[kmac1196]

I used to have fun. Be less stressed. Less focused...less white knuckled. Sometimes too much knowledge can be paralyzing. Cals in/ cals out....workouts. Weights.

I resorted to wearing my bodymedia armband and checking it several times a day...adjusting my cals to fit....adjusting macros.

Sure some of that can be just fine...but I've become obsessive. It's been crippling. Every morning on my computer while I have my coffee is spent searching for the "right" mix. I've dropped low cal...taken breaks at TDEE....back down, 25% cut, 1k deficit, 500 deficit.....only the scale isn't moving.

I've lost 70 lbs...40 ish to go. I KNOW how to lose weight....I just don't know how to relax...which is clearly a roadblock. I give advice all the time about the scale...yet don't take my own.

So yesterday, I decided, enough is enough. I'm going to lighten up....relax. think about my journey and not the end game. Control the things I can control, and let the rest go. Took off the armband. Logged off of MFP. Picked up my WW paper tracker and relaxed. I'm still me. I have other interests though I can't remember what they were.....LOL

If you don't believe in cortisol (and other hormones that can tank things for you while trying to lose weight), trust me when I say it's real.

I just thought I'd post something to give others who might be going through this, too, a nudge that you're not alone.

Today....hanging with friends. Lunch out and tarot cards on the agenda. An over all fun fun day. And then, dinner and tv with my honey tonight. And maybe some wine.

Also, I'm giving up the scale for a while. It's not helping me....not at all.

[Raisin5Cookies]

Good for you. I have an obsessive personality - I went crazy on WW many moons ago and recognised that same danger signal, managed to stop myself before it got too bad. I think it's much easier these days to get obsessive with all the high tech tools at our fingertips. I hope you can find balance.

[kmac1196]

I just read your other post about not weighing....you are my hero!!!!!

I know I can get balance. I have to let go. I'm a bit of a control freak and sometimes it works for me , other times against me.

I can control what I eat (which has always been healthy) and what I exercise ( I walk and lift). Beyond that.....Leaving it up to God.

[Raisin5Cookies]

Love your attitude! I do believe we all have a "set point" range of weight that our bodies naturally gravitate towards, provided we are eating healthily and all that jazz. Working with the body's set point rather than against it is a good thing, imo.

[Palestrina]

Good for you for identifying this obsession and taking steps to ease up on it! I don't think people understand how debilitating stress can be to weightloss and health in general.

When I was stuck in the diet cycle I was either completely stressed and anxious about numbers or I didn't care at all and let myself go. I was either on ON or OFF mode. Finding a happy balance has been difficult but worthwhile. I practice intuitive eating now and while weightloss is on a back burner for me I have found enjoyment in food and exercise again and havr learned how to appreciate my body for what it looks like and what it can do.

I gave up weighing myself, logging food, tracking calories, weighing food, limiting carbs/fats/etc measuring myself, stopped wearing my Fitbit, stopped writing down my exercises and pre prepping my meals and disconnected MFP off my phone. I also stopped reading health and fitness magazines and stopped participating in casual banter about food and diets. To my surprise there is a whole world out there that has nothing to do with calories or food! I realized that exercise is much more rewarding if I don't think about how many calories I burned.

Life, that's really what I want. Weightloss can be a part of it but it can't be everything. In fact I see many people lose weight and remain disappointed in their life. Happiness is something I have to work on regardless of weightloss.

[kmac1196]

Yes! Absolutely yes to all of it! Thanks for sharing!

[IanG]

To make this journey work you have to be a lot or a little obsessive in my opinion unless you are happy in a fat body which is a reasonable goal in itself. But well done in easing up on the stress. I used to track everything religiously and weigh every day and post here every day and think continuously about weightloss, exercise and health. It worked. And it worked very well. But you reach a point in your journey when you just have to relax. The losses aren't there any more and there are new goals. Like staying fit. Or building muscle. Or just enjoying the body and mind you have worked so hard to achieve.

So what you are doing is healthy. But a little obsession is always good in this game as well. Don't lose all of it

A trick is to develop new and healthy interests. I weight train and run. But I also box and dance. These are things I never did before but they are so much fun. But again you need a little bit, or a lot, of obsession or even passion to make them work. Otherwise I would not do dance classes twice a week.

Not being obsessed or being less obsessed should not mean not caring or being not interested any more. Otherwise the journey is over.

[kmac1196]

I agree....I'm not done. I'm still counting and I'll weigh maybe monthly. I know I still have 50 lbs to go...ish. BUT when I am doing all that I can do (run 3 days, lift 3 days, 1 day casual walk), deficit 500-1k daily, and the scale goes up .8 lbs or some weeks down measly .4......I know logically there is more going on. Water retention, stress, etc. But the number on the scale was breaking me. Like it negated everything I'd done the week before....when I know how to do it and what to do.

So I'm going to do what I know is the right path and lighten up...it will eventually come off. Maybe I still see the 2 lbs at the end of the month so the average is still the same but it's less of the focus.

I understand what you are saying but dedicated and tunnel vision are 2 very different things.