness i couldnt hide or control, but now im starting back on that path to feeling like i need sugar everyday and i have to be careful because diabeties runs heavily in my family... so do you guys have any advice for that?
03-14-2007, 08:09 AM
Hello Miz Kaylas Mommy! I thought that gorgeous baby looked familiar from the pic..LOL..she's my baby's cousin!..so glad to see you here getting great advice from my wonderful ladies on 3FC.
What about replacing fruit with all the sweets. So at night when Jason eats all that junk food you have your fruit and you munch away on that to your heart's content. You'll sure be teaching Kayla some great habits!
03-14-2007, 09:39 AM
Hey Kayla's Mommy, Mami suggested fruit which is really good but if I am needing a little extra "bad" I dip my fruit in light cool whip. Frozen peaches are the best cause it gets rid of my ice cream cravings (my downfall).
03-14-2007, 10:16 AM
Hi again, Kaylasmommy!
I just had to respond again, because truly, that craving for sweets isn't "like" an addiction, it IS an addiction, and I've had it all my life! Without getting too clinical, here, some people (me) DO have "addictive personalities". Luckily, I've never had much of a taste for drugs or alcohol, because if I did, I'd probably be out on the street right now. Mine has always been confined to smoking - and FOOD, and by food, I mean primarily sweets and starches. That's what I have always craved. I stopped smoking several times in the past, but always gained weight :hun: and gave up and started smoking again. This past January, I quit FOR GOOD because it really and truly was affecting my health. :( I was exhausted all the time, and climbing a few stairs, or just carrying a few bags of groceries into the house had me breathing heavily. SO, that's done. Then, the eating started - the LARGE Cadbury chocolate with almonds ON MY WAY HOME from the office, candy bars hidden in my pocketbook to eat after my DH went to bed at night, stops every morning on my way TO work for TWO McDonald's McGriddles with sausage - and ironically, coffee with one equal. :dizzy: So, I was overweight to start with, and then put on 14 pounds after I quit smoking. Ordinarily, that would send me dashing out to the nearest convenience store for a pack of ciggies, but this time I am DETERMINED. I decided that I would have to RE-PROGRAM myself to eat what was good for me instead of what I wanted all the time. Thus began my many-meals-a-day, high-fiber, low calorie, low fat eating and drinking mega-amounts of water.
And you know what? It's working! I feel great, I feel optimistic, and I feel healthier than I have in a long, long, time. The craving for snacks at night is gone almost completely (just by making sure I get enough during the day) but as I said before, a handful of nuts, maybe some raisins - that kind of thing - satisfies me completely.:dance:
BUT, about the sweets. It really IS an addition, Kaylasmommy, and the only way you can deal with an addition to anything is to cut it out entirely. Once you do that - and maybe suffer through a few uncomfortable days - or even weeks - the cravings finally do subside, and eventually, they disappear altogether unless you trigger them by eating sweets. Even a tiny cookie or a freaking M&M can do it, trust me. An alcoholic cannot take ONE drink, and we sweets addicts can't eat ONE cookie, of a "tiny piece of candy" because it triggers binges. I really envy those people who CAN just eat a *little* of something - a sliver of cake, a cookie - but I'm not one of them, and it doesn't sound like you are.
SO, Kaylasmommy, my best advice is make sure you eat enough during the day (while counting calories, carbs, or whatever you're watching) and absolutely give up anything sweet. (I DO use artificial sweeter occasionally, though, and there are no ill effects - some say they kick in the cravings, but that doesn't happen with me.)
Good luck, sweetie - you're going to do just fine!:hug:
03-14-2007, 01:18 PM
Binging is the beast that feeds on you at night. It attacks, chews up your self-esteem, gnaws at your hope, and rips apart your will. It is ugly, waits around the corner drooling and snarling. Sometimes I just go to bed.
But, during the day you can make gobs of chopped veggies with some low-cal bean dips, salsa, etc. Stock up on low-fat popcorn. Make a ton of sugarfree jello and have lots of fat free whipped cream on hand. Go ahead and make some super low calorie free soup and have it ready to microwave and some FF saltines. If it happens...at least be prepared to do the least amount of damage as you can. One other little thing...try to stop thinking about it when the moment is there. Distract yourself. Every moment you distract yourself is a spoonful of ice cream that doesn't go in your mouth.
Also, don't buy your favorite binge products. Just don't buy them.