For me small changes worked wonders. Starting a huge new diet regime was WAY too overwhelming for me at the beginning. My first step was just getting in regular exercise, then I chipped away at my diet one step at a time. DON'T beat yourself up about how you got here but instead look at what you can do now. Is there any thing that you can agree to doing for a week at least? Even a day? It could either be food or exercise related, pick what you think would be easiest for you to do. Once you're able to accomplish one step of the journey, the rest are much easier to take.