100 lb. Club - new girl (it's a long one)

View Full Version : new girl (it's a long one)

12-17-2006, 02:20 PM
Hi, I'm Nikki, I'm 19 years old and I live in NY. I figured this was a good place to post since I have about 140 lbs. to lose. I've pretty much been overweight since I was 7 but in the last 5 years, I have lost all control. I used to be very depressed and basically never leave my house. To compensate for how I felt, I would binge eat. This caused me to gain 96 lbs. in 5 years. I had absolutely NO self control (still working on it) and just went to **** with myself.

I've been on diets for about 7 or 8 years. I used to do WW but personally I need something more restrictive. I've been on and off LAWL for about 4 years now. My problem is, I lose weight but quickly lose my motivation. I am currently a member of LAWL since 7/9/06. My sorority's formal was 7/7/06 and when I saw those pictures, I was horrified. I looked like a whale next to my athletic boyfriend and I knew something had to be done. I managed to lose 10 lbs. but of course I had to stick to my form and I soon went off. I recently went back (after COUNTLESS voicemails from my consultant) yesterday and am hoping to turn myself around.

Most people love NY because of the shopping, I don't. Not because fashion is not a hobby of mine but because I would never be able to find something cute (to my standards) in my size. I would LOVE to one day be able to buy off the rack in ANY clothing store that I go into. I'm a sister in a sorority that has some of the most beautiful girls I've seen. They also have amazing bodies and I always feel like the "fat one". I would love for one day to share clothes with them and maybe even *gasp* go shopping with them.

I'm 19 so yes a lot of my goals have to do with appearance but I am also concerned about my health. I am fortunate enough to not have any health problems as of now (knock on wood) but I am probably at a very high risk for them. Also, in almost 20 years I managed to gain nearly 300 lbs. if I keep going at this rate I'll be 600 lbs. by the time I'm 40 (or even earlier). I want to stop this now and I'm just hoping I can stick to it this time.

Sorry for this being so long but I had to introduce myself somehow :)

12-17-2006, 04:24 PM
Welcome, Nikki! You are so right about doing something about this now versus waiting. I'm 34, and I look back at the things I missed out on because, frankly, I was too busy being fat.

The other thing I wish I had done earlier was figure out why I was a binge eater and fix the underlying problem. I lost 120 pounds 5 years ago and gained it back because I hadn't done that. All the cute clothes and attention in the world won't stop us from regaining if we don't work on why we're fat in the first place.

Anyway, I'm glad you found this place! People are so supportive and have lotsof great ideas. I know there are LAWL threads too, but you don't have to limit yourself to any particular thread. I get a lot out of reading lots of them.


12-17-2006, 04:39 PM
Hi Nikki, I'm totally with C.C. on everything she said, I'm 30, and it was so much easier to lose before, but, I didn't go through the feelings behind it all, and here I am again... but here at 3fc, is the best place I can think of to do it again, there's always someone who knows how *I* feel, or is going through something similar to where I'm at, and, some of the success stories around here... wow.

12-17-2006, 07:13 PM
Hi Nikki! Welcome to the group. You are doing a good thing for yourself. I have found that by checking msgs here every day helps me stay on track. I'm 35 and I've steadily gained weight since I was about 22 and have been at my current weight for 4-5 years....I do have some regrets about not doing some things I enjoy because i was too embarassed to go out in public....like going to the beach.....and always worrying about what other people were saying about me. Well, I sort of got over that and do what I can now...I recently got my motorcycle license!! :carrot: So, keep your chin up. Exercise as much as you can and drink your water!!

12-17-2006, 08:45 PM
Welcome to the forum Nikki! I think it is wonderful that you have realized that you need to stop the bad habits now. There are plenty of people here that say or think to themselves "if only I had fixed the problem when I was young". You have taken wonderful steps...keep it up so that you don't spend your life regretting not completing those steps!

I look forward to seeing your progress and reading more posts from you!


12-17-2006, 09:06 PM
Hey Nikki...welcome to the group. Everyone here is amazing, inspirational, funny and kind. Keep posting and keep us posted on your progress!!

