Now that is ridiculous! I misunderstood the OP. I was assuming she was referring to asking restaurants to actually cook the meal differently. But to simply ask for a change of a side dish is something I regularly do and I think ANY restaurant worth its salt should accommodate such requests. That waiter had some nerve, and I would definitely have shown my displeasure in the tip.

I was out for breakfast the other day and ordered an omlette. I told the waitress to just hold the homefries, and she offered to replace them with a fruit cup. Now that's service!

I can't remember a time i went out and DIDN'T alter my meal!!! This is my typical sat night out, if i order a salad, it has to be altered to have cheese and dressing on the side, no matter what salad, it has to have romaine lettuce, chicken well done and so on! My bf looks at me in horror! I alter everything i order lol, they don't mind and if they do.."too bad" is what my ww leader says!! We are paying for it so it should come as we would like to eat it!!

I did a lot of waitressing years ago. The biggest pet peeve that I had was the amount of food that went to waste. I would have so much rather given the customers what they wanted to eat! I agree a difference in prep methods may be too much for some places, but if they won't substitute or give you attitude, I'd go somewhere else.

Te he...this reminds me of an incident I had in a Chinese restaurant in a small town. I ordered the lemon shrimp, but I asked for the sauce on the side. The waitress argued with me and argued with me about this. She said that nobody orders the sauce on the side, just me. I kept telling her I didn't care what other people did, I wanted the sauce on the side. She kept telling me that I was the only one who ever asked for that. And around it went. I finally just put my foot down and said put the sauce on the side or else. Or else what, I don't know, because this was the only Chinese restaurant around and I wonder if the entire staff had the same attitude.

The sauce came out, on the side, but it should never have been that difficult. All her stubbornness did was make me feel embarrassed in front of my dining companion. Not sure what the big deal was there, but I tell the story because I wonder if there are many restaurants that are reluctant to accommodate us.

This may be a cultural issue rather than anything else. If she was really Chinese, I am not surprised, because it's just so unusual to do that. I used to work in a Chinese restaurant and while they are generally very keen to keep the customer happy, the idea of "different" orders are somewhat unheard of (ie. sauce on the side - no sauce - and especially vegan/vegetarian substitutions for many, as fish flakes/shrimp may not be 'vegetarian').

People probably hate me when I walk into a restaurant.

I'm not ashamed to be a little picky.

First I'll choose what I want from the menu, and FREQUENTLY ask if I can "have that without butter, steam the veggies, dressing on the side, no cheese sprinkled, and with this substituted".

But! It's all about how you ask. "May I please have it <done like this>?" Server usually replies "Sure" and then I say "Thank you so much! I appreciate it."

Definitely. I almost always ask to replace potatoes etc with steamed vegetables with no oil or butter, salads always with no croutons and the dressing and cheese on the side, and if I can't find anything on the menu that fits my needs, I will usually ask for a plain house salad with a grilled chicken breast on top.

That said, I went to a swanky chef place for lunch today, and didn't make any special requests, and enjoyed every bite (and ate like a bird the rest of the day to make up for the 1000 cal lunch lol)

I usually don't ask to alter the prep method and just order carefully instead (I go for the fish, seafood, chicken, salad or a broth-based soup), but I routinely ask for items to be left off, put on the side, or for different side dishes (veg or fruit) rather than the standard. I also don't hesitate to ask for the full nutritional info for the menu at any restaurant that I suspect might have it (most chains do have something available). Most servers and kitchens have been very accomodating, and I tip very well.