12-17-2006, 11:35 PM

So glad you're starting this journey early in your life.

12-17-2006, 11:44 PM
I'm 19 so yes a lot of my goals have to do with appearance but I am also concerned about my health. I am fortunate enough to not have any health problems as of now (knock on wood) but I am probably at a very high risk for them.

I can totally relate. I'm 20, so I'm young and shallow too! ;) Seriously though, the health concerns have always been in the back of my mind, and to be honest, they kind of still are. I think it's the invincible feeling of youth.

You CAN do this though! Check out the before and after pics of some of the fabulous, brave, and strong members have posted here; they are SUCH huge motivators for me!!

12-18-2006, 12:51 AM
Nikki -

:wel3fc: You have found a great place for support!!

I think that it's really great that you are trying to turn this around at such a young age. I really wish I had.

Glad to have you, hope to hear more from you. Check out this link (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=76425), it has some good info for newbies!

12-18-2006, 11:48 AM
Hi Nikki.... I can totally understand and relate to everything you've shared!! I always had the skinny friends, I was always the whale in the picture, and I yo-yo dieted for years!! You've found a great place for support though, and with some hardwork you will be able to share clothes with your skinny friends!!

Good Luck!! :carrot:

12-18-2006, 07:03 PM
I can totally relate. I'm 20, so I'm young and shallow too! ;)
Count me in that group, too! I'm 24 and have been overweight/obese pretty much my whole life, so I really just want sooooo badly to be able to shop in NORMAL stores instead of the limited plus sections of some stores. I never go shopping with friends because I feel bad making them go to the fat section with me (not that they would mind, really, but I hate for them to have to accomodate me like that, ya know?).

Anyway, welcome, and you are sooo not alone!

Laura Philly
12-18-2006, 07:55 PM
Hi Nikki,
It sounds like you are really struggling. I'm glad you are reaching out for help. It can be done and like so many others have said, now is the time! Don't compare yourself to anyone but yourself. Have you ever gone to OA?

12-19-2006, 10:00 AM
:welcome3: Nikki to the group! This group is great for support and can give you a:kickbutt: if required. I am on LAWL at the moment and there is some good support in that forum as well. Maybe LAWL is not for you. I know I have tried several different plans before I had found the right one for me. Read up on the different plans that people are on and you will find the right one for you. A lot of us look at this as a lifestyle change, and you need to find one that fits you. Good luck and keep posting so we can get to know you!

12-25-2006, 10:54 AM
I can relate to you too Nikki! I am 19 and will be 20 in less than a week and I am shallow too. I kinda let go of myself because of the holiday season... And I am so worried about what I may or may not look like after...

What bothers me is that I already know what to do, yet I still do not do it!!! I've recieved many comments that say "You are lucky you are doing something about it now..." But frankly speaking I think it is a little bit too late... I am extremely terrified about loose skin...

Sometimes, that is what brings me down. I finally decided that no matter what happens, I would do it, I would stick to it... It is hard... Especially for young ones like us I think, because we want to do so many things...

I guess what I'm saying is that support always helps. There are times I don't think about it, but it does creep up at the back of my mind...

But like everyone on 3fc says, it is do-able :) so welcome :)

12-25-2006, 03:01 PM
Hi Nikki I'm new here to.I just found the site a few days ago and I'am so inspired.I have 115lbs to loose but,I'm ready for the challenge.We are glad you are here.I was living in a state of denial until I came here and now WOW I'am so ready for the new year you have come to a good place.Hope to here from you again.Stay strong,take back your life,but most of all laugh,at everything fat or thin life is better when you laugh.

Hope Full
12-26-2006, 02:17 PM
Hi Nikki. I am new here, too, and just posted my introduction message. All the replies you have recieved are so supportive and helpful! Do not begrudge yourself that your main motives right now are about looks and clothes--I wish I had done something serious back when that was my focus, instead of now when I am more concerned about my health. I don't know that it matters what motivates you to get started, because we are going to have to keep finding motivations every step along the way. That is what seems to be so wonderful about this forum--everyone is motivating each other. I hope you and I are both still here, inching towards our goal, offering support to ourselves and others, for a long time to come